I am not this girl's parent or sibling, I am just a very caring friend. I'm 17 and I know she'll listen more to me than anybody else, including her parents. Today she got a progress report saying that she has a lot of missing work. I had a talk with her and obviously she wasn't happy with what I had to say. I'd really like to be able to help her get this under control. She stays after school a lot and her parents have given up because she doesn't listen to a word they say. She constantly lies to her family about having done her homework. What have you found effective in motivating little kids? Especially kids who are in the "I don't give a $hit about school" mood?
2007-02-05 20:17:36 · 12 answers · asked by World of Suffering 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Well obviously she needs a goal and when I asked her what would motivate her more she said she didn't know. It would help me if somebody posted his/her success story for me.
2007-02-05 20:25:36 · update #1
Her parents do care about her, it's just that they've tried everything and they've stopped getting angry because it's a waste of time.
She's admitted that she's just too lazy to do her work and that she'd rather hang out with her friends after school than go home and do work. I'm looking for a way to make her see that she's the only one who can change anything. She still thinks the point of homework is just to get a grade....
2007-02-05 20:36:49 · update #2
First, it isnt your responsibility. You can talk until you are blue in the face, but you cant force her to deal with the consequences. My children do homework FIRST, play second. If homework isnt finished, with me having looked over it and signed the agenda, there is no games, no tv, no outside play....NOTHING. So I would suggest to this girl's parents that they tell her to do her homework or she can forget any play activities. They need to have the teacher send home a list of what needs to be done for homework, they check that against the daughters work and make sure they match up. There is no other way but to take away privileges for not getting work done.
2007-02-06 04:32:10 · answer #1 · answered by an88mikewife 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possible that she has a learning disability.
Her parents can request that the school test her. If a learning disorder is found she can take special classes and do independent study.
A lie is always a cover for some uncomfortable truth. She lies about her homework (doesn't sound like it's to avoid getting in trouble) because she's having problems. Maybe the other kids bully her or the teacher gives her a hard time or she just has trouble keeping up. Whatever the real issue is, she has to feel comfortable and supported when discussing it.
This is up to the parents.
2007-02-05 20:30:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps she's having trouble at home (stress from family can cause this), or maybe she has an undiagnosed learning disability. Thats what was wrong with me when I was that age. I just eventually gave up trying because nothing I would do was any help... I'd just stop doing homework assignments (its better than trying a bunch of times and getting every problem wrong on the page). I lied to my parents about it, and I went to a tutor (who I asked about my difficulties and I asked if it could be learning disability) who didn't help, they just laughed at me when I suggested it. A few years later, I eventually took a learning disability test, and they found out that a learning disability was exactly what was "wrong" with me.
Ask her if she's having a hard time keeping up with the other kids or remembering how to do problems..
2007-02-05 20:26:09 · answer #3 · answered by Rae-Rae Nikkoles <3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you from experience with my own daughter that the only way to get this turned around is by being consistent and work with the teachers.
My daughter was a couple years older than your friend when she decided that homework was a waste of time and her friends were more important. I believed her when she told me that she completed her homework and that she was getting decent grades. When I received one of her progress reports and saw her horrible grades, I was really shocked. I went to her school and her teachers and I set up a system. She had to have her planner (or agenda) signed by each teacher everyday to show that she turned in her homework. If she did not complete her homework her teachers notified me. At home, if I found out that she was not doing her homework, I took away things she enjoyed,starting with what she enjoyed the most (i.e. hanging out with friends) and she could not have her freedom back until she showed me her homework was completed and properly done. My daughter did not understand that homework was so important! She thought it was a waste of time. Unfortunately, she failed that grade and had to repeat it! That was devastating to her and that woke her up big time! She was humilitated to have to go to school the next year and all of her friends were in the next grade except her. She realized that homework was very important. It took failing a grade for her to understand all of that.
Good luck to you and your friend!
2007-02-05 23:29:16 · answer #4 · answered by blueyonder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That age can be tough. My brother's best friend used to lie about his work too at that age. The thing that my parents do eith my brother (now 10) is that they give him something like a candy bar or toy. Another way is for it to seem like fun if she has to right an essay on a pet just ask her questions about her perfect pet, but say things like "(child's name here) what is your idea of a perfect pet" after watching tv or reading a book. don't ask "get that report done on the pet now!" that will; just put u in her HATE circle. Soon she will find homework fun
2007-02-06 00:31:00 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe there is something going on in her life that has nothing to do with school and homework and that is how she is acting out. Maybe she is dyslexic or can't read and that is why she doesn't want to do homework or maybe the work is just to hard for her to do. Could be any number of things? Since you can talk to her and she listens to you, ask her if something is going on that she wants to talk about with you. Good Luck. It is good to see that you are so concerned for this child.
2007-02-06 08:54:19 · answer #6 · answered by Caleb's Mom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The question doesnt state how a lot each man or woman classification raised. Their fundraising aims might want to have basically been different. So if classification a million needed to strengthen 500$ and in uncomplicated words were given 3/5 of it and sophistication 2 needed to strengthen a million,000$ and were given 3/5 of it... classification 2 might want to be the winner, yet we dont have the "purpose volume".. which makes it no longer a threat to get the answer.
2016-10-17 05:38:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
have you though maybe the work is to hard for her?
or she has a learning disability ?
you can try looking over her home work each night see if its done or sit down with her and work with her on it if she knows her parents don't care and are not going to stand by her side to get her though school there may be lil you can do try talking to her teachers see what they have to say
2007-02-05 20:32:13 · answer #8 · answered by debrasearch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs some sort of incentive. When people don't even try in school it's because it doesn't matter whether they do or not, so why bother? Just as you ilustrated stating her parents have given up. She needs a goal to get to to get her excited about acheiving.
2007-02-05 20:22:49 · answer #9 · answered by Honesty given here! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, obviously she knows her mom and dad don't give a crap about her, in my opinion 1 of 2 things are going on in which case SOMETHING needs to be done.
1. she is starting to become a woman and is starting her period
2. she is or was being molested by someone she THOUGHT she could trust .talk to her about counseling . good luck
2007-02-05 22:38:46 · answer #10 · answered by Mark 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋