HELP going crazy at meal times?

Question

My 3 year old daughter is a very slow eater if she eats. Meal times become crazy and I end up shouting and threatening. i have tried the reward method either emotionally or buying her something, I have bought charts with gold stars, I have even shown her in ER series people who do n ot eat end up in hospitals but she is so stubborn. Hopw do i get her to eat fast and EAT in the first place. She does favor some few foods adn eats them realtively okay. She is healthy but petite around 92 cm and 28 pounds and she is 3 years 9 months. ANy advice .

Answer 1

Children have very little that they can control in their lives and many discover that they have a lot of control when it comes to food. No matter what you say or do, you will not be able to make her eat nor will you ever be able to make her eat fast. What you can do is take the battle out of meal/snack time. Offer her breakfast, let her choose to eat what she wants and as much of it as she wants. If she doesn't eat, don't ever beg, plead, threaten, promise rewards, or yell. Simply remove her and the food from the table after an appropriate length of time. You can either offer her the same food or something else a couple hours later at a set snack time. Again, serve healthy choices, let her choose what and how much she eats. Again no eating? Take her and the food away from the table until lunch. Offer an afternoon snack then dinner. An evening snack can be offered, especially if she has a pretty late bedtime. Children will not starve themselves. If timing is an issue, give her a reasonable amount of time to eat, say 1/2 hour. Give her a warning at 25 minutes that she has 5 more minutes to finish and then lunch time is over. If she begins playing around before that time frame passes then tell her that she needs to eat or get down. Your goal is not to make her eat, your goal is to offer her healthy food choices and let her choose. Set the meal/snack schedule and stick with it. Cut out her juice consumption or limit it to 4 ounces per day served with a meal or snack. Many little ones walk around all day with a sippy cup of juice. Even 100% juice has a large sugar content and fills up tiny tummies. Enlist her help when you prepare food. She can wash fruits and vegetables standing on a stool at the sink. She can stir things. Use meal preparation times to talk about healthy foods. Eat with her so she can see you setting a good example. Make meal times a pleasant experience focused on enjoying each other's company and not on what or how much or how fast she eats. Added: Several people mentioned giving her Pediasure. My pediatrician strongly advised against giving my daughter this. She said many children become "addicted" to it. She told me that if my daughter was getting something from all the food groups within a week's time that was sufficient for her nutritional needs.

Answer 2

Perhaps she enjoys the extra attention she gets when you yell or otherwise freak out over her eating too slowly. You're the parent, you set the boundaries. Make it clear to her that there is a set meal time for the entire family, and that they have that long and only that long to eat. When meal time is over, so is her meal, whether she's finished it or not. That's it. No discussion, no bargaining, just remove the food from the table and go on to the next piece of business for the day. Maybe a timer would help her to see that time is running out at she sits there.

If you're worried about her nutrition, give her a pediasure or other supplement during the day. But if you're consistent and firm, without yelling, she'll eventually get in step with the rest of the family.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Try not to shout or threaten, but you do need to expect her to eat a small amount and then hold her to that expectation. Hopefully this is a short phase she is going through. I taught 3 yr old preschool and 4 yr old preschool, and there is a WORLD of difference between the two ages. Sounds like you've tried the things I would have suggested, so just keep trying and wait for her to grow out of it.

Answer 4

try giving her the food she favors, and wait for her to get hungry, so not feed her when you think she might be hungry, just wait until she tells you she wants to eat something, otherwise you are never letting her get her full appetite so that might be why she doesn't want to eat, try giving her "pediasure" and see how she likes it.
and if she still doesn't eat take her to her pediatrician, threatening her will only make it worst because she will grow to be scared of you, and showing her ER episodes wouldn't be help full she is not at an age where she can fully understand a plot as complicated as the ones on ER.
Good luck.

Answer 5

Provide her with healthy meals and let her eat or not eat as she wishes. Give her choices, ask her, "Would you like this or this?" so she feels she has control and is making her own choices. Her behavior is a control issue - she's trying to establish independence and control. Have healthy snacks on hand - always offer her a choice between at least two things. As long as she has a choice, she feels she has some control. Don't worry about her not eating - she'll eat when she's hungry and as long as you have plenty of healthy options and give her choices, she'll manage to eat enough to stay healthy. Also, speak to your pediatrician about these concerns. Do not make this about you and your control. Do not threaten or bribe but try to remain relaxed - just tell yourself this behavior won't continue until she's college aged. That's always how I reassure myself. I just think, "Well, she won't always behave like this." Her behavior sounds normal. Best wishes!

Answer 6

her stomach is a big as her first she will get more full on a small amount of then you may think. try not giving her a drink with dinner she may be getting full of the liguid. don't force her to eat she may be not eating to keep some kind of control in her life. get some pediasure its great tasting full of vitamins and is a drink. taste like choclate shake and my kids love it. its good for those picky eaters. good luck

Answer 7

Don't push your daughter on eating fast. let her eat at her own pace, I notice when i eat fast i get full faster and im hungry again. so if she wants to eat slow let her, as long as she eats that what counts.