Today my mom gave me her debit card to go out and get a home phone for my place. I'm 17 and moved out on my own about a year ago, but I haven't had a land line until now. I also asked her if I could look for an outfit to wear to a job interview, because I've recently applied for a few part-time jobs...she said it was fine and I spent about 80$ on it. I feel bad because it seems like my mom is always giving me money...and I'm afraid that if I don't get the jobs I applied for, it's like taking her money for no good reason. I've done this a lot in the past, but I only recently started feeling guilty about taking money from people ( guess it's the whole growing up thing ) I am on a very fixed budget ( I have financial assistance for rent and only get about 20$ a week for spending ) so I can't really afford to pay her back. It's like everytime she gives me money, it's just another thing she holds over my head and complains to me about 24/7. Any advice?
2007-02-04 05:47:37 · 12 answers · asked by xoxo_sexy_biatch_xoxo 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm not allowed to move back in. My mom doesn't like me living here and the financial assistance I'm on is through child protective services...if I moved in everything would be a lot worse.
2007-02-04 05:54:17 · update #1
Did i mention she's a severe substance abuser?
2007-02-04 05:55:21 · update #2
ugh, are you people even reading this properly? i cannot move back in with my mother because of child protective services...I was in group homes all my life and since I couldn't move back home, they put me out on my own. My mom is a drunk and life with her is severely unstable. I am trying my best right now to get a job, because i do not want to rely on handouts...ahem leaving.florida chick, f you.
2007-02-04 06:06:38 · update #3
I have read all that you had to say and my opinion is this. You are out of the house because it was decided best for you. Great! You stay out. Now, you do need to get a job. Don't take advantage of your mother's card, buy a few inexpensive outfits (pants can be worn with different tops and look like another outfit) get out there and seriously look for a job putting your best foot forward and be confident and willing to learn. Your mother is just that, good or bad, perfect or far from it, she's your mother. Have respect for her and others and for yourself. Thanks her for what she bought for you, let her know you will pay it back as soon as you possibly can and that way, she did a wonderful thing helping you out when you needed it and you can do a wonderful thing and pay her back like a respectable adult. Keep your chin up and don't ever back down. Life's not easy but you'll do fine! I just know it! You can look in the local paper classifieds and see who's hiring. Lots of jobs only need a high school education. If you didn't graduate, sign up right now for ged classes and get your ged. You can still work and go to class since most employers want to see you get that ged for your future. They usually will work around your schedule. Be strong and appreciative of your mother's financial help.
2007-02-04 06:21:49 · answer #1 · answered by enjoyrselves 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
def. try to get a job, especially one that you would enjoy. There's a lot of jobs out there luckily you'll get the one you want. When you get your paycheck slowly pay your mom back depending on you. It really isn't good to spend your mom's budget. That could cause problems: one- you'll be use it and could depend on your mom a lot. two- your mom will just keep on telling you to find a job, stop spending money, you spent how much money?! things like that. Also if you don't have a college education, may I suggest going to radiology school it's about a two year program. Either be a radiologist or a sonographer. Good jobs good paycheck that would be enough for you to live on your own. But only if your intrested in the med field ( remember something you enjoy). Hope things will work out for you
2007-02-04 05:56:00 · answer #2 · answered by illegaltil18 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that you keep on trying to find a job, it sounds like you are pretty mature and really trying to find work, sooner or later something good will turn up and maybe then you can slowly start paying her back what you owe her. But eventually you will be able to move on with your own life and stop feeling guilty. Just tell your Mom, that you are trying to make your situation better and that you will definately pay her back as soon as you can. I wish you the very best of luck.
2007-02-04 06:21:50 · answer #3 · answered by Pauline N 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dear Gulity,
You are only 17 and live alone?? That is probably the problem. Ask your mother if you could live with her until you are 18. If she says no, she sounds like she is paying you to leave her alone. I don't mean to be rude, but maybe you should've got a job before you moved out. Let alone in most states in the USA you aren't allowed to move out until 18, where are you at???? I think that maybe you should get a roommate for a while, to help pay for things, and get another income. It sounds like you have a lot on your mind, maybe you should set your sights on getting a solid job, not for money, but for a long term thing, you will start earning more money later. Think about college too. I wish you very good luck...
2007-02-04 06:01:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
well it can´t be easy for you being so young & living on your own . but don´t worry thing´s will change . & if your mum did´t want to give you money she would´t . When you find a job & you have some money saved up perhaps you can give some to your mum ,although she won´t take it from you I´m sure your mum want´s to help you out . as she has a problem with drink & maybe she feel´s she has let you down so the only way to show that she still love´s her little girl is to make sure she has enough to live on. I wish you luck in finding a job . Sure something will turn up soon
2007-02-04 06:44:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Then stop spending mom's money...since she doesn't have the balls to stop you. I don't understand why you ask her for money, take it and then complain about taking it. Is she like forcing you to take the money? What's up with that? You're getting so many bad answers because your question is worded badly. I didn't think of editing my answer until you added some details. THINK before you act in all things and don't get mad at people who don't understand you. Giving people the benefit of the doubt is part of growing up.
2007-02-04 06:11:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep looking in tell you find a job may be child protection can help you you feel guilty because you are growing up i hope you find a job good luck ps try social service
2007-02-04 07:23:15 · answer #7 · answered by Summer G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You moved out when you were sixteen and got your own place. How did you manage that without a job. I take it you also don't go to school.You don't want to take money from Mom, but, you must be taking money from some place in order to be able to live in your own apartment.
What kind of job are you going to get? I guess McDonalds is hiring. Do yourself a favor move back home, get back in school . I have never heard any one complain because they got an education. Why would you want to spend your life taking hand outs? Go back to school.
2007-02-04 06:03:44 · answer #8 · answered by leaving.florida 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋
If it is true that you have been in group homes all your life because your mom couldn't care for you due to substance abuse, you have no reason not to accept what support she IS able to offer.
You are right, however, to want to become independent as soon as you can. It is better for you that you not depend on her.
2007-02-04 06:23:05 · answer #9 · answered by The First Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hey Jackie its me, Maddy! I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling bad but just like you said" when you get a job you can pay her back.
2007-02-04 11:32:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋