How can I deal with an 8 year old who has the attitude of an 18 year old??

Question

She has really gotten bad lately.. with the back talk, rolling the eyes, and just her general attitude. She is normally a really sweet kid... she had said that her stomach was cramping last week.. I dont know if she is getting ready to start puberty (Lord PLEASE help me if that is the case!).. but it seems awful early for that.. Any suggestions?????????????????? Thanks!!!

Excuse me I can assure you it is NOT bad parenting.

Answer 1

Treat her like an 8 year old, not like an 18 year old.

If she talks back, ground her. Punish her for things that an 8 year old shouldn't say or do. Take her to the park to play on the swings. Read her stories, even if she can read to herself. Watch cartoons with her. Teach her to bake cookies. Treat her like the 8 year old she is, and maybe she will act like one.

good luck!

Answer 2

... and I'm a 14 year old who has the attitude of a 4 year old... but I'm usually a normal kid. It's not puberty... I started that when I was around 9-10, and here I am today, fighting with my brother like we were 5 and 6.

I would not say that's the attitude of an 18 year old... hopefully not. Everyone thinks 8 year olds are supposed to be sweet little kids, but that's not true. Normal eight year olds do talk back, roll their eyes, and get stomach cramps :).

The stomach cramps might be the result of something she ate. I would say the attitude is normal for an 8-year old, but not so much a young adult-18-year-old.

Suggestions: Don't worry.

Answer 3

Set limitations and make sure she knows the consequences of her actions. Let her make the choice. And, this is really important, follow through with discipline. Take away things she likes when she exhibits behavior you don't like. And reward her for behavior you do like. Oh.... by the way....as someone else mentioned, puberty can start as early as 8. It is no common, but, can happen. It could be that maybe something is going on at school that is upsetting her and she's venting when she gets home. Or could be the group of friends she's hanging out with. I have an 8 year old son and a 9 year old stepdaughter. Trust me, they do the same stuff, and I nip it in the butt as soon as it happens. Doesn't hurt my feelings one bit if I have to take away TV privileges for a day or two. That usually stops the back talk real quick.

Answer 4

Well the stomach cramps might not be from puberty lerking around, maybe just an average stomach cramp from a little under-nourishment. Just have her eat some oranges. A little vitamin C always helps for everything. It might be puberty but just in case, take her to the doctor the next time she has those cramps anyways, so you can be sure.

Now with the attitude. An attitude like that is a very normal boy or girl thing about this age. In fact, at any age. Just lay down the law and if she doesn't like it, then tough. You're the parent.

A few ways to get to stop mouthing off:

-Hot Stuff - When I would mouth off to anyone, my dad would grab a jalapeno and rub it on my lips and tongue. I learned to not mouth off to him when I was six. It might sound a little harsh but it worked for me. You could also hot sauce given like cold medicine, on a spoon.

-Quick Draw - If she mouths off to you again, you don't have to use a jalapeno or any hot sauce. Just a good old fashioned slap across the mouth. Not hard enough to break her neck, but to get the point across. Just hit once when she mouths off too, that's the key to breaking her of her behavior habits.

-A good old fashioned spanking. My father used to play the psychological game on us. He purposely wait for hours before setting into our backsides. I was scared more during the wait, especially when all he said was "get up to you room, now."

You might be saying to yourself now, "This guy is nuts and I would never do that to my daughter." Well I'm not all physical punishment.

Some good old faithful ways to help keep my younger brother and I in line:

-Grounding us to our room without dinner.

-Grounding us to our room (in general). I want to add that all of our toys and stuff were in a play room, so we didn't really have anything in our room for this such punishment.

I hope I could be of some help to you.

Answer 5

My 9 year old daughter is the same way. And yes an 8 year old can be starting puberty. She had to start wearing a bra this summer and she complains of cramping in her stomach as well. I noticed alot of her friends acting the same way and I honestly think she picked alot of it up from them. She is a good kid but she is growing up and It is scary. You should really talk to her about the attitude and how it effects you and others around her. Maybe that will help at least a little

Answer 6

She might be mimiking you. Double check your attitude when she's around. Even if we don't notice our own behavior, the kids do, and they mimik us. We are their teachers and role models. I am always doing a double check on my behavior with the kids around. I listen to myself, and often ask myself if the kids have said or done the same think I am partially ashamed of saying or doing.

I don't agree that she learned it from school. I have a 7 and a 9 year old. They did it for a little bit. What I did was pointed it out every single time it happened. "You don't talk back to your father, even if it is unfair... he is your father, and you will respect him." or "You'll get a chance to talk once both of us have calmed down, but for now, don't you say another word, or you'll get to know the corner really well."

Always give a warning of the consequences to come and give them a chance to correct their behavior.

Always specify exactly what it is that you want in plain blunt simple terms, and don't eggagerate or elaborate.

Always treat the same misbehavior with the same consequence. If you back off or let them get away with a (really unwanted) behavior, then they will feel the room and push for more. (Also, don't sweat the small stuff, or we parents will go insane!)

Always FOLLOW THROUGH with your threats... "If you whine at me one more time, you're going straight to bed without dessert". "But Mom....." "Go to bed right now." It will stop when they know that the boundaries are set in stone.

Stomach cramping... maybe she ate too much candy or cake. Maybe she stuffed her stomach full. My 7 yr old girl complains about a stomach ache right after eating a lot. I'm not worried about her starting puberty, but I am educating her on "girl secrets" when she asks about my stuff under the sink. She probably got into the cookie jar, or a friend gave her their lunch. We feed our kids what we think is "enough" for them. When they take on their own feeding habits before they are ready, they are bound to make some mistakes.

Answer 7

Your daughter is simply 'trying to get your goat' and she's doing a good job of it. It could be that she is going through a 'rough pre-puberty' so you should be 'ready' for her to have her first period at any time (I started when I was only 7) ... but to get her 'behavior' to 'improve' I'd suggest treating her 'like a baby' and telling her to go 'sit facing the corner' for ten minutes at first, then add two minutes each time she 'acts out' toward you. That get's really old really fast, and if you do it consistently she'll 'straighten up' and be 'a really sweet young person' again ... but that is a 'YOUNG PERSON' and not a 'kid' ... so you'll still have to deal with the fact that she's not 'really' a baby any more, too.

Answer 8

I know a ton of people are saying to treat her like an 8 year old, but really that will just frustrate her. If she is being rude to you, say one last thing and walk away. She will learn and if she learns now, the teenage years will be much less unpleasant. She is not starting puberty, she probably just had diareah (i can't spell it). As for the behavior, she learned it from her friends or TV or something and she wants to act grown up. She will grow out of it.

Answer 9

My almost eight year old gets stomach aches alot now but that's because she never wants to slow down to use the bathroom like she should! Don't let her back talk or roll her eyes at you! You are the mother and she should respect you. Please teach this to her now and put your foot down, or it will only get worse. Send her to her room every time she does this then make her apologize to you when she comes out. It will get old soon enough when she sees you will not tolerate it. Take away friends coming over until her attitude changes. Make a Dr.s apt to make sure nothings wrong. Good luck!

Answer 10

First even at 8 she would already be starting up to flow via the onset of puberty. My daughter develop into 10 even as she all started her era and blooming and for further or less a year or so in the previous hand she develop right into a nightmare. call the pediatrician and take her in for a checkup and see what she has to assert. so a strategies because the scuffling with. I went via this with mine and that i made a rule no hitting or yelling allowed era through everyone interior the domicile. Everytime someone did they had to positioned 50 cents interior the naughty jar. similar with my husband and that i and shortly all of us all started utilising a calmer voice. also if any of them hit a sibling they'd kitchen duty for a week. they had to assist prepare dinner, clean up etc. My daughters are 16 and 10 now or maybe as they get the body of recommendations they comprehend all and commence with the disrespect I ignore about them and tell them even as they could communicate over with me the way a baby could communicate over with a figure then i am going to pay interest, i do no longer strive against with them, argue or some thing else they flow off and performance their tantrum and then they'll come lower back calmer. I also refuse to do some thing for them except they could ask with appreciate. Exclude her from an activity and tell her that till her body of recommendations alterations and he or she will be in a position of be positive then she cant take section and damage the relaxing for each human being else. this is a not person-friendly time for her. She is youthful than her brothers and chance is perhaps without you seeing it they warfare to tug off the enormous brother bit and he or she is scuffling with lower back to instruct them she will be in a position of shelter herself. You spent one on one together with her yet how about dad? countless females truly relate extra perfect to their dad at that age than their mom i comprehend my youngest does. in spite of you do precisely be straightforward about it and keep it consistent, no matter when you're drained even as she acts out you nevertheless ought to prepare an similar punishment as continually.