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okay, so around june, my best friend and i started going out. i ended it with him in september because he was coming on too strong for me and i felt like i was leading him on. i made it clear during the relationship i wanted to stay friends afterwards, but it was obvious he wasn't into it. now, of all times, i realize how much i miss him and that i still have some feelings left over for him. i heard that he still has strong ones for me, but whenever i try to talk to him, he clams up and gives one-word answers. i wished him happy birthday a few days ago and he just looked away and said "thank you" in this really weird voice. i'd be content just being his friend, but he doesn't seem to want anything to do with me and i'm always losing the nerve to talk to him! what do i do??

2007-02-05 11:20:43 · 16 answers · asked by lajolla_x3 2 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

16 answers

Call him up and tell him that you still consider him a friend and you miss having him around. You breaking up with him because you felt you were leading him on was the right thing to do. You didn't want to wait till he was to serious. I can commend you for that. He sounds like a little boy who is pouting because he didn't get his way. I think you should tell him how you feel and if he is still mad and not willing to work on it then you are better off without him.

2007-02-05 11:29:30 · answer #1 · answered by Tim VP 3 · 0 2

I've often heard of similar scenarios and read about similar scenarios. The problem with taking the big step from being good friends to something deeper is that if things don't work out, that friendship is rarely ever mended because deep feelings have been hurt. But, that's just from my observations. Though, like the saying goes, time heals all wounds, so give him some space and if you two were really good friends then he should come back around. Just don't go hot and heavy in an effort to get him back as a friend.

2007-02-05 11:27:05 · answer #2 · answered by xenonwarrior8 1 · 0 0

Accept it. You screwed him over and now all you care about is what you want, what you are missing out on. He doesn't need someone like that in his life, because by being that way you can't even be his friend, because friends genuinely care about the other person and not just about what they are getting from that person. Too bad. You should have kept him as your boyfriend when you had the chance.

2007-02-05 11:27:52 · answer #3 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 1 0

Don't give up. I'd tell you to move on, but I wouldn't give advice that I wouldn't be able to follow myself. I go out with the guy that was my best friend too, and if that happened to me, it would be too hard to just "move on". So what I suggest is to try to get him by himself one day and try to talk to him. Tell him : "Look, if you don't want to be with me, that's fine. But I want back that old friendship because I miss it so much. I want us to be able to talk like we used to." Or whatever you really want to say to him. I just put what I would say. But really make it clear that you still care to be his friend and tell him what you're saying in this question. That you miss him. I'm sure he misses you too but guys are a little proud and aren't too likely to do that to someone. So just let him know and tell him to think it through. Leave him alone about it for a few days and come back to it later. Maybe he'll talk to you before you talk to him. But if he doesn't, ask him if he's thought about what he wants. And I'm sure that he'll realize he does want you. :]
I hope the best for you!

2007-02-05 11:27:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

pay attention, you have gotten many loves in case you have not chanced on the marvelous one. I definitely have had 2 genuine loves in my existence and that i'm 31. the two relationships failed. the 1st, simply by fact he grew to become into irresponsible and in no way have been given a job. the 2d simply by fact he grew to become into very extreme of me. If this guy replaced so all of sudden you will possibly desire to only permit issues take their organic course. assure he will call you this week. They consistently do. yet remember, in no way feel embarrassment approximately what you think of and what you be attentive to is powerful. Your ideals are your ideals. You in no way might desire to describe that to everyone. they won't understand yet to interrupt up with you and go away you only like that... exhibits that he grew to become into illiberal consistent with probability to a pair issues which you have self assurance in. Relationships are approximately compromise and consistent with probability he will comprehend that its not a interest.. he needs to step lower back and comprehend which you have your guy or woman techniques and ideas and he might desire to understand that. If he loves you he will no remember what and make it artwork no remember what. solid success...

2016-09-28 11:34:29 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

well how long did u know this guy
well to me that once u in a relationship with a guy ..its really hard for a guy to be a friend with a person u dated and he probably doesnt want to hurt your feelings at all ...all u gotta do is sit down with him n just talk it out n say how u feel about him n u ask him the same question about how he feel about u n so on ok see wut happens ok

2007-02-05 11:28:54 · answer #6 · answered by asian senorial 3 · 0 0

Well, you probably really hurt him when you broke it off with him. It is probably too hard on him to keep being friends. It is easier to move on if you cut off contact. You have to accept the fact that you are asking too much of him to be friends now.

2007-02-05 11:24:15 · answer #7 · answered by zyllee 5 · 1 0

You just need to talk to him. Be completely honest and say "I miss you, I miss our friendship". He probably misses it too but just doesn't know how to approach you about it... Maybe he is trying to give you space bc you broke up with him. You guys can get past this, but it weill require one of you biting the bullet and jsut being honest and candid about it.

Good Luck!!

2007-02-05 11:27:23 · answer #8 · answered by Heart of Gold 3 · 0 0

Guys typically don't want to be friends after a break up. I never do. It's normal. Start meeting other guys.

2007-02-05 11:25:23 · answer #9 · answered by skidrowdan 5 · 1 0

There isn't much you can do. As the dumper and not the dumpee, there is no sympathy. You need to keep doing what you are doing, and of that doesn't work, simply move on.

2007-02-05 11:25:09 · answer #10 · answered by um... 2 · 1 0

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