Re: School apology letter --proof read 10 points?

Question

This is what I go so far:

"Dear Ms. Friel,
I am sorry for disrespecting your staff. I honestly have learned from just thinking of going to behavior school, some of my friends' parents were telling me about their kids going there and that it was terrible and after that, it just came to me that I might be going there. Behavior school has been on my mind everyday and I've been stressing over all the craziest things that might happen when I go there, and I seriously do think that this 'suspension' was all I needed to realize that if this doesn't stop then that is where I will be going. But I promise that I won't be sagging, disrespecting nor talking back to the teachers. Could I please have one more chance? If I screw this up [which I won't] you can send me out like that, but I promise that I have learned from this.

Thanks-- Taylor"

Can someone correct this or make it sound better please? 10 points..

nope, I live in las vegas and shes a principle.

Answer 1

"Dear Ms. Friel,
I apologize for disrespecting your staff. I have thought about what it would be like to go to behavior school and I can honestly say that I have learned my lesson. I do believe that this suspension was all that I need to realize that I was in the wrong and need to get my act together. I promise to correct my ways and to not be disrespectful to the teachers again! Please will you give me a chance to prove myself? If I do mess up again then I believe I deserve what's to be coming of it, but I honestly can say that I have learnt my lesson from this!

Thank you- Taylor"

You never add in words like 'screwed up'! lol! Good luck bro! :-)

Answer 2

Dear Ms. Friel,

During my time in suspension from school I have thought about how unfair my behavior has been to you, the staff and my classmates.

The thought of having to attend a behavioral management school is causing me alot of stress. I have spoken with some of my friends and their parents and it does not sound like a place I want to attend; maybe this is what I needed to experience because I think I may be scared straight now.

I apologize for the disrespect I have shown and for the disruption
I have caused in our classroom.

I am respectfully requesting one more chance at remaining in my
current school with my classmates. I understand that if I am disrespectful one more time or cause a disruption in class that
a behavioral management school is the next step in my educational career.

Thank you ,
Taylor

Answer 3

Dr. Ms. Friel,

First and foremost, I’m sorry for disrespecting your staff. That kind of behavior is clearly unacceptable and this recent suspension has taught me that. I’ve had a lot of time to think things out and I’m so ashamed just imagining myself in behavior school let alone attending. [ADD YOUR CURRENT SCHOOL NAME HERE] has not only been a source of basic education for me but a way for me to learn respect and acknowledge where my life could be headed if I do not make a positive change.

I really wish you could reconsider the punishment to send me to behavior school. While I do understand that you feel it’s in the school’s and my best interest I feel I would do better at [ADD YOUR CURRENT SCHOOL NAME]. I am hoping this suspensions and the issues I have in my past can be corrected with time and mutual trust. I truly want to change for the better and being at [ADD YOUR CURRENT SCHOOL NAME HERE] will help me achieve my goals. I appreciate your guidance and help during this pivotal moment in my life.

Thanks,
Taylor

Answer 4

I think you need to change the emphasis a bit, because at the moment it's all about you. I mean, what it reads like at the moment is "I'm sorry because I might now end up having something happen to me that I don't want". Although I'd keep what you've written, you also need, in my opinion, a large chunk of "I'm sorry because of what I DID and how it must have made the staff I disrespected FEEL".

Because otherwise it just sounds like you're trying to weasel out of something; and it doesn't really sound like you have thought about it and learned. Whereas if you can reflect on your behaviour more then you're showing them what you've learned.

I hope this makes sense. I just think that if you can put yourself in the teachers' shoes, it'll help.

Good luck, and I hope your letter gets the response you want.

Answer 5

okay. So you say all this and then you go along with prank calling your dean (for others reading this look at his other questions). You are sending them an example of why you need to go to a behavioural school. You seriously need to think about what your behaviour says to others because pulling crank calls on teachers is not a way to say that you won't be disrespecting your teachers. You may not have made the call but you went along with it and used your phone and did not stop your friend. Your actions show the truth. They will not believe your letter

Answer 6

I just wanted to say that I'm sorry about what went on yesterday. I should have never been mad because of what happened yesterday. It was wrong of me to be mad in the first place, because we never had made any plans for the day; you were bored and you took the first opportunity that you saw. Yesterday was just a selfish act on my part for wanting to spend more time with you, but I always want to spend more time with you because I like you so much. As I've said before, you have questions that I have answers to. And the answer that I would have to given you before was simply that I don't know. By the time I sat down and thought about it last night I've come to realize that there's something about your eyes that just loses me every time stare into them. I love waking up in the morning and finding you next to me; it gives me this feeling almost as if you can complete me. And for some reason, when I'm with you, I can never have a dull day no mater what we might be doing. I don't want anything that happened between us to be the end of a great friendship, because I someday hope we could be more.

Answer 7

The second sentence is extremely long. You've got like 4 commas in there. Break it up into smaller sentences.

I'd also include something about asking for specific help from her and the staff to help you stay on the right track. Just saying you're sorry and promising to be good isn't enough. You've got to show that you're serious by asking for their help. Good luck!

Answer 8

"Learnt" is British style English. No need to be so harsh. I agree that you should put some thought into how the person you mistreated felt. Your teachers put up with a lot of trouble to try to help you and your classmates become the best students you can be. They deserve your respect. Good luck in the future.

Answer 9

Do You happen to live in the cleveland area? If so i beleive i know the teacher you are talking about

Answer 10

i really don't know your situation, but if this came from your heart then it should be good enough. sounds like to me "Julio" u betta stop disrespecting, pull those pants up, n get yo butt an education!! no one can take that away from you.