My grown children, have not cared for one boyfriend that I had after my marriage broke up, and even stopped speaking to me for a few years because they did not agree. We were doing no harm to them. They watch me like a hawk, and are questioning my own private time, if I am 'busy' sometimes. I feel I have a right to my own private life, and do not involve them in that part, as it clearly is too upsetting for them, and they do not agree with my choices. I am still there for all of them, and still their Mom. Do I not have the rights or am I wrong? I am not sure how to handle this situation. I feel I should be able to see whom I choose to, and not have to answer to them. I respect them in every way. Help?
2007-02-04 13:59:10 · 11 answers · asked by GentleSoul 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Not at all. Please go on with your life. It is to short. They are grown-up and yes they are going to feel they are still in control. But go have some fun, It will take them some time, eventually they will see that he has not taken you away from them. Only time will allow that.
2007-02-04 14:03:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Goodness, what meddling children you have! I'm sure they worry about you, and they probably have some unresolved issues over the separation of you and their dad. Bottom line is, you do have a right to your own private life. It's unfortunate they stopped talking to you for a few years, but I think that was a tactic by them to get "control" of what you do. This is not acceptable, and neither are their unsolicited questions and comments. Tell them exactly what you just said: "I can see whom I choose to, and I do not have to answer to you kids." And make that the end of the discussion, FOREVER. They can't talk to you about this if you're not listening or answering them back. If they insist on being disrespectful, hand them a Pamper and a ba-ba and tell them to go home.
2007-02-04 14:07:58 · answer #2 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gee, I hear more and more of this. What the heck are these kids thinking? It's beyond me! Of course they have no rights to question your life! They can be concerned, out of love, and act appropriate. But to get nasty, and act like you've gone senile, and don't know how to make right choices for your self -that's way out of control. Your their mother, your human-just like them!Almost makes you wonder who the heck brought them up huh? If they only knew the deep hurt they truly are causing you deep inside, they surly would be ashamed! Let's hope their own children don't do the same to them! I guess keeping your distance is the best way to keep your sanity.
2007-02-04 14:09:02 · answer #3 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i be attentive to that's difficult to handle an ex while infants are in touch simply by shortcoming of involvement on their section maximum cases,yet you will possibly desire to in no way save your infants from seeing the different determine every time a probability.while the youngsters grow previous have confidence me they see each determine for who they're and you decide on them to make there own determination on the mothers and dads involvement.you do by no ability choose your infants again lower back at you and say which you saved them from the different determine.even nevertheless you're actually not recieving infant assist you will possibly desire to nonetheless enable your ex to work out the newborn's.interior the tip you will shine like the hero have confidence me in this.solid success & ultimate desires
2016-09-28 10:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by gloyd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them how you are feeling. Tell them that you appreciate their love and concern. However, you choose not to be alone and want and desire a companion in your life. And they need to get use to the idea. You did after all raise them and obviously they did not turn out so bad, they are just being over protective. And they need to realize you do deserve to have happiness. Good luck and God bless****
2007-02-04 14:31:33 · answer #5 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not...yes...your grown children have the right to question your private life....because they want your well-being, they care about you....the man for you will come at the right time and you will know when you see your children interacting with that person...remember.....children first.....
2007-02-04 14:07:36 · answer #6 · answered by Spread the word! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are their Mother, how is it they have grown up, and feel they have to be your parent? Somewhere along the line, they have lost their view of you as Mother/Adult. You tell them straight out, that you are an Adult, and being one, you can do whatever you want to do. Then you tell them, that you are their Mother, and under no circumstance will you tolerate them treating you like you are their child, you are the one who carried them, gave birth to them, and raised them, and they better damn well give you the respect that you deserve.
2007-02-04 14:07:45 · answer #7 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They have no right. Tell them so in the most gentle way possible. They might be upset at first, but they love you and will come to their senses. Good luck and enjoy yourself!!
2007-02-04 14:20:08 · answer #8 · answered by luvmykids 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get those kids of yours together and tell them this:
you are grown and i have my OWN private life. i do not need your approval, and you do not need to question me. i will do as i please, and you all need to accept it.
then leave it at that
2007-02-04 14:08:49 · answer #9 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them enough so they feel secure.
Don't lie to them.
2007-02-04 14:01:57 · answer #10 · answered by susan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋