I 'm married and have four children current husband is not the father . i have two small children ages 4,6 alwaays into something and if he see them he'll tell them to stop ar come tell me what they did he just mainly talks to them .So when they go over to their father have he grills them about what is happening at home and then he call me and tell me that he does not what my current husband saying anything to his children he makes my life a living hell so what am i suppose to do help me out people give me your honest opinion am i to tell my husband not to say anything to my children or what
2007-02-04 06:42:00 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
children father is not willing to meet with current husband to discuss anything all he ever says is he is he does not want current husband saying anything to his children
2007-02-04 06:56:17 · update #1
Your ex is a jerk. You already know that. But in your home, there are two authorities; you and your husband. You are a united front, with the goal of teaching your kids right from wrong. Forbidding your husband from disciplining your kids is bad idea. It will ultimately harm your marriage, and give the children the wrong message.
Good luck to you!
2007-02-07 16:39:45 · answer #1 · answered by ~Biz~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your ex husband that he is the children's father, But his children are living in your and your new husbands home and the rules and regulations are , what YOU say they are,Children need to know they belong and if your new husband is disciplining them then as part of your family this is right, Their old dad did not stay with them for what ever reason and he has NO rights in your house, this sounds like he is still trying to control you from a distance, and you do not have to accept it, go to court if you have to. Your choice
2007-02-04 14:55:15 · answer #2 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell my Ex that in order for you *both* to raise responsible children they have to learn to respect the words and actions of any adult be it your current husband. If they think this early in life they can pick and choose who they have to listen too then your Ex is NOT doing them any favors what so ever.
Your Ex has to grow up and but out. I would NOT discuss anything about it with him when he calls plain and simple. When he goes on the tyrant just say gotta go or say I'm hanging up now. You have to take control of what goes in your house and teach him just like a child that you and your current husband are in control not him.
Hope it all works out!
2007-02-04 17:48:31 · answer #3 · answered by Nicole T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you most definitely have got to let him be a disciplinary figure .you let him in to the role as dad so he has to have the respect of the children.thank god he uses talk as main form.now you can not take your ex out of the children's life he did that bye leaving. your new husband is the the new guy on the block .give him your support.when he disciplines them you have to support his decision.you can not be sending mixed messages to these kids.remember you are the adult.it is your and and and your new husbands job.not the ex. the major adjective is ex.in matters of the house it is you and new husband tell ex back off or live bye yourself!!!!!!be thankful he loves you and children to want you in his life.
2007-02-04 14:59:50 · answer #4 · answered by JAYHAWKER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set a meeting with your Ex and you the Step and any other step if there is one
Work out expectations all around
Work out how you all will punish for various things
The children will see that they are treated the same everywhere for the behavior and will probably Quit it
Besides its about the childs betterment not your feelings
2007-02-04 14:49:26 · answer #5 · answered by caretaker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think as long as there is no abuse going on there is nothing wrong with your new husband saying something to your kids if they are doing something wrong. I Say at the ages 4 and 6 they need discipline. Regardless who it from.Because if one person just lets them go do whatever they want and doesn't say anything to them. Then they are gonna be some wild children.Good Luck & Go Bless !!!!!!!!!
2007-02-04 14:55:21 · answer #6 · answered by carebear0404882005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your ex has to still have control over you. What your current husband is doing is fine. He is not spanking them or abusing them. He comes to you to have YOU handle it ( good idea). You are doing the very best that you can. Good for you.
2007-02-04 15:12:17 · answer #7 · answered by 2Bme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The children r in your care your ex has no right to stick his nose in continue to allow your partner to discipline your children.
2007-02-04 19:20:53 · answer #8 · answered by wildpalomino 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋