What is a good way to resolve arguements with your boyfriend?

Question

My bf and I have been going out for about 4 months. We both have been under alot of stress lately and ahve been arguing alot. I want to find a positive for us to express our feelings without getting into arguments and getting nowhere. I don't want this to be the end of ourrelationship though. Can somone help?

Answer 1

take the dive. unless its something that you really feel strongly about, i usually just say something like, "hunnie you are right i never thought about it like that, i will try to work on it" quick way to end a fight.

Answer 2

First make sure you are not just arguing just to argue. Meaning are you arguing about major life things or about everything? It is so easy to get in a rut of arguing when you are stressed.

Then remember sometimes you have to agree to disagree....it is THE best advice I have ever gotten! Sounds kind of silly but I use this in my relationship and it works to realize that you are still two different people with different ideas and when arguing is getting you nowhere then you have to use that advice. It is okay for no one to win sometimes.

If it is about major things like money, jealousy/cheating, friends, family etc then you really have to sit down and think about where the relationship is going and if you ultimately want the same things or are you just together because you can't stand the thought of being apart.

And last but not least find a positive way to listen along with expressing yourself. Typically in arguing or heated discussions you are only thinking about your point which is the main reason why it becomes an argument.

Best of luck to you!

Answer 3

Just don't attack each other personally and let your boyfriend know that this is what you are thinking/feeling and that by saying what you think/feel you are expressing your needs/wants and not trying to hurt him or start anything. He should do the same. Make sure you talk it out and don't go to bed mad, and keep the fights/arguments/disagreements between the 2 of you! It is hard enough having a relationship w/ 2 people let alone with everyone meddling in your business and making things 10 times worse!

Answer 4

well i think you figure out a good techinique to end an argument as you guys get to know each other more.
Me and my bf would argue...nothing serious...just one of those arguments. Then we would just stop talking for awhile...like an hr to couple hrs. This gives us some time to cool off and think rationally about what happened. I usually need to resolve arguments right there and then but I learn to just cool off. After I cool off...the things that we argued about seem very silly and I'm no longer mad.
After couple hrs, my bf comes to me and gives me a hug. Of course I do not resist cause I love him and the arguement was just stupid. Then we are back to happy, loving couple!
But finding your own technique to resolve arguments might take some time. Also check out dr. phil's website. He has some advice on ending an arguement.
Here I'll make things easier...here is the link:
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/20
good luck

Answer 5

Just to talk it through calmly - without so much emotion.

I would also ignore the people who are saying that the relationship is almost over,

My bf and I fought alot in the first year of our relationship. But as we loved each other we have now got past that and are both happily in love.
The tone of voice used in discussions makes all the difference if you are too stressed or mad to control your emotions you are best to discuss things when you are both calm enough to do so.

Answer 6

well...A - If it's only been 4 months and you guys are already at each other throats....that's a sign right there. The best way to go about it is to just ask him calmly if you can talk like ADULTS about the problems without getting mad at each other. If he can't talk to you in a calm manner about the problems you guys are having and just blows it off as something stupid. Then more than likely he feels that it's all your fault, and he's done no wrong.


I'm looking into my crystal ball....
it says...
This relationship won't last much longer.
Please insert $0.25 for next years fortune.

Answer 7

Honey if you and your guy have only been going out for 4 months what could yall possibly fight about? Bills? Kids?
Just messing with you. Anyways, try going out on a date like to a concert or to a movie and dinner, plan things out so he is not stressed. If you want to stay with him remember what is important. Or not for that matter. Don't pick fights over stuff that isn't a deal breaker.

Answer 8

I been with my boyfriend for 7 months, so far no arguments, but how can you be in a relationship for 4 months and be arguing all the time.

ARGUING IS JUST A WAIST OF ENERGY!

Answer 9

hiya Jenny you may desire to have slightly have confidence in your self and don't be so based on him. lots of the extra youthful inhabitants is addicted in some thank you to social networks this is a very hardship-loose "concern". yet why did you enter interior the midst of the nighttime after receaving a txt from that guy? Do you care plenty for that chum?. the different ingredient you'll be able to desire to do is think of with regard to the failings he enjoyed approximately you on the commencing up an approximately what you enjoyed approximately him so as which you will understand whats incorrect. do no longer beg him make him guard you lower back, provide him it slow if its nessesary he will then aproach you and communicate of the priority yet in yet another mooth.

Answer 10

when you know you are angry/anouyyed/stressed/etc just let him know that you are in a bad mood, walk out count to ten go for a walk or do something without electronics (as they can influence your mood to get worse) and come back, give some space to him when he is mad also. oh and never sleep/go out/etc on an argument.

Answer 11

try just agreeing with him once in a while or try making him laugh instead of arguing back . I've been married for 5 years and we haven't fought yet.