Me and my bf have been going out for over 2 months and we are really into each other. I'm sweet to him and he treats me like a queen. He has two kids and i know they come first. But lately I've been questioning our relationship. He's an engineer, and when he calls me to do someting that night he gets stuck working late, or sometimes he's out of town of about a month every 3 or 4 months cus of work. There are times when he says he'll call be back he doesn't. At this point I'm pretty annoyed and frustrated but i know he has to work. What should I do?
2007-02-04 16:32:29 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I told him i understand about him working, and I'm the first relationship he's had in three years since is divorce. I try to forgive him when he doesn't call, but i would like for him to keep most of his promises...
2007-02-04 17:03:07 · update #1
Jobs like that take alot of maturity to deal with, when a relationship is involved. And it takes maturity on the parts of both you and he. He is probably doing his best, his job is probably very demanding, and there isn't much he can do about it short of find a new one, which would likely mean flushing his career down the toilet.
Be understanding of his predicament. If you want to date someone with that kind of career, you have to take everything that goes with it. It's one thing if he idolizes his job and values it more than you, that wouldn't be right. But if he values you, loves you, and is trying his best, then you need to make yourself satisfied with the best he has to offer. Try to squeeze more than what he can give, and it will mess up your relationship.
Both of you need to be understanding to each other's needs and do what you can to compensate to one another. Love is about giving, not about taking.
2007-02-04 16:50:51 · answer #1 · answered by The Link 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you've only been together two months? Your first problem is freaking out about this. Take into consideration how long he's been single. Has it been a while? People tend to get in their own habits (working late, going out of town, etc). Just like you he had his own life before you two got together. Being in a relationship takes effort. Communicating what will make the relationship work better and making plans to fix that is important. Tell him how you feel, but don't be pushy! Here's the key: make sure he knows what you want and make sure you know what he wants. NEVER compromise. Compromising means each of you gives up something. Build something that works for the both of you. Help him understand he isn't single anymore, he's got a woman by his side that needs his attention too!
2007-02-04 16:59:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just talk to him about it, let him know that u want to know where u stand and let him know that u know that his children come first, its just that u want to know if this relationship is going anywhere
2007-02-04 16:39:51 · answer #3 · answered by eyesopen16 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him...He may not realize what he is doing...
2007-02-04 16:51:05 · answer #4 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋