Okay, here's a little background on me: I'm 20 years old, not ugly at all but unfortunately have yet to have a gf. About a month ago I thought maybe the best way for me to start dating girls was using craigslist, and so through that I had met someone. Unfortunately I just found out today that this person I've been talking to for a few weeks now had lied to me about what she looked like, which devestated me because we had so much in common and she was really the first girl that I felt close with. Anyways, now I'm fed up with the whole online thing - I want to start meeting girls in public/social places, but the problem is I am still too shy. I've read a lot of people's Answers on this site, and they all have something in common: don't be afraid to get rejected it will happen a lot; just throw yourself out there eventually a girl will give you her number. Yet I am still way too shy to just go out and start the whole game, so please if you guys can give me any tips/advice/suggestions
2007-02-04 10:10:18 · 7 answers · asked by Paul Smith 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well bro, I used to be quite introverted myself. Could not just spark up a conversation with a chick. I guess one day, I got over it. HOW? Hell, I don't know. Throw yourself out there and a girl will give you her number? Not happening, anything worth having is worth working for. Some chick passes the digits off the bat, probably not worth having as a GF...nookie buddy maybe. I can give you some pointers.
Start doing some things that build your self-esteem, projects, learn some things, become a well rounded person. Watch other 'successful' guys, find out what they do, what works. Work on your 'game' with friends, but don't really tell them thats what your doing at first (but you DO have to let them know - not cool otherwise). Get a chick friend to run around with - always easier to talk to girls when the pressure is off, and your chick friend can always back you up in crash and burn situations. Find your funny bone. Humor is a great ice-breaker, and apparently, many girls have told me, chicks dig funny. Finally, quit trying so damn hard. That is when I got better with the women, when I swore them off. Did not really want anything to do with them.
Its like anything else it takes time. It takes a couple rides on a motorcycle to get the whole 2 hands and 2 feet doing 4 different things situation down, but once you get it, it becomes real, real easy. Same with not being shy. Once you get the first phone number, then second one is a little easier, confidence builds and it is down hill from there. (I would say start by flirting with ugly girls as practice, but that would not be nice, would it?)
About the rejection thing: I have always approached it like this. If I talk to 100 girls, I am shot down at least 50 times. Then, I will shoot down 25 of the remaining 50. Out of that 25, 10 of them will be interested enough to talk further, 2 of them will give it up. Its numbers and probability.
MOST of all, be yourself - STAY away from cheesy pick up lines, unless they are original and very, very funny. But if you are not yourself, when you do get the number, you will get shot down on the phone, because you were faking.
2007-02-04 10:28:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you hang around with/talk to girls more, you'll get less shy around them. If you have friends that have girl-friends, then you could start hanging around with them, then after a while you'll feel more comfortable around girls. So then when you're at social places, you won't feel as shy to ask someone out.
And if all else fails, use a little dutch courage.
2007-02-04 10:27:15 · answer #2 · answered by Someguy234 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about other girls, but I like guys who are shy. they are mysterious and I love it. It makes want to go out of my way to get know them. But on the other hand some girls HATE it, so you should compliment I girl every once and I while and ask her name and just do obvious things to let her know you interested.
2007-02-04 10:20:15 · answer #3 · answered by L.Rae 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Cure Social Anxiety Shyness - http://SocialAnxiety.uzaev.com/?DSXb
2016-06-21 00:34:18 · answer #4 · answered by Randy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's ok you are just getting ready my friend he's holy crap shy he wont even get near me anymore girls will understand that you are shy you just have to tell them when they say like how are you? just say im really shy.
if you told me i would understand.
soo it's ok you are just getting ready.
2007-02-04 10:19:08 · answer #5 · answered by shaneahadberg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
start liking your self more do something you really enjoy that is around people you'll meet someone
2007-02-04 10:16:11 · answer #6 · answered by dogydoorman@sbcglobal.net 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell you what!!!!!its all in the talk nothing more!!look around!!!see most guys are either better looking or not.. but girls give them attention right!!its the talk noting more
2007-02-04 10:16:47 · answer #7 · answered by outvirtual 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋