i was raped at 13 my mom said she was pressing charges but didnt what should i do im 32 now?

Answer 1

It seems your mom let you down.
What is important here is what YOU want to do, not so much what you should do?
If you haven't dealt with the trauma of having been raped at 13 yet, then I suggest you start there.
Left untreated there will be a lot of anger, resentment, & self-recriminations that have been allowed to fester inside for about 19 years You deserve the kind of care & attention that only a good councellor can give you now.

I am so sorry that this happened to you.

Answer 2

When you're talking about minors having sex, the term "rape" does not refer to "sex without consent" as much as "sex without legal consent." In every jurisdiction in the country, there is an age below which people (kids) MAY NOT give informed consent to have sex. According to the international AIDS charity Avert (I'd think they'd want to call it an anti-AIDS charity, but I guess that confuses people into thinking they're against people with AIDS), the age of consent in Puerto Rico is 16. If both of you are 16 or older, it's likely that any sexual intercourse was legal as long as you both consented. Many jurisdictions make this more complicated (i.e., something may be a misdemeanor if one of you is 17 and the other 15, but a felony if one of you is 15 and the other 25), but if one of you is under 16, it's extremely likely that it could be considered a crime. Once the police are involved, "I don't want to press charges" is usually fiction you see on TV or in the movies. When the police have evidence a crime has been committed, they'll refer it to prosecutors whether anyone wants them to or not. The D.A. can choose not to continue, particularly if people "refuse to testify" by indicating they'll lie on the witness stand AND they can't get a conviction without that testimony, but that's kind of rare. And in the case you describe, even more unlikely: if your girlfriend is pregnant and you're the father, and if she is a minor, her parents can grant consent for DNA testing or releasing medical records proving the pregnancy exists and who the father is. If someone's threatening to call police on you for something that might, even unintentionally, have been a crime, then you need to talk to a lawyer absolutely as fast as possible. They cost a lot because they know the law, when something that looks illegal is not, and when it hasn't been consistently applied (which can lead courts to throw out charges). Sorry to tell you that, but you need professional expert help on the situation immediately.

Answer 3

I don't know what the statute of limitations are on rape, but if there are none.....I'd file charges myself as soon as possible. THEN I'd confront my mother about why she didn't do that for you when she told you she would! Are you ok now? Have you had any counseling and help getting through this? If not, I strongly suggest you get some help to deal with it. I wish you the very best hun.

Answer 4

If this is something that is really bothering you I would say make an appointment with a counselor, who will be able to find out if you are having post-traumatic stress reactions - which is typical for an adult who never dealt or worked through abuse as a child or teen. Legally, I don't think there is anything you can do now, unless the perpetrator is frequentlly exposed to other children, such as his own children, stepchildren, etc. If you believe he is a threat to others you might want to contact your state's family services, but I doubt that they will follow-up unless the guy has been identified as a sexual perpetrator by the State. As for you and how you are dealing with this, counseling may be the first step for you. A counselor is often trained in this sort of thing and they can help you work through any unresolved feelings. A counselor might also suggest a session where both you and your mother are present to work through any unresolved tensions. If your mother did not ever follow through before, it is unlikelly she will want to get involved in any of your unresolved grief - not because she doesn't love you but because it is often difficult for parents to deal with the fact that they failed to act appropriately and that would require dealing with their own feelings of guilt. I would hope that your mother would feel guilt about not following up on something so traumatic, but sometimes parents actually do not believe that they did anything wrong by not acting. Sometimes parents will acknowledge their mistakes and apologize, but I wouldn't expect this to happen because in my experience it rarely does. What's important is for you to focus on you and get the help you need to understand this issue that seems to be unresolved for you. Many women do not deal with issues of abuse until later in life, so don't feel alone. There are many books about sexual abuse and assault, with helpful suggestions about how to find peace with your past. I would look for a book written by someone in the mental health profession and is credentialed.

Answer 5

your mom is horrible...how could she not have pressed charges shes horrible...I'm sorry this happened to you.... I would recommend you talk to a police officer maybe they can help you. because I'm not too sure about the laws but I think there is a time restriction on reporting rapes...take care and good luck!

Answer 6

I dont know if you can do anything now, was there a report made?? If nothing can be done, seek some kind of counseling that way it doesn't eat at your mind and you can find some kind of healing. Good Luck and God Bless

Answer 7

It's up to you to decide what to do. Since you're an adult you can go to the police yourself and report it. If you have proof that you were raped there's a good chance they'll prosecute.

Answer 8

Why has it taken you so long to ask this question? Of course, you should report the incident! And get some counselling!

Answer 9

i had the same situation, although i am only 18 now, when i turned 18 i went to do it myself, there is nothing u can do unless you have proof, so i got some counseling, and that really helped

Answer 10

You waited too long. You could always go to the authorities and mention it. But evidence and credibility wont be so great because you waited too long.