I have been really depressed and under a great deal of stress and my mother in law said she wouldn't help me. No reason except that she doesn't want to. I asked her 3 times when I needed help during 3 times DESPERATLY. One time it was because she wanted to eat lunch with her friends. Now I don't expect her to drop everything but she has never come over to my house to help me ever or even ever come over to visit. She expects us to go see her.
Also, I have no family at all and my friends all work so the only person I have is her.
Would you be upset or no?
Thanks.
2007-02-04 13:40:47 · 8 answers · asked by tina*21 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well, if you can't change your circumstances, you must change yourself. Only YOU can make you happy. Once you realize that, no one else will matter. How about, instead of "needing" her, why don't you just call her up one day and inviter her to lunch. If she won't reach out to you, reach out to her. That simple!!
2007-02-04 13:44:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
a million) you're unquestionably not incorrect approximately this. the final element newlyweds choose is their mom around 24/7. it is in basic terms an exceedingly undesirable theory. And sure, that's quite generic once you first get married to have little funds. an outstanding sort of newlyweds positioned each little thing on credit, or have already finished college, so as that they have got lots, yet can the two discover the money for it or are somewhat in debt over their heads. do not you remember the thoughts our mothers and dads informed us approximately having not something? you initiate out with little, get excitement from what you have, and artwork up from there. 2) and you have each suited to sense neglected approximately this too. It somewhat does not sound like it is his mom it rather is the concern, it would desire to be him. (granted i don't be attentive to him or his mom, or the main factors of each little thing.) He should not be speaking to her, he might desire to be speaking to you. you will possibly desire to have an prolonged calm talk with him approximately all this. If it is how issues are actually, are you able to think of what they are going to be in case you're married and living together with his mom? permit him be attentive to that he's finding out to purchase a house with YOU, not his mom. And if he would be unable to appreciate why you do not sense soft living in his mom's basement, then consistent with probability you will possibly desire to inspect premarital counseling. (maximum states require it besides) i be attentive to it would desire to sound drastic, yet this might exchange into an exceedingly enormous, very gruesome concern, VERY quickly. solid success hun and that i'm hoping each little thing seems for the final!
2016-09-28 10:37:43 · answer #2 · answered by gloyd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Friends all work? You don't?
Just what kind of help do you "desperately" need? Are you looking for a maid, a cook, a baby sitter? You have no right to expect your mother-in-law to be any of these. Maybe if you weren't so demanding, she would find enjoy helping you. No one wants to be required to assist others, but most of us find pleasure in doing for people who appreciate our help.
I'm assuming that you are female, although that isn't so stated. Your mother-in-law fulfilled her responsibility when she raised her son, your husband. When he married he assumed adult responsibilities and that includes your well being. She is no longer has any obligations to him and certainly not to you.
Grow up!
To quote the great English poet, Milton, "A mind in its own place can make a heaven out of hell or a hell out of heaven." Only you can control your own happiness.
2007-02-05 05:21:54 · answer #3 · answered by Texana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course I would be hurt...we live in a very selfish world....I have learned to turn and wipe the dust off my feet with people like this....you need to turn the other direction and seek out others that will Bless your life....and don't dwell on those that are an emotional anchor on your heart....just cut the rope dear....You are not going to change selfish people....you will just make yourself misery trying. Be Blessed.
2007-02-04 13:47:19 · answer #4 · answered by ticklemeblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i would be upset but i have realized that if someone doesn't want to help me or spend time with me then i really don't want them to do it out of obligation. So i just stop asking that particular person.. Who knows maybe she will come around if you stop asking. Good Luck
2007-02-04 13:49:37 · answer #5 · answered by dekota1997 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may be a little too dependent or needy and she is not comfortable with that. I don't know why you would need your mother in law "DESPERATLY" unless you needed her to call an ambulance for your or something.
2007-02-04 13:51:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i would be upset. Now that you are in-laws, she should be considered your family. Try talking to her, and if it doesn't work I would write her off.
2007-02-04 13:50:35 · answer #7 · answered by pchiz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you have the right to be upset.I would try to talk to her about this.and also talk to your husband.we all need help from time to time.
2007-02-04 13:47:37 · answer #8 · answered by Dew 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋