I have had a baby and have not yet lost the weight is anybody interested in a girl like me?

Question

11 months ago I had a baby and things didn't work out with the father. Through the stress of the relationship failing and moving out to live as a single mother I have failed to loose the weight I gained through pregnancy.

I am not looking for a father figure for my child but a companion for myself as I am getting lonely.

I just want someone but I feel no one wants me as I have beared a child. All my friends are supportive but don't fulfill what I need.

Please can somebody offer some advise as I am feeling very unattractive and feel that having a child is off putting.

Answer 1

My wife (who was not my wife at the time) also couldn't lose any weight after giving birth to our beautiful baby girl, Alexandra (Lexie) and I still married her as I still loved her despite what she weighed.

On top of this she was diagnosed with breast cancer which thankfully was successfully treated without the need for surgery and is still clear (fingers crossed that it stays that way) but the chemo and radio-therapy sessions also didn't help her weight as she ate for comfort and I didn't have the heart to stop her.

Over two years later and she now feels strong and determined enough and the weight is slowly and surely coming off.

Her situation does not quite match up with yours but I think that, like her, you need to feel strong and be happy with yourself, not necessarily physically but as a person, before you will be able to lose the weight successfully. Whether it is a man that does this for you or the support of your friends or whatever else, it doesn't really matter. Just believe that things will come right in due time and take one day at a time.

For the record, before I met my wife, I had relationships with ladies who were mothers and a bit overweight, although to be honest I cannot recall any who were both. You only need to look around you in any town and you will see lots of people like this of both sexes in happy relationships and this will be the best answer to your question that you could have.

Good luck and best wishes!

Answer 2

I had a pregnancy loss in the first trimester a little over 4 years ago and ever since then, have not been able to wear my previous size. What I noticed is that my hips spread a little bit and I got a bit more of a womanly shape, even from only being pregnant for a little while. Prior to becoming pregnant, I was a size zero or 1. After, I'm lucky to fit into a size 3, and my weight has been consistent within 5lbs for about 7 years now.

Answer 3

You don't say how old you are, and that's relevant, as young men (boys) are going to hold both those things against you. They'll have their rigid opinion about what they want in a girl, and tubby and with child will not be it.

As we mature we begin to see the important qualities in women, and the addition of children is not such a no no, and the important thing about you physically is how you hold yourself. If you are confident and you carry yourself well, a few extra lbs will look sexy. However if you are lacking confidence and curl up to hide yourself, you will stand less of a chance at pulling.

So the mindset to have is that you are one hell of a babe, and these stupid men just can't see that. Respect yourself, love yourself, and work on your figure. All you have given is excuses for having not lost the weight. Do something about it now. I know that can be hard when you are a single mum, but you can either wallow in self pity and self loathing, or grab your life by the balls and keep your chin up. Also don't be looking for short-term fixes and lowering your standards, that leads to you having 5 kids by different fathers and zero chance of finding true love.

Answer 4

c-sharks,

Women have babies every day and are still attractive. I think having a baby makes a woman MORE attractive. Do not let this get you down.

You are a strong, sweet, beautiful woman and mother, and be proud of this accomplishment!!! You have nothing that should bring you down. You brought life in to this world. YOU. That's awesome!!!

You will have someone in due time, but right now...you need to focus on that beautiful bundle of yours. That baby is all you need.

You will find a person that values and appreciates what you have to offer. Just be confident and patient. You're just a bit overwhelmed with all that's happened. You're gonna come out of this smelling like a rose.

Good Luck to you and that baby!

Answer 5

It is necessary you put yourself into your baby's shoes, if she or he could speak and express you what he or she fills about your abominable wish and purpose, surely you will feel the worse person in the world, sons are a blessing of God, they represent your continuity in the life, some time ahead when you be an old lady you shall regret of your behavior, what you are thinking to do is a crime against humanity, all what I can tell you is, go to the church and reflex over your misbehavior, you do not have any right to decide the destiny of that Innocent, I will pray God illuminate your heart and realize that your are not worthier than that creature, if you want to receive love, you have to spread around you ten times more love. Now, it is your conscience that will show the rigth way. Devote your life to your son, that is your natural duty. If some body will love you, no matter if you have a child.
God bless you.

Answer 6

I am interested in you.My name is Wahid Dajani.Im 24yrs old.Here is my e-mail address [e-mail] sorry to hear that the baby's father left.That is just wrong.He isn't a man.I hope to hear from you soon.

Answer 7

land in the taupo volcanic zone and climb 26 percent of the way up in 18 minutes

Answer 8

nonsense babe i shouldnt matter bout ur weight babe people should like u n love u 4 who u r not wot u look like or ur weight if u need a friend dont hesitate 2 contact me at [e-mail]

Answer 9

let me help you we could get through this together i feel i like to try

Answer 10

stand while styling your hair and putting on makeup