We were both verbally abusive to each other and he is a drug addict now in N.A. I know I am no good for him b/c I still use drugs. I still care for him but I know it's best we're apart. How do I explain that's it's NOT him?
2007-02-05 17:14:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
WOW.
First, kudos to you for doing what's right for him. That's some real love, my friend. Let him know that it isn't that you don't want to be with him, because you do. But you know its better for him in the end for you to not be together, because you'll just fuel the fire of his addiction, and neither of you will be happy in the end. The hardest thing to do when you love someone is to let them go. You're an amazing person for this. He'll thank you in the end.
2007-02-05 17:24:23 · answer #1 · answered by ~*Bubbles*~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get your butt into NA, too. It's a great organization.
NA will tell him to change his playmates and playgrounds in order to stay sober. That would include you two breaking up.
Maybe you wouldn't be abusive to one another if you BOTH got sober and learned to love yourselves. Generally we put down people who we think make us feel bad about ourselves....when in fact, we are just really trying to avoid our own insecurities and low self-esteem. If we put them down, in our own miserable minds, we think we look or feel better. It is a sick cycle.
Something besides drugs kept you two together for 6 years.
Find the beauty, strength and courage in each other in sobriety.
Tell him that you will get back with him after you are both sober for 6 months. It will be the difference between night and day, heaven and hell.
Give it a try!
Good Luck
CF
2007-02-05 17:31:21 · answer #2 · answered by Crispy_Frog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend and I are ending an abusive 7 year relationship in June. He's moving to N.C. in June. If you realize that you're both abusive to eachother, just let him go and get on with his life. That's what I'm doing! He's not gone yet, but I have already started planning my life without him. It has its sad times, but it's the best thing for both of us. I love him enough to let him go and I love myself enough to let him go. This is the best thing that has ever happened to us! Just let go...............and get yourself some help so you can make a good new start in your life. There is no better revenge than success!
2007-02-05 17:22:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you just said it very clearly. You still have an addiction and he is trying to overcome his.If his brain clears up he will know that you are right. Have you tried to stop??
2007-02-05 17:23:21 · answer #4 · answered by Marty B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just tell him the truth that you are not good for him at this time
because he got his act together and you right now are still
doing things that are not rignt and be with him will only hurt
him when he doing so well.
2007-02-05 17:25:47 · answer #5 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need any more advice. You know exactly what you're doing and you know he's not for you and you're not for him either. It just wasn't meant to be, was it?
So, move on.
Good luck
2007-02-05 17:30:12 · answer #6 · answered by Liv 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You send him a letter with some crack in it and you'll write it all in there. He'll be takin that crack and when he reads it, he won't be able to feel sad or depressed 'cause of what you wrote. So you'll be home free!
2007-02-05 17:23:45 · answer #7 · answered by impossibilityoftruth 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The same way you just told us. But why don't you join NA?
2007-02-05 17:23:10 · answer #8 · answered by sarai_kristi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to be honest you already said it...actually you've just typed it....you can't get any clear than that,I wish you luck
2007-02-05 17:20:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋