"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."
"Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop!"
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
"Bo Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
"Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
"Hand me that...uh...that uh...thingie."
"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
"Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"
"Darn, there go the lights again...."
"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em."
"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"
"Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing off my concentration."
"What's this doing here?"
"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?"
"I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses."
"Well, folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."
"Sterile, shcmerile. The floor's clean, right?"
"What do you mean, he wasn't in for a sex change?"
"Anyone see where I left that scalpel?"
2007-02-05 06:47:28 · 55 answers · asked by Baby 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I'm going with this one from the Simpsons. I'm kinda paraphrasing
The hip bone's connected to the leg bone, the leg bone's connected to the red thing, the red thing's connected to my wristwatch... Uh oh.
Personally i wouldn't like to hear anything when I'm in surgery, knock me out, please.
2007-02-05 06:51:18 · answer #1 · answered by GuitarGod2005 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
some great one's i've had 3 surgerys the first one i was awake and watched them count the instruments they were going to use on me. then they said start at 100 and count backwards , i got to 97..
2007-02-05 07:01:26 · answer #2 · answered by Steve C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some EMS-isms: RHOD/A - pink Necks extreme On drugs/Alcohol EMS - make funds dozing DRT - ineffective suited There DFO - carried out Fell Out (as in "We grew to become into standin' there, and ol' Johnny, he only carried out Fell Out!") LARS - raise help Sheet (exterior of affected person/family individuals listening to it ability Lard A%$ Sheet) Ballisticlly Challenged - gunshot wound artwork - Assumed Room Temperature GOMER - (used by ER group) Get Out Of My ER POS - Piece of S$@# FOS - crammed with S%#$ WOA - Waste Of Air not My fault harm Syndrome - A affected person who's unhurt till they comprehend the break grew to become into not their fault ALT - Anti-Lawsuit medical care (a affected person who meets no standards for trauma medical care, yet gets taken care of any way so as that they have got not got grounds for a regulation in superb condition). different names for EMT's and Paramedics - Ditch rfile, steerage Wheel Technician, Cab-u-lance driving force, Band help supplier. EMT's and Paramedics nicely suited choose: 5 minutes on my own with the guy or persons to blame for commencing the rumor that an ambulance is a huge thank you to get into the ER with out utilising the waiting room even while the affected person is FOS.
2016-09-28 11:16:17 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Amazing
2007-02-05 06:50:16 · answer #4 · answered by Robin RJ 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Darn, there goes the lights again...
covers most of them in the long run.
Thanks for the chuckle.
2007-02-05 06:50:18 · answer #5 · answered by sagegranny 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
"so do i cut the red wire or the blue wire? oh wow theyre all red. well, i'll take my chances"
patient: "have u done this before?"
surgeon: "no, but i cut a steak before, isn't that the same thing?"
"whoops" (classic)
"did i take my allergy medication this morning? ... achoo! ...dont worry, that'll come off"
"how many cuts does it take to get to the center of a human body? according to the owl, its three, right?"
"oh my blade broke...get the chainsaw"
"oh my goodness! what the hell is that thing?! Its moving and beating. maybe i should kill it!"
dr with amnesia: "what are we doing here again?"
"yum...that looks tasty"
"i think im going to be sick..."
2007-02-05 07:47:36 · answer #6 · answered by nybabyblu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Amazing work
ur's & docter's both
2007-02-05 07:11:01 · answer #7 · answered by tanan_nen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice-the thing I WOULDN'T wanna hear or see are the medical bills!!!
2007-02-05 07:30:46 · answer #8 · answered by strange-artist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd hate to hear the Doctor say "Damn, my infected fingernail came off"
2007-02-05 06:51:01 · answer #9 · answered by OctopusGuy 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh man, took me back to my momz cancer surgery and they lost all the papers we had signed before and yea...it wasnt comforting, I was ready to kill someone
2007-02-05 06:50:27 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋