How do you deal with your daughter when BF family doesn't like yours?

Question

We welcomed him into the house. We even through him a birthday party. She has betrayed us on so many levels, how do I trust her when she blames anything and everything on her family. She moved out of our home because she said she was unappriciated, I didn't say thank you enough. The BF family were filling her head with all of this anti-your family info for months with out us knowing. What do I do?

Answer 1

Depends on how old your daughter is.. If she's still a teenager, then it's her own problem,but you need to try counseling, for her and you and your family.

If she's not a teenager anymore (as in 18 or older), she needs to get over it herself and grow up, because frankly, YOU are the one who deserves the thank yous, NOT her.

Answer 2

It seems to me that if you guys got into this situation is because your communication is off. You better sit down and talk to her. Before you do that be clear on the points you want to discuss. Relax and calm down. Explain to her your point of view, or how you feel whenever she does X, and how you would like her to behave when you do X. Be honest, be a good listener. Sometimes we hear things that it may hurt us but remember it may help you to improve yourself too. Plus remember that the other person is opening and venting. Accept the difference if any and get into a mutual agreement as to how to deal and improve those differences. For instance: You can start saying that it hurts you when she walks away while you're talking to her. It will make you happy if she looks at you and listen to your words. You need to bound with her again and win trust with each other that may take some time. But be consistent with your promises be the example. Keep your word. Be patient. Show her that you are a friend who is looking for her best. Hope this help and that things get better

Answer 3

it is such a pity that we get comments from idiots alongside with HellF, he might desire to have a depressing existence. in case you opt to have your infant Baptised, then it rather is your decision. As you're saying, the newborn can exchange it is techniques at a later date if it is so. I definitely have considered many an argument while a infant is being Baptised, and have considered might family individuals asked to go away at the same time as the Baptism grew to become into being carried out simply by fact of their lack of information and stupidly at such a eye-catching time in a childes existence. i'm not for, nor am I against Baptism, i've got self assurance that it is as much as the newborn's determine's again to a determination on the time. Discussions with family individuals can and does help at cases, yet as quickly as we arise against themes such as you have, the only sane way is to tell them that they the two assist you of their determination, or they don't. in the event that they do, then please attend and provide help, if not, then please do not attend. do not enable them to break your particular social gathering. AS for the ingesting and comments. i could recommend which you're making regulations that anybody who's under the impact of alcohol and/or drugs heavily isn't allowed on the Baptism. that's then their decision in the event that they arrive or not. they are able to't blame you afterwards by asserting which you probably did not invite them, they desperate to overlook approximately your demands and that's it. Make regulations, and tell them that that's a undeniable social gathering for the mothers and dads and the newborn, and that in the event that they opt to share this with you, then you could like them again alongside and participate, yet once you have any dis-agreements approximately this, then please stay away on the day. advantages. i will pray that all people is going nicely. Rev JackM

Answer 4

Sorry, there's nothing you can do. Some people just have to learn the hard way. I'm kind of hard nosed when it comes to letting people get away with this behavior. You want your daughter back, want a relationship with her, but do you want to deal with all her drama? You had her for years. Hasn't she always been a drama queen? She'll have to decide what's right for herself, and all you can do is be there for her. Hopefully she'll learn that maybe bf isn't always right. You wouldn't put up with this from a child, and that's what she's acting like. I'd tell her this in so many words too. Do not reward her with whinning, crying, and asking her back. That's what she's looking for. I wish you luck.

Answer 5

Just be there when she needs you. Eventually she will leave the relationship if they start in on her. If she is old enough to be on her own give her some space for a while and just call to ask how she is doing, would you like to go to lunch and don't bring up his family let her figure it out on her own. Basically keep the lines of communication open.

Answer 6

There's no pain in this world like that a parent goes thru with their child. Obviously your daughter is of age (since she is on her own), it's important that you resist the temptation to get into a "mud slinging" contest with your daughter or the b/f. This will only polarize her feelings towards the bf. It feels as if there's no way to get our girls out of a situation like this, & to a certain degree that is true - we can't get them out of it, they have to realize for themselves. That's what is so hard for us parents, b/c from the beginning of our children's lives we have been able to fix their problems, kiss the booboos away, we've been the hero, the fixer, the one they turned too with everything - then when we are tossed aside for bf's it's almost too much ......When you do get a chance to see or talk with your daughter, just keep telling her how much you love her, remind her of good times with the family, (but not in an accusatory, ugly way), on special occassions have photo's enlarged & framed for her of a special time with the family, things that bring to the forefront of her mind all the good times with her family, all that you all have meant to each other.......Over time she'll realize that the price is too high to be with this bf....b/c the price she's being asked to pay is to give up her family......... Slowly, you'll get your daughter back.....continue to remind her that true love doesn't ask you to sacrifice the love & support of your family in order to have it. True love adds a new dimension to both your lives, it doesn't remove or exclude.

Answer 7

be there for her when she needs you ,because she will need you sooner or later weather she knows it or not . just go n with your life and let her know you are still there for her when she needs you .