my mum's having problems with her b/f, not violent or anything but he's just being an idiot, not paying his way or offering her emotional support etc. I want to have a go at him and stick up for her but my mum doesn't want me to. i'm thinking i should just have a go at him anyway and forget what my mum says. what do you reckon?
2007-02-04 05:05:50 · 22 answers · asked by colejoe79 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It depends how old you are, really...
If your mum expects you to be quiet, it may be simply that she thinks you are too young to interfere; she's being protective of you...
If you think you are old enough to have a go at him and are ready to take the consequences, then go with your heart; you are allowed to be protective of your mum, too.
2007-02-04 05:08:02 · answer #1 · answered by Nini 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tough one, sorry to hear you are so worried about your Mum. Id happen to agree with your Mum, mainly on the grounds that I think Mums worried about his reaction to you if you did speak your mind, Be there for Mum try and calmly support her, encourage her and remind her how well she does. I'm thinking that Mums the adult, and boy do some of make some Big mistakes in life, it could be the B/F is depressed, then he would need to see someone about it. IF he is just making the most of having "hotel services" without him not contributing and hes not working, then its your Mum that needs to sort things out. If hes working and not contributing, there is No excuse your Mum (again) needs to find the emotional strength to talk to him. Perhaps you have got a close relative or friend you could talk to about this I understand its really P***** you off, But Mum needs to change the way things are. Stay strong for Mum, if hes not being supportive in anyway remind her how well she is doing and perhaps ask her how she feels?
Maybe she will find the courage to change things.
2007-02-04 05:57:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you must be feeling but your mum is right - it may only makes things worse between your mum and her b/f. Tell your mum how it is making you feel. Perhaps even suggest a family talk where the 3 of you can sit down and discuss the problems in the household and what you can all do to make things better - I hope you situation improves because it is not nice living in a house where there is an atmosphere
2007-02-04 05:09:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think your Mum is right. Your Mum's a big girl and should handle her own affairs. If you get into the act, you are just going to complicate things for your Mum.
Right now the problem is between your Mum and her boyfriend. Don't make it worse.
2007-02-04 05:10:05 · answer #4 · answered by rm32 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will say you have to go and talk to your mum's boyfriend because sometimes if the situation goes beyond control some interferences has to be done,sometimes our mums turn to be overprotective even where is not necessary,his failure to support your mum affects you somehow and it makes you suffer,you have to promise yourself that you have to talk to this man and that you are going to be cool so that your mum will not get hurt or will not blame you for whatever circumstances may arise.
2007-02-04 06:00:29 · answer #5 · answered by peedee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of it. You only see part of the problem. Unless you are one of a couple, you never know what the relationship is like.
Your mother can figure out her own problems. If you say or do anything against the boyfriend that could come back to haunt you later.
2007-02-04 05:10:42 · answer #6 · answered by Blue 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you were in your 20's then yes but its not really your place to say. I would say some thing as I that sort of person. I dont like people getting used or hurt. Have another chat with your mum and try and get her to talk to him, she deserves better really. Good lcuk
2007-02-04 05:10:43 · answer #7 · answered by Pinkflower 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like she knows what you think
but is carrying on anyway so
it all sounds very dependent and so it's tricky
as long as you sense he will not be violent
tell him and appeal to his sense of being a man
if he has any sense of worth that a child needs to appeal to him
it will shock him into some decency hopefully
do it when she is around but not right there
but as I say make sure it's ok to tell him what's what
as he sounds like a rat and rats are often violent when cornered
rats are not men
2007-02-04 05:14:52 · answer #8 · answered by farshadowman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think she'll thank you for it!!
Frustrating isnt it when you can see your mum would be so much better off without this idiot, and she just cant see it, in time she will ....
and she'll probably need you then, and because you didnt interfere you will still be friends
2007-02-04 09:06:57 · answer #9 · answered by talula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please, for your mums sake, DON'T she has asked you not to, so respect her wishes, if you get caught up in the middle it will make it a million times worse...stay out of it, and let them deal with it, your mum has to make a deciion by herself.... whether she wants to keep this guy, or move on, it's a tough one for her, she is going through stress so dont make it any worse than it is, just be there fo her when she needs you...
2007-02-04 05:46:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋