How do you handle emotionally handle it when your grown children wish to move far to another state?

Answer 1

Three of my four kids all moved to different states within 3 months of each other ... leaving me with just my youngest at home. Not only that, but two of the three had been living at home til then. It was difficult, for sure .. especially when Christmas rolled around and for the first time, not only were we not all together, but I only had one of my kids with me.

However, it was I who had encouraged them each to do so, and helped them pave the way for their move ... anywhere from 650 to 3200 miles away! I wanted them to spread their wings and try new things, and told them not to worry about me, but to go have fun and learn and grow.

It was hard on me of course, but I didn't and don't ever want my kids to change their life plans for me, or consider my needs before their own desires and wants.

Interestingly, within three years, all three had moved back to the home town ... and I picked up and moved 600 miles away to Canada! LOL! Now THEY are the ones complaining and dealing with the emotional fallout! Although granted, I miss them, and mostly I miss my grandkids, being so far.

Anyway, support them, keep yourself busy, write lots of letters, chat with them on IM and webcam, and keep as close as you can to them over the distance.

Answer 2

I did it and so did my sister. I know my mom was very sad and that was before email and cell phones. My kids are now both far away at college. We email and talk almost daily which melts away the miles. Tell yourself you did a bunch of good parenting to raise children confident enough to stike out on their own. Time will make it easier as long as you stay in close commuinication. Look forward to trips each way and cherish the time together.

Answer 3

The job of a parent is to prepare they're children to reach adulthood and be able to make there own way in the world independent of you. It sounds like you have accomplished that. Be happy if they are making there own way successfully. If you are unable to do this, you probably have an unhealthy emotional attachment. Now's the time to celebrate your success and enjoy a life of your own. Best wishes with that.

Answer 4

I went to college 19 hours (by car) from my house for four years. Three months after graduation I left the country (non military) for two years. Growing up requires one to spread their wings and adventure out. Dont hold a child back or make them afraid to venture out b/c once that fear has developed it can be a long time or never that they will leave the nest. Support them. Keep yourself active with other hobbies. Try something new and dont think that they will never ever come back. Because we do! We come home for holidays, vacations and to have that "home" feeling in our hearts when we miss it. Keep your arms open because home will always be home!