sister inlaws?

Question

we have been married a few years. my husband has 3 sisters all married now but one was unmarried when i came to their home. actually they have some stupid thing about how the sons of the family stays at home with his folks, ok my point is why do his sisters hate me i didnt do anything to them.his mom hates me too she says i took away her only son. how did i take him away hes still living at home with his parents if anything they r keeping him from me i want him all to myself cuz of stupid tridation i have to deal with this, his mom waits 4us to have fights she gets happy calls her daughters and gives them the news. first he was really close to his mom but although he still listens to any fake drama she pulls hes a little changed is this cuz im around hes getting used to me being in his life, my point is they r at it on me i hate them all why do they hate me why.they stare at me and look at everything i do i feel they check me out cuz i look good and they r jealous but why do they hate

Answer 1

Are you sure you didn't marry your cousin?

Answer 2

First of all you and your husband need to get a place of your own. No house is ever big enough for two married women. Second, when the two of you argu keep it your business. Leave the house if you have to, but don't do it in front of your mother in law or where she can hear. Your husband should not talk about your personal lives with her knowing how it makes you feel. Once you stop giving them fuel to talk, they will have to find someone else to talk about. People like this are very insecure and try to bring others down to their level because they can't get up to theirs. Stand strong, Stand your ground, and get out of that house.

Answer 3

They don't need a reason to hate you. I've never been married but I have been in this kind of situation. It's the "you're a bad example/you're dragging him down/that's your fault/you're ruining his future" crap that crawls under your skin.
Remember that if you can make your husband smile and laugh, you're a good wife. The only thing that could ruin that is to get stuck on these pointless insults. Yeah, it's hard to ignore them but focus on him, block them out.
More importantly try this- Get some time to yourself, outside. If there's bad weather find a nice cafe/bar with a window seat. Don't bring your mobile, ipod, book etc. Sit there and really think. Ask yourself if your husband KNOWS that your happiness is as important to him as his own.
Being pretty's rough isn't it! :)

Answer 4

youre MARRIED and he still lives at home? that is ridiculous! you need to cut loose that mamas boy or sisters boy whatever the hell it is. im serious, that is not healthy! if he loves you he'll be with you, what kind of tradition would keep the man (whos married) away from his wife? do you plan to have kids? then what? they only get to see daddy when gma says so? that is sick and wrong! not a tradition! like i said you seriously need to get a divorce! i could go on and on about how WRONG this is! maybe he was having sex with mom and his sisters and you took it away or what there probably really thinking is that they sense that you do not agree with their "tradition", so they want you gone- either way cut the strings QUICK! start by showing him what weve all said!

Answer 5

hi, quite frankly they are jealous you are getting the attention of their brother, and he used go give it all to them, families are the most weird things in my opinion, my mother in law goes from me being the best thing since sliced bread to the worst daughter in law I'm the latter at the moment, as his sister is flavour of the month at the mo, even though it is me that rings her up, me that forces her son to go and visit her, me that listens to her moaning all the time, me that invites her to stay, his brothers never ring us and his sister thinks she is much better than us, they all used to be very nice to me for about the first 5 years together, now we have been together 20 years and at the most we get a christmas card if that, they never bother with my kids but expect me to buy theirs birthdays and christmas, but for the past 6 months or so i have decided im not doing this anymore, let them be petty i just don't care anymore, i'm not worrying if i upset them or not and i'm not forcing my hubby to visit when he doesn't want to, so my advice to you is stop worrying now instead of 20 years down the line like me, as long as you and your man are happy thats all that counts, and if he is not man enough to stand up to his family and defend you is he really the kind of man you want to be with, familys don't need a reason to hate the inlaws they just do, and why does he have to look after his parents because the sisters want their own lives, give him a shake, tell him you have got to come first if you are to have a future together. Hope i havn't offended you, and i hope i've been of some help, good luck you sound like your going to need it.

Answer 6

A little experienced here, you have to ask you're husband doe's he love you. If he says yes then you will have to ask him to stand up for you around his Mum and Sisters.
Also don't have fights around the house when mum is about. Most of all you both need you're own space. I know it might be difficult but don't rise to the occasion if um and sister in law start bitching and walk away.

Answer 7

is the son stays home a custom or is it his family's idea, It sounds like you have taken their meal ticket away from them and they do not know what to do with you. If your husband has this much power in this home ask him to use it and tell his mom and sisters to back off, or he will be living in a new home with just his wife.

Answer 8

i guess that the only solution for u is to tell ur husband that u cant live like this anymore , move out and find another place to live ...things will get worse and at the end even the love of u too will disapear
traditions are great but not if they destroy feelings and relationships

good luck x

Answer 9

the best thing for your hubby and you is to move the heck out of that situation because if you both don't then your marriage doesn't have a chance at all.just because you look good has nothing to do with it at all,and as far as them staring at you at everything you do,they have a problem with it and that is just to darn bad on their part.as for your mother in-law she has issues and she needs to put a sock in her mouth and stay out of your marriage and work on her own and your husband and you need to confront her on being nosy and calling her daughters about your fights with your hubby.she sounds like a little child who likes to be a tattle tail just to get you going.

Answer 10

I say move out of town. They sound wretched. Distance can do wonders. Nevertheless, if you love him you still have to repect them. Don't try to turn him against them. Find your own silence, your own peace, your own happiness, and let your own life be a living example. If he still doesn't see "the light" through your passive resistance, then he may not be the guy for you. The last thing you want to do is be caught up in anyone's drama. That would be counteractive. Remember you CHOOSE to react to them. No one can make you feel badly. IT's your choice.

oh, and ps, by the way.... it's Sisters-in-law, not sister in laws. Sounds weird, I know, but it's gramatically correct. Best of luck.

Answer 11

Tell your hubby to get some balls and keep his mom and sisters in check! If you do it, you will seem like a b*tch! Personally, I would do it anyway because I don't take cr*p from poeple like that. If there's children involved, DO NOT use them as leverage! You will only be hurting them! Just approach your husband about it first and see if he has the cojones to say something to them!