Would you ask your close friend why she did not put you in the wedding?

Question

My friend is getting married oringinally she was going 2 have a big wedd.& there were goin 2 b 8 bidesmaid me included. Now she is getting married in Vegas and she is having 4, her 2 sisters, her girl she just met 2 yrs ago and a girl she grew up with but barely talks to her. I was quite irritated b/c she picked them over me and we talk almost daily. I know all her wedding plans and she calls me for my opinion I thought but now I think she is just calling to brag. The grl she grew up with they got into an argument about the bride not calling her and asking for help but she calls everyone else like me. So I just assumed that she wasn't going 2 b in the wedd.b/c She called saying that the grl is jealous b/c she beat her 2 the punch of getting married, which threw but it's now my biz. The bride called & she has a wedding website when lookin at it I saw that she replced the grl w/ another grl that supposedly wasn't goin to be able to make it b/c her kids bday, I was shocked and under it

Answer 1

Yes I would ask. However be prepared for an unsatisfactory answer. She sounds a bit flaky to me.

Edit:
Just read advice from flappy: NONSENSE. A woman should ask people she feels closest to and want to share the joy of her wedding with. If there is some reason they can't, let them be the ones to say so.

Answer 2

Certainly I would ask, politely however, no accusations or rehash of her past choices. Or even call her up and tell her that if she finds herself without a bridesmaid due to circumstances, you would be a willing fill-in.
Weddings are very stressful times for all involved and her apparent lack of consideration might have other reasons: perhaps her parents, who are assumedly footing the bill, asked her to include the other bridesmaid choices. Perhaps she thought that you are too busy or not really interested in being part of the bridal party.
If she is a close friend and you inquire in a non-confrontational manner, I am sure matters will be cleared up.

Answer 3

I don't know if you have ever been married but that is a tough decision to make. I have 7 Bridal maids and there were still people that felt left out.
There are a lot of reason that women choose who they choose to be their bridesmaids. I had to have my bridal party pay for their own dresses... I had friends that I knew would not be able to afford that and I wouldn't have dreamed of putting them in that position.
That is a tough decision to make and the fact that she is calling you and including you in her decisions/asking you for advise should tell you that she wants you involved.
Don't put any more pressure on her! If she changed wedding plans then she might be having financial or other issues.
Weddings are stressful, don't be a whiny sad-sack... be a good friend and support her.
I am sure that she has no idea that your feeling are hurt and that she would feel terrible if she knew. Remember.... this is about her, not you!

Answer 4

there are a number of stuff to think of roughly while choosing your wedding ceremony social gathering. Does she have siblings? if so, what number? Did she opt to incorporate her fiance's siblings in her social gathering? Does she have another close pals from formative years that she needed in her social gathering? Is she limited to what number social gathering individuals she might have? If the solutions to those questions are customarily no, then you might desire to be suited to reevaluate your friendship. even nevertheless, if the solutions are customarily sure, then you might desire to only not permit it difficulty you. i'm particular your chum has positioned an outstanding sort of theory into who she had to ask to be in her wedding ceremony social gathering. it is an significant day. All you will possibly desire to be stricken approximately is getting an invitation.

Answer 5

I say definetly mention ur feeling about being excluded....However do NOT do it until after the wedding day... Im sure she is already being pulled into 100 different directions as it is... It could be that she considers you a new friend and or that maybe she feels your not as invlolved in her life as you think you are? whatever the case, do mention but be prepared for whatever reason it is you here.....some people are just that way and there will be never be a rhyme or reason for their doings.. good luck

Answer 6

When my friend of over 20 asked a friend she knew only 3 years and one of our group she knew for 16 years and her future sister in law. I was first very upset. I just did the guest book, but after the wedding I was GLAD. I also helped her in other ways. I think you need to talk to your friend. There are probably other reasons why she did this. Don't just cut her off and you need to get a thicker skin.

Answer 7

I would probably not UNTIL it came time that she:
Complained to me about somebody in the wedding.
Needs your ear to rant about something wedding related.

Then, I would prolly have to say to her:
You know what, if you would of asked me to be in your wedding I might actually want to help you out here. But since the others where the ones you thought you needed on that day then I guess I'm not needed for any of this.

Answer 8

Of course not, that would be rude. Hopefully you won't let this ruin your friendship - sometimes circumstances just change.

Answer 9

if your dead close u dont need an invitation, ur family. but if the situation is as u say and ur close enough then u can sure ask her

Answer 10

yes