What's wrong with me ? Please answer?

Question

I'm only 15 and I've got a great crowd of friends but I don't like getting particularly close to them. When I'm invited out I make excuses to not go. I don't really get on with my parents and we argue alot. I've got a older brother and we don't speak. My sister died and so did my grandparents. I've tried councelling but I don't feel comfortable around people I don't know. I'm good at school but have no interest in it, so I do nothing while I'm there. I've been doing self harm for about a year and I'm sick of it. I also drink and take drugs. Please help me, I'm finding it hard to see past this point of my life - I'm pritty desperate !

Answer 1

You sound like me @ 15. You can do it! You need professional assistance, but you already know that. You're smart. Sometimes intellligence is a burden because it becomes too easy to SEEM okay. It is preposterous, but nobody assumes the smart ones are just as crazy, if not usually more so, than the rest of the population. I don't know the specifics of your illness, but I had/have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), and I found DBT (Dialectal Behavioral Therapy) to be helpful. Really, after years of self-injurious and suicidal behavior, it was the only thing that helped... well, meds too, but if you want to talk further, e-mail me. I'd be more than happy to help, and sometimes someone who speaks from experience is easier to talk to. Best of luck! You can do this.

Answer 2

You need to break this cycle of self destructive behavior, you should really see a doctor for some anxiety medications and depressants. Losing a sibling, sister can be devastating.....So can losing a daughter. Your parents are in the same pain as you are. You are probably withdrawing from friends and family due to the pain of losing your sister. Drinking and drug use will only wind you up in trouble, jail or worse, death. You have your whole life ahead of you. High school years are some of the best years. Graduation. Falling in Love. Having children of your own. You career choice, could be cut short because of your use of drugs and alcohol. Don't make this BIG mistake with your life. Soon you will be in high school, find a good friend someone that you can talk to. Did you and your family live in this same home when you lost your sister? If so, ask your parents if its possible to sell the home and move, due to the pain being linked to this home. Everyone needs a fresh start. Believe it or not, your parents do have your best interest at heart. They are not there to make your life a living hell. Try to open up to them, so that they know how much pain that you are in, they are in pain too. Good Luck

Answer 3

As a young man, it was a very difficult time trying to understand life. Friends betrayed me, women hurt me and I was prone to follow the lead of the crowd, all before I turned 18 these things happened. Looking back, it was a mess. Nonetheless, you are not alone. What is happening is the lack of understanding of what life is all about. its not just school, its not just friends, there is a depth to life that you, if you can find these words believeable, that only GOD can provide you with. Do not hurt yourself any longer young lady, for life is a precious thing, and while you are here, there is so much for you to learn. its not bad to shun certain peers, but right now it is best that you seek the school counselor, and maybe even just walk into the local church and take to the pastor, he will always welcome you. Even then always check with others what you are told, and never completely give your trust to anybody at this time, not until you understand what the value of trusting others. It will be fine for you, just do not close your mind to the help that you receive. No other child can give you what you need, you need adult guidance, and if you believe in GOD, please understand that your prayers come to the top of the list.

Answer 4

I think you're just having a hard time trusting people. (Which is totally okay.) I mean, it seems like growing up you've probably had a lot of problems and family conflict. It would be unreasonable to expect you to not have any issues of your own. Maybe you don't feel comfortable around counselors because you can sense their insincerity. Either way, it's important for you to think about your future even if your life seems hopeless. Just try to think about how if you work hard for yourself now, your life will only get better later on.

I'm sorry if this doesn't help you but, I've only given you the advice I gave myself when I was in your place. I hope you get better because you can still enjoy life. :)

Answer 5

It sounds as if you fear getting close to people because you might lose them one day, just like your sister and your grandparents. Your attempting to build a barrier by doing self harm and isolating yourself. Please believe that this is not the type of life you sister and grandparents would wants to see you live if they were here. Remember that you are valuable and you are on this planet for a reason. Find someone you can confide in about these problems and get help to address them. I think you will do fine because you have actually identified your problem and your willing to make a change. Good Luck.

Answer 6

You should talk to someone that you are comfotable with.Keeping problems to yourself is very destructive.You don't have to talk to all of your friends or family but consider talking to one or two of them that you're most familiar with.You cannot go this alone,and I think you will find that once you get the courage to finally talk to someone,it will get a little easier each time.don't give up on yourself,at 15 years old,you have plenty of time to figure life out.Don't be so hard on yourself,we all have confusing issues in life to try to figure out and we don't always make the right choices or take the right path.
We all get better as time goes on and we experience more of life.Finish school because you will need that diploma.Trust me when I tell you that it is easier to do it now.Forget hurting yourself,you havn't done anything wrong to deserve doing that! Forget the drinking and drugs because the issues will still be there when you sober up.You need to have a positive attitude about yourself before you can be positive about other things.You have a bright future,but you have to choose that future,life is all about what you can do with it,not what has happened in the past.Just remember to build on the positive things in you're life and don't dwell on the negative.Positive energy attracts positive energy...Keep your head held high,and good luck.....By the looks of the answers here,I'm not the only one who cares.................

Answer 7

Try the counseling again. Just go to a different one. It could be you just didn't click with that particular person. Not all counselors are alike - - - - some are easy to be with and talk to. Sounds like you suffer depression. Lack of motivation is one clue. The drinking and drugs is another - - - - you are subconsciously seeking relief from these things and it won't help you. Tell your parents you are willing to try counseling again - - - and stick with it for awhile. Depression isn't cured overnight. It takes months, and even longer.

Answer 8

Hello,
It sounds like you might be experiencing some sort of depression or other type of mental pain.
Depression affects people in many ways... it can make you feel isolated (feeling alone) and unable to love people, it can make you feel generally bad about yourself and sad, and you lose interest in everything.
When your sister died, were you very close to her? it could be that you are now worried about letting people get close to you because you have experienced losing somebody who was close to you and you felt so much pain that you are protecting yourself from further pain. It sounds like you have alot of pain in your life and this is expressed through cutting yourself. You may be taking the drink and drugs to help numb the pain. It sounds like you may not have not come to terms with losing your sister, you might find it helpful to talk to somebody about how you feel, or to get a book on grief to read.
I would recomend that you dont go through this experience alone... you have already taken a first brave step and reached out for help by posting this question... there are many ways to seek help.... you can phone a help line which is more annomymous (they wont be able to see you), or you could go to your doctor and ask for some councelling again, or help with the depression.

If you are suffering from depression then it needs to be treated so that you can deal with all of the other issues in your life. If you are depressed then you will not be able to deal with anything else.

i recomend that you go and see your doctor as soon as possible and tell him/her that you think you might be suffering from depression.

In the UK we have the 'samaritans', you can phone them 24 hours a day and talk about any problem at all. No problem is too small or too big for them to help you with. They could point you in the direction to get the help that you thing you need. They are lovely people - very kind and caring and they listen.

So in brief:
1. please dont go through this alone, there are so many lovely people out there who can help you.
2. i would recomend you see your doctor as soon as possible and talk about how you are feeling (say if you think you are feeling depressed because that will help the doctor help you more quickly)
3. talk to someone... anyone you think that you can trust... it could be either on the internet or by phone, or talk to a friend or a family member.
4. go to the samaritans website www.samaritans.org (i'm sure other countries have similar people that you can phone - do an internet search for 'emotional support'). You can email them or phone them and ask them anything, or just tell them how you are feeling. I have used their service when i was going through a bad patch and they are brilliant... they dont judge anyone or tell you what you 'should' do... they do listen alot and can point you in the right direction to seek some support.
5. feel free to email me if you would like any further help

ok, good luck,
take care of yourself and remember that alot of people love you very much

Answer 9

Hi, I think that if you REALLY want to change you have to make an effort, everything at the beginning is hard but then it comes easy, and will convert into an habit.

Try to be nice, try to get close to people, you dont have to get that annoying close, just a little bit, try not to argue. YOU are the only one in charge of YOUR life, and you can decide what you want and what reactions you'll get from people. ..

I know its hard but if you really want to do it you'll be able to. And I also know that you may fail, and you'll get tired, but, dear, this is life,and you've to forgive yourself when you fail...

Answer 10

Well, sorry to say, you sound like you are in deep water and will need help to get out. I'd put my faith in a good therapist if I were you. Yes, it's difficult getting to know them, but once you do, what a relief they are.

Bravo to you for reaching out.