Accept your pain. Have your good long cries if you feel like it. It's okay to be hurt and feel alone and feel like you have messed up. But you have to know that you are a good person and this is not all one-sided.
Deal with the hate phase. This is where you want to just scream because you are so angry, even furious. The amount of anger you feel all depends on how bad the "split" was. You may even feel like you hate yourself, but get out of that feeling fast! It's a waste of time to be hating and ripping yourself apart for no reason.
Talk to your friends. They are always a source of advice and help. If you are close with any family members, they may be a good source of advice/guidance. You want people around you that love you and who will help you see that you should love yourself too and that you don't need this sort of pain.
You have to walk out of your heartache, knowing that you have done all that you can do, said all that you can say, and given as much as you could give. If you feel all this and that you did your part, but he or she didn't meet you halfway, then you'll be just fine.
Do not put yourself through more pain than you have to. Do not think about where he or she would be right now and if you should visit. Don't try to talk to him or her about the break up. Don't make yourself think negatively about yourself or your judgment, or anything else that will make you doubt your decisions or yourself.
Listen to a song that makes you feel empowered and happy. Do it as often as you need to.
find something constructive to do -- something that will hold your attention and require you to focus and get interested. Once you've spent a few days (or weeks) indulging the grief, it's time to take a class or maybe join a book group. Find something that gets you out of the house and out of your circular thought process and involves your brain or your creative side. Sometimes you've forgotten who you were before you hooked up with the person you're so sad about now, and you need to wake yourself up a bit and remember that you used to have fun doing things you've forgotten about since then.
You can do it without the following items, but they are highly recommended for the most rewarding (yes, really!) experience possible:
---A few shoulders to cry on. It really does help to talk about it, preferably to more than just one person (if only to give your best friend some relief).
---A Teddy Bear (for hugs and to talk to at 4am when everyone else is asleep.) Dogs and cats will do too, although pets may not always give you quite that loving sympathetic gaze and undivided attention that bears are so good at.
---Hot showers (As much as you may not even want to get out of bed, much less get in the shower -- *sniffle* "who cares if I wash my hair now, anyway?" --you WILL feel better after a shower, or a nice long soak in the tub. Hot water relaxes tense muscles, soothes anxiety and refreshes puffy, tear-stained faces.
---Paper and pens (a journal is perfect, paints and glue and other illustration tools, even better!)
---Funny movies and absorbing novels can be a great temporary respite and laughter can really lighten your mood.
---if you're one of the millions who try to fill that empty sad feeling through your mouth (which usually doesn't work because food isn't what you're missing), fill the fridge with celery sticks and other light snacks that you won't regret later if you just have to munch.
---Your sense of humor and your knowledge that "this too shall pass".
---Lots of tissues.
YOU GO GIRL!
2007-02-05 13:16:32
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answer #1
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answered by nk_20 2
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2016-05-08 03:31:39
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answer #2
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answered by ? 3
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Go on a date. They say that's the best thing. It will take your mind off of all this, and maybe put things in perspective.
They also say to do this after you've had a really good date. Same thing, you can see the first more clearly.
We all want to crawl back to the familiar, even if we know it's the wrong thing for us, so you have to get out there and distract yourself.
Even if not a date, plan activites and stay really busy for a few weeks.
You can do it. Good luck.
2007-02-05 13:27:43
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answer #3
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answered by Marie123 3
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TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS, whether scars consistently proceed to be for mirrored image. in my opinion i've got self assurance it is not some thing everyone might desire to ever overlook, simply by fact it is only yet another lesson on your existence to replicate upon... yet to assist cope with the soreness and/or harm: 1st of ALL i've got in my opinion chanced on ALL breakups to be extra straightforward by only making NEW pals whenever you are able to. artwork can help take your techniques off issues. additionally spending time with playful or comforting pets (eg cats, canines, bunny's, rats, horses and so on) only any pets requiring social interest. JIC there's a infant in touch, i'm not specifically asserting you have any) yet in case there is alway remember once you inspect that infant and all you spot is him/her (reckoning on the courting) consistently remember that it is your infant too, which i discover the final focal element to go on, and that way a infant might have a extra sensible probability of averting neglection. something non secular might help, like meditation or starting to be a member of a likeminded group. yet while your emotion is in any way too overbearing you will possibly desire to work out some sort of councellor, to boot it is the in element to maintain a verify on our own psychological stability. the days of embarrassment to work out shrinks is OVER. anybody does it specifically circumstances now besides. i might desire to admit nevertheless those are in basic terms some approaches, that would help, yet unquestionably there are sooo many approaches and it somewhat only relies upon on what works for you :) desire this facilitates in some way. solid success :) P.S. remember my capitals are actually not shouting only improving on what i opt to stand out :)
2016-09-28 11:40:41
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answer #4
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answered by vyky 4
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I used to always get my hair cut, kinda dumb- but it felt like a new beginning. Good luck.
2007-02-05 13:10:18
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answer #5
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answered by live75 3
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try 2 for get ur bf try 2 move on try 2 get a new bf p'z wat did u break up from? who dumped who n watz it all bout write back n tell me on busuttil_rebecca@yahoo.com.au tell me all the goss were do u live i can make friendz with ya i will set ya up with a good bf how old r u wat iz ur number luv ya got 2 go gzg bye!!!
2007-02-05 13:25:27
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answer #6
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answered by BECCA 2
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