grandpa just passed away....???

Question

my grandpa just passed away about three hours ago. my mom was on a buisness trip and she just called saying she was coming home. when i asked why she started crying and said that grandpa passed.

i dunno why im not crying. i feel bad but i usually cry about a lot of stuff. but everythings gonna change now. my grandma is moving in with us. we dont know if we can pay for the funeral...its all so terribble.

i dunno what to do. how much do funerals cost in general?

im so sad. why arent i crying?

someone help please!!!

Answer 1

1. No idea how much a funeral may cost.

2. You aren't crying because you had little emotional attachment to them, or not enough to have an impact that will make you sad and cry.

Answer 2

Not everybody cries right away. I tend to not cry, but there have been times when I cried like a baby, (those times are very very few and far between).
I have also wondered why I haven't cried in some circumstnces, but I think these days TV and society has hardened us in some ways. Don't worry about what the outward effect is (whether you're crying or not), just be yourself and deal with your feelings as they come. Things will get better.
It's sad that funerals cost as much as they do. I think the people in that industry are ripping off people when they are the most vulnerable. Of course nobody wants the "economy, El Cheapo cardboard casket from the dollar store" option for their loved ones, so they take advantage of that. Unfortunatelly there aren't that many people in that industry to create some competition to drive prices down.

Answer 3

Because you feel that you lost someone you loved and now your worried that your not going give him a proper funeral. Funerals are seen as a way to respect the passed loved ones and for the those whom loved him. The cost 5-10 grand on the low end. That is what my family paid when Grandpa died and his plot was already paid for. It's normal to cry and feel sad. I was blessed when my Grandpa died it was peaceful and fast. Yet I'm now dealing with his wife my Grandma dieing and having a harder time with it because of the pain she is in and knowing that the call could come any day now.

Answer 4

I am very sorry to hear your Grandpa passed away. Don't be alarmed that you are not crying, sometimes our minds just haven't accepted the fact. You may be overwhelmed with all the things that are going on, your concern for your mom and Granny. Maybe Grandpa had an insurance policy that may help pay for the funeral. I am sure the funeral director, will help in any way he can. Funerals don't have to be elaborate and it does not reflect on the love you feel for the deceased if you can't have an expensive affair. God Bless and I'll pray that God helps your family.

Answer 5

If I may be so bold... *offers a huge cyber hug* I am so sorry to hear about your loss.

As a musician, I've worked with a lot of grieving families and something I've learned is that there is no "one" or "right" way to grieve. So people can't stop crying for days while others don't finally shed tears until a month after the death. Do not let ANYONE tell you how you should feel or act or whatever. Be honest with yourself and be gentle with yourself.

Answer 6

I'm so sorry to hear you lost someone you love.

You aren't crying because you're still in shock. It still has that air of "this can't be real" around it.

My mom's funeral cost about $10 000. You'll figure things out.

You'll feel better. The funeral will help but the only thing that can make you feel truly better is time.

Answer 7

It is funny just now I found out that somebody in my family just passed away too. So, I feel for you.

One year I had gone to four funerals...some close family members, and others friends. I did not cry at any of those. Later my cat died. I loved my cat so much, he lived with me for years, and we shared good times and bad times together. I cried so much for my cat, and shed no tears for my friends and family.

I thought about it for awhile and I decided that my cat loved me in good times and bad, and sure my family and friends cared about me, we did not connect on that level that I did with my cat.

It seems that we spend a lot of money for funerals. The industry tends to get that dollar based upon sympathy.

Let me be creamated when I die, so as to not burden my family with that expense, and instead of a fancy coffin, have a great party in my rememberance.

Do not feel guilty for not crying. But you should acknowlge what the loss of grandpa means to you, and remember the good times you had together.

That is all that he asks.

Answer 8

Maybe you and your grandfather were not close.Funerals cost at least about $5,000 but life insurance usually covers it,and the funeral director usually makes you sign a paper staking claim to a part of the life insurance policy,or a promise to pay withing a certain time limit.
That is the least of everyone's worries really. How are you going to deal with your grandmother moving in with you. Perhaps you can form a bond with her when she moves in,you should try to be close to your grandparents they are not around forever,and you already lost at least one grandparent .
Maybe it will take a while to seek in that he is gone ,that's why you don't feel anything yet.

Answer 9

Sorry to hear about your loss. I hope you have many happy memories to cherish.

Following are the 4 stages of grief. Sounds like you're at #1:

1. Shock: Feeling numb. You may wake up wondering, "Is this real?"

2. Denial: Being unable to accept the situation. You may find yourself thinking, "This can't be happening. It's not real."

3. Anger: Wanting to lash out at everyone. You may continually ask, "How can this happen?"

4. Resolution: Feeling like there is a way past the grief, an end to the sadness. You may say to yourself, "I will get through this."

Answer 10

Sorry to read about your loss and pain.
Funerals can cost several thousands of dollars.
Cremation is cheaper, if that is an option.
As for not crying... give ourself some time.
Everyone reacts differently.
Some let go right off, and others hold out until later.
Depends on the relationship you had as well.
I hope and pray for your family,
that you all find peace and comfort through this time.
May God bless you.