I meet a guy about a month ago. He came on really strong at first and I told him I would like to take it slow. Well time has been going by and I am really starting to care about him. Well a month has gone by and today I told him I would like to take it to the next level. And now he is not ready. He is waiting to see where his job is going to take him (law enforcement). He might be moving so he does not want to commit. I am crushed and not sure what to do at this point. He says he wants to just take it slow. I feel rejected now. How can I make this ok?
2007-02-04 14:45:58 · 9 answers · asked by schaves55 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think he is being honest and responsible with you.
Many men would not care and would take advantage of you offering "the next level" with full knowledge that the relationship would go no where.
I think you should look at this in a more positive light.
You should not feel rejected. Sure, it did not go the way you wanted it to go, but you have learned at least one positive trait about this person.
You don't have to "make this ok". You can show him that you support him and his decision. Should he have to move you can still talk about maintaining a relationship over a distance.
So try not to worry. We worry too much about many things that never end up happening and so little time enjoying the moment.
Enjoy your present moment.
2007-02-04 14:57:59 · answer #1 · answered by Gorgo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be crushed. At least he cares enought about you that he is being honest (finally). His career is his first priority and it is too soon in your relationship for him to know if he would want you to go with him, or for you to know if you would want to go.
Basically, he is asking you to put your life on hold until he sees where his is going. At this point, he's not looking for someone to share his life, just someone to be around until he leaves.
Don't feel rejected, feel mad because he didn't tell you up front he may be leaving and this would be a short term relationship. Plan for your own life, you'll meet someone who wants a relationship that can grow.
2007-02-04 15:43:58 · answer #2 · answered by bella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They claim timing is everything, and it appears your's is off a bit. I guess the ball is in his court now and if it's worth waiting for, you'll just have to wait and see what happens with his job. Maybe after he figures that out, then you may be able to proceed to the next level.. Good Luck, just be patient. If it's meant to be it will happen.
2007-02-04 14:51:50 · answer #3 · answered by Suzie- Q 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen up, do not feel rejected, you just met the guy. Be educated in your own game of life as he is. Do not feel crushed. Listen to what he is telling you, read between the lines ok. We as woman should not ever feel rejected in a 1 month relationship
2007-02-04 14:55:52 · answer #4 · answered by adele o 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He didn't tell you to piss off. He still likes you. He's unsure of where his career is going to take him and he doesn't want to become attached to you and hurt you if he has to relocate. Don't feel rejected. Just think of it as a missed opportunity next time some thing like this comes along don't be hesitant to grab the golden ring.
2007-02-04 14:51:27 · answer #5 · answered by Rocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how do u think he felt when you told him you wanted to wait. SO just be patient. IF your meant to be the time will be right eventually. Its better to wait on the sex until your completely committed like marriage.
2007-02-04 14:52:37 · answer #6 · answered by Christina H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awww hon i went thru something almost like that where my relationship was stuck at "just friends" since he'd be moving sometime....but it kinda went further adn when he DID move i felt so hurt when he didn't stay in touch.....so don't feel bad if you don't take it further, it's better that way so you don't get hurt, i hope it all turns out, being in love sometimes sucks more than i ever thought
2007-02-04 14:53:58 · answer #7 · answered by shine_on 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore him. I'm serious. Nothing works better than acting like it doesn't bother you a bit. If he calls, say your at the mall or at a friends. Always appear to have just moved on. Believe me, he'll be around...
2007-02-04 14:49:45 · answer #8 · answered by The Dave 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
He didnt say " i dont want to EVER" he just said he isnt ready . if u really like him yull respect his choice and learn to wait . it really isnt u . let him take his time .
2007-02-04 14:49:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋