Why do men/guys ask for a phone number and never call?

Question

It seems that when there is mutual attraction and a fellow ASKS for my phone number (even enters it in the cell) I never hear from him again. Why bother to ask? Also is there an unwritten rule about how long to wait if one really intends to call? I haven't dated in years and don't readily give out my number. I think I must not know the 2007 dating guidelines... Fellows, please advise this puzzled lady (age 34). Thanks.

Answer 1

I don't do this myself but when I go out with my friends to a bar/lounge/club they will see how many phone numbers they can collect. They think of it as a game or challenge or may even do it as practice.

But don't put the total blame on guys as women do this as well. Sometimes it's fun to just get the attention of the opposite sex...like a game and as you progress you move on to the next challenge (such as trying to approach someone more attractive). This usually occurs in fast pace environments like bars or clubs...However, if you're 34 i think the men you meet should be more mature than to play this type of game.

Also it might be that if you easily give you your contact the guy will think 'she gives out her contact too easily and gives it to any guy that asks her' so you have to play it hard to get. However, the bad part in playing it hard to get is you may turn away the genuine guys that are nice and respect that you've turned them down....while at the same time you attract the sharks that like the chase and pursue you even further. Just use good judgement and i'm sure you will know when a guy has true intentions to call you up.

The general rule is 2 or 3 days to call so you don't seem overly desperate to call them the next day. But some also say it's good to call the next day so you are still fresh on their mind. It also may depend on what day of the week. If i met a girl over the weekend I'd call on a tues or wednesday to see if she'd be interested to go out on the weekend. Good luck!

Answer 2

I'd say 5 days is the limit.
Often guys are shy but why not ask them for there's and tell them you don't just give it out to anyone.
If there is a concern, give them an email address (like a yahoo that you set up specifically for that purpose.
The dating scene is the same at 20-30 or even 50.

It's difficult finding a relation, most people are into one night stands. Perhaps these guys you meet are being polite or just going through the motions falsly pretending to be interested.

Night clubs are not the best way to finding Mr Right but you will find a lot of Mr Right Now's out there.
Good luck and happy hunting

Answer 3

It's common and I don't realy know why they do it. They weren't really interested. Easier to grab your number than to tell you they're not interested. They met someone better. Could be a whole slew of reasons. If you have their number, you should call them. I don't know about an unwritten rule, but if they only have my number, they call or they don't. I don't worry about it. If they don't then I never wasted my time on them. When you are dating, it's common to get a lot of blow offs unfortunately. It never used to happen when I was dating before years ago. Things have changed. Just try not to let it get to you. They aren't worth worrying about if they can't even pick up a phone or tell you they aren't interested.

Answer 4

I'm not a guy but I think they're just asking for your number to see if they can actually get it. It's like a self-administered "still got it" test. Half of these guys have girlfriends.

You should try this... tell them that you don't give your number out but you will take his. That way you become the one in control and you can decide whether you really want to or not. Only call the ones that really caught your attention.

Good Luck!

Answer 5

I've asked for numbers and called later, and I usually get an incredulous "Oh my god I can't believe you actually called, you idiot" kind of attitude on the other end.

Why don't women call back after they've been called? Why do women give out their numbers if they don't want to be called?

I don't even ask anymore. I just try to run into them on purpose. Women don't know what they want, and neither do men. We're all so afraid of telling people we are attracted to them, it's a wonder ANYONE is together.

Answer 6

Lots of guys like to make you think they are interested but they only want one thing. They put your number in their cell phones incase they ever "need" someone so they can call and maybe get lucky. If I give a guy my number and more then a week goes by, I don't bother with him anymore. If he was out of town he could still call to say hello if he were truely interested. Give em a week and then say bye.

Answer 7

Guys are weird rather they like you at the moment and they get your number and then they find something better so they continue or guys just like to be able to score a number. Some guys are shy and do not know what to say when they call. Hey remember me from the club? They kinda feel weird. If he gives you his number why don;t you call him?

Answer 8

I've done it once and I regret it. I am shy and just thought the girl was being nice and giving me her number and I didn't really stand a chance with her. So I kept putting off and by the time I was going to call I figured she wouldn't remember me anyway.

Answer 9

Guys ask for numbers, then they decide if they like the girl enough. If they do, they call her. If not, then they don't. If he really likes you, then he'll set up a date when he meets you. To get updated, read "He's Just Not That Into You" by Greg Beherendt. That may help (I'm 23 and it worked wonders for me!).

Answer 10

One of those mysteries of life lol, Youd think after going through the effort to ask you'd make the effort. But I give it maybe a week and thats the end of that.