My bf is 3 yrs younger, And we been together for 1 year now, he is working in another country and not met him for few months, we always keep in touch on phone. Now he says he need 8 more years to marry me, and asking me to wait, i know he is young and always will be away from me, should i wait for him, after 8 years i will be in my30's. And I am worried he may change his mind. help me
2007-02-05 00:19:39 · 4 answers · asked by wendy w 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He doesnt want you...get yourself some self respect and a new boyfriend.
2007-02-05 00:28:20 · answer #1 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been in a long distance relationship, I can empathize with your situation. With that in mind, my gut feeling is that he's not ready to settle down (and might be dating others), but also wants you there as a "backup" in case he doesn't find someone else. If the person, regardless of the current age, isn't wanting to spend every waking moment with you and wanting to marry you as soon as possible, then, it means they're not the right one. 8 years is a long time especially if *you* are wanting to marry. There's no reason to "wait" 8 years only to find out that he wants to wait 8 more years or that 7 years from now he decides he doesn't ever want to marry you and you've wasted 7 years on him. Instead, I would consider taking this time, while you're both apart, to explore new relationships. My fiancee and I did that and ended up back together in 3 weeks, stronger than before and undoubtedly sure of our future together. Sometimes, each relationship needs a push (in one direction or another.) Good luck and I feel for you.
2007-02-05 08:31:51 · answer #2 · answered by KCgal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why 8 years exactly?!!! How old will he be, then? What are you going to do in between? Its a clear message that he is not ready for marriage, now.
Whether he is in love with you or not is not clear. Whatever the case, 8 years is too long to wait. As you said, you will be in your 30s, then.
Well, you are the one to decide. If I were you, I would move on and find a nice and ready guy to have serious relationship NOW!
Before that, tell your current bf that the message you get from him is that he is NOT ready to have serious relationship with you now, and that you are not ready to wait that long for him. Hence, you better let each other move on! If he IS in love with you, he will respond possitively. If not, the obvious will be obvious.
All the best!
2007-02-05 08:36:12 · answer #3 · answered by Ebby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bottom line this will be your choice, and how strong is your relationship at this point....after only one year and to make such a commitment is something I personally wouldn't do.... not that you two are looking other places, but people and life situations change, I would just take it day by day and see how this long distance relationship develops... and to me age has no importance.
2007-02-05 08:43:17 · answer #4 · answered by Renee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋