I met a man about 4 weeks ago in a night club i have seen him about 5 times since and we talk on the phone and text.. he said in a text last night that he is falling in love with me.. i dont want to hurt him as he is a nice bloke kind,and he makes me laugh but i dont feel the same we have both had bad relationships in the past. what do i say to him? as i dont want to lead him on and him get hurt...
2007-02-04 20:46:27 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He is going to get hurt if he is telling you the truth and there is nothing you can do about it. But to minimise his trauma and the negative effect it can have on you, you can :
Confirm that he is really in love with you and just is not saying it to get laid.
If he is really in love with you, check yourself out, give yourself some time to see if you can develop same feelings for him.
If you can't, tell him with all honesty that you are flattered but you don't want to say I love you because you don't feel so and that you don't want to be dishonest to a good friend.
He is going to trust you, that is what love does (it blinds us lol). Help him get a good girl friend. Spend time with him, see what his likes and dislikes are, assess what kind of a girl he will be happy with and she will be happy with him. Introduce him to such girls that you know, talk very high about him to these girls. You may end up with two very good friends in the same family and you never know how they may repay you.
If you don't want to go Thru all the hassles, tell him off politely and do not see him again. You cant keep seeing him and say I don't want to lead him on, as they say,you cant have your cake and eat it too.
2007-02-04 21:04:25 · answer #1 · answered by tony01p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is the only reason you're not willing to give you two a chance because of the fact that you had a bad relationship?? Hun you cant stop getting involved with someone over that - we've all had them - swore we'll never again get involved - but we all do at some stage!!
If you just genuinely dont like him that way then I think the best thing you can do is just tell him that you're not ready to get that emotionally involved and whilst you really like him you just dont want things to progress to a level of that depth.
xx
2007-02-04 20:53:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to be "just friends" then you better tell him there will never be anything more than that. He may be falling for you, or he may be just trying to tell you what you want to hear.
Which ever it is, you better tell him exactly where your relationship stands. To not tell him, WILL be hurting him. If he doesn't know, he will assume you love him, too. After all, you didn't say that you don't, right?
P.S. Think carefully before you tell him. Because if he does love you and you tell him that you don't love him, he WILL say good-bye.
2007-02-04 20:57:14 · answer #3 · answered by A dad & a teacher 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel. If he is a nice guy (and believe me we do finish last) he'll understand, i'm not saying you wont hurt him but if you don't tell him you will hurt him more simply because you could never love him the same. I would tell him today.
2007-02-04 20:55:29 · answer #4 · answered by Soul Reason 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him now. Like you said, you don't want to lead him on for him to get hurt even more.
You've only known each other for a month so you're only in the teething stages of your friendship, so he won't be hiurt that much.
...M0uthpiece...
2007-02-04 20:56:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel as soon as possible because the longer you leave it the harder it will be. Tell him that you also love him but only as a friend. There is nothing else oyu can say to him
2007-02-04 21:49:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why, what is it that you really what? fix your attitude towards this man if you really like him then go if you dont want to see him and go out with him the best way is to tell him honestly, its not your fault if you dont love nor like him its just the way it is.. or if you want, tell him that you just met and you dont know if you feel the same way towards him. simple as that.. good luck. dont forget.. just be honest
2007-02-04 20:54:10 · answer #7 · answered by eilisha19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him straight.
If you were the girl who fell in love with him - the guy wouldnt think twice about rejecting/hurting the girl.
So dont feel guilty - TELL HIM BLUNTLY.
2007-02-04 21:13:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
honesty dont have to hurt ...if u are sure that u cant feel more for him as many a friendship let him know as soon as possible cause it wouldnt be fair to him either
2007-02-04 23:05:06 · answer #9 · answered by athina68 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. tell him that youre not ready for a relationship. let him down gently but firmly.
2007-02-04 20:55:53 · answer #10 · answered by kiscool34 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋