Please only answer if this applies. I am looking for positive feedback. Thanks?

Question

Does anyone have a toodler still sleeping in your bed with you? 2 years old? I love it. I love waking up next to my little girl. However I know its healthy for her to move on to her own bed. I was looking for how you all did it with your children. I don't mean to sound picky but I was hoping to hear from families that did the switch with children over 2 years of age. I don't beleive in letting my child cry it out when it comes to bed time routines. So any suggestions in that area no need. Thank you though. But for all those who feel they can relate to me. I would LOVE to hear from you. Thank you so much.

Answer 1

When I found out I was pregnant I knew I had to move my2 year old in to her own room. I moved her from my bed to the crib next to my bed. I did it while she was sleeping. once she accepted that, I started to talk to her about her room and her own big girl bed. She was excited because she wanted her own room like her brother. We picked some of her favorite colors which were pink and light green with a border of roses. We brought in a set of small to size wicker table and chairs. We decorated her toddler bed with fluffy pillows and stuffed animals, dolls and heart pillows. I bought her a doll house and baby dolls in cribs. I played with her often in her room so she could get used to it. I kept saying and relating her to her room and her bed. I often put her down for her nap in her toddler bed in the begining. She loved her room. I never used her room as a time out spot. And onece she felt familiar and comfortable with her room, one morning I told her that tonight she would be sleeping in her own bed like her big brother. And I kept reminding her about it through out the day. When it was time to brush teeth (routine is important) I reminded her again then took her to her bed, read her a book, prayed and gave her a kiss and turned off the lights except for the nite light. I did the same thing every nite so she felt secure and could predict what comes next. She did not cry and the transition was easy and smooth. It was amazing because her older brother had a harder time. I remember having to walk him to his bed 3 to five times a night until he accepted going to his bed. a word of caution once you put her in her bed and gets used to it don't let her in your bed because she might regress. And then you'll have to start all over.

Answer 2

I my daughter when she had her 2nd birthday. We left her crib in the room and she liked having the choice, and she chose her big girl bed. We had her pick out her own sheets and pillow case. She even got to pick out a big stuffed animal that wouldn't have normally fit in her crib. We took the crib out after a month and got her a kitchen thing to take it's place. She didn't even notice that her crib was gone. Now she's 3 and we still have sleep overs in my room. I love waking up to her little voice telling me it's morning time. She understands that sometimes she can come in my bed but she has a big girl bed and she likes to go there too. Sometimes she gets afraid of the dark and we don't have a night light in our room so that's when she feels better in her room. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. My husband works nights so I'm all alone in there and most of the time the dog is the only one hogging the covers. It's nice to have her stealing the blankets and pushing me off the bed for a change. She did cry a few times but we really inforced the idea of her being a big girl and that she will be love being in a big girl bed and not in a crib. The crib was hard for her to get in and out of and she liked the idea of having that freedom. Good luck. I hope that even when my daughter is 20 that she still has sleep overs with me. Staying up half the night and pigging out on icecream watching the Notebook or Beaches. That would be cool.

Answer 3

Make going to bed in their own bed a special thing by taking a lot of time getting them there every night.

Follow the same routine by starting the process the same every night.

Give them a bath, a soothing sort of snack (ie warm milk in a sippy cup) while reading them stories (notice I said stories) while they are in they are in their big boy/girl bed, have them take a special plushy toy or blankie with them.

Maybe buying them a new plushy toy that has its eyes closed and only bring it out when its time for bed. Give the plushy a name and talk to it and act like it is answering you. Brush the plushy against your child's cheek when you first get it. Give it a loving, comforting personality. Name it with that thought in mind.

You may want to add putting on soothing music. Look at Amazon.com or your local store for some cd's for beddy time.

This may also be a time when you want to use a little baby language.

Make sure the lights are low during this whole process.

Soothing is the word that comes to mind in all things around this time.

This may have to evolve over a long period of time at two. It will be like potty training which you should not be doing at the same time. Pick either the bed or the potty training first.

Let her/him come back into bed with you if they have fallen asleep in their own bed first (if you don't fall asleep first).

Like everything with children it will take patience, tolerance, time, and love.

Always think about how you would have wanted it done.

I believe you know this is the time to do this even though you seem to want your child in bed with you. Maybe you could also try the same routine for yourself when starting out and give yourself patience, tolerance, time, and love. Get yourself a new comfy pillow, a light snack, a good book, and soothing music.

PS. No exciting or scary stories. "Goodnight Moon" is a classic. Two words - Rocking Chair.

Answer 4

I think all children will get in their own beds soon enough. My 3 1/2 and my 2 yrs still sleep with me. My three yr old goes to bed in his bed, but comes in at night. The 2 yr old just always sleeps wiht us. All my kids did this at some point and guess what my 9 and 12 yr old are sleeping in their own rooms and beds now. Don't worry about it they are little for such a short time enjoy it while you can. Good luck

Answer 5

We loved having our son in bed with us too when he was little. As long as you have a roomy bed, I don't see a problem with it. People have done the same all throughout history-- it's only a recent thing for people to disapprove of it.

When my son switched from crib to his own bed, he still would come to our bed if he woke in the middle of the night. But I think it made him feel more secure to know he could do that.

Eventually, around age 5 or six, he did it less and less, until he only did it once in a while, and he was always welcome. Of course, if you have more than one child, this can become a problem. :) But we only ever had one child and he is now 21 years old and behaving like your average 21 year old. So apparently it doesn't do any harm to let your child sleep in bed with you.

One thing though-- I wouldn't do that with an infant. Too great a chance for smothering or SIDS. But with a toddler it seems to work pretty well and make them feel safer and more bonded with their parents. I wasn't one to let my child cry, either--and my child didn't use a pacifier (I hate those things).

There's no substitute for time and cuddling with Mom and Dad--so go for it. Have fun with your child and love her and spend lots of time with her. She'll be grown before you realize it and you'll miss the little kid she was. I love my grown child but I miss the little kid he was. I am so glad I gave him so much of my time when he was small. I was a stay-home mom and we sacrificed all the material stuff (we never owned a home until he was nearly grown) to live on one salary and give our child the attention, education, and time that every child needs.

Answer 6

My mom and dad had the same problem with me, except I was 3 and she was pregnant with my sister and knew I would have to move out. They tried buying me a really nice bed and making bedtime as fun as possible for me, but nothing worked. My mom is one of the most loving people in the world and hates to do anything that hurts me or my sister, so I know what she was forced to resort to just killed her. After trying everything they read about, heard about, etc, and still not being able to get rid of me, they had to shut their door and lock me out. She said it was horrible, but it was the only way. She said I cried for three or four nights trying to get in, each night falling asleep in front of their door with a pillow and blanket. After 3 or four nights they would start finding me on the couch, which was halfway btwn my bedroom and theirs, and finally, a few days after that, I learned to sleep in my bed. I know it sounds really harsh, and I was shocked to hear about it, but I've gotta tell you, I don't remember it at all. And know that I'm old enough to understand, I know parents have to do what they've gotta do. I'm not saying this is what YOU have to do, but even if it sounds harsh, chances are it'll work and the child will never remember it. As long as it doesn't bring up the question of whether or not it's physically abusive to the child, you should be ok.

Answer 7

Our son was 3 years old and still sleeping in our bed when we decided it was ready for him to transition to his own bed. We went out and bought him a little tikes roadster toddler bed, and let him pick out his own sheets. He still did not want to sleep in his new bed alone in his own room and would cry (which is too hard for me to take). We ended up taking his mattress and putting it on the floor next to our bed. We slowly over time moved the mattress farther and farther from our bed, until he was ready to go into his own room. It took a few weeks, but it was worth the wait to see the transition go so smoothly for our son. Good luck!

Answer 8

I saw this on the t.v. show the nanny a couple weeks ago..this is what she did...she made the child go cold turkey, the dad put him to bed and stood at the door with out looking at him, when he got out of bed, he would put him back in the bed without speaking to him, it went on for like four hours, it was killing the dad but the child sleeping in the marital bed was killing his marriage...(sure it isn't helping yours)....The child did cry and I don't see how you can get around that one....it took about a three or four day period, each day he would protest much less time and within a week he was sleeping,happily , in his own bed and the parents were able to sleep together agian. I am not trying to be hard on you or critical but you gotta let this child in the bed thing go...you are not doing her any favors either, she needs to start to learn self comfort...you won't always be with her,,,they grow up!!! This is when you start helping them learn those skills...good luck, hope this helps...

Answer 9

Well I am with you on some of that, I am a mom of a 13 month old that we switched her to her bed at 12 months. She had to cry it out for a week ( she only cried for like 20 min the first night and less night after night on from that) It is VERY healthy for them and you for you to have the child out of the room.( for her Independence and your marriage) I do not know a good way to make them go with out crying it out. I think it is pretty much impossible. I loved my daughter in the bed with me but what I did not know was it was something that would be a habit hard to break that you have to be strong with. When my husband and I have another child I will not do it!! Just be tough and understanding because she only knows what you have let her experience which is sleeping with you.

Answer 10

We let our son pick out a new big boy theme for his room. He picked spider man. So we got him a full bed and redone his room. After that if if he came in the middle of the night we made him sleep on a pallet on the floor. He didn't like that and went back to bed. Good Luck