Well, it happens about a year ago. My girlfriend is leaving my hometown to another country. So basically me and her having a long distance relationship. I admit I have to adjust a lot of things in my mind and eventually i managed to survive but ironically... alone.
Let's get to the main point. My girl having an affair with my friend ( and I never want to know his name ). I can't believe it for the first time, but right now I already forgive them all sincerely. A year passed away and I still feel like I'm in love with her but she never call me anymore, except when she need me for something. I made a promise to go to continue my study in her country but I don't know what she feel bout it. Moreover when we met not long time ago, she kicked me out from her house ( in indirect way ). Well, people, I'm traumatized by this case, I still have feeling with my-ex and I want to find someone new but it seems so hard for me because of cultural problem here. Any advice? Feedback? Thanks :-)
2007-02-04 01:27:37 · 14 answers · asked by wonderkid 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's really sad for how much you went through.
See, all I can say is that she is being very mean to you. She hasn't appreciated your love at all! You have to forget her!!! That's the bottom line! You cannot continue loving someone if they do not care for you. Well, alright you can, but it's pointless, because you're going to hurt yourself more and more. What's the point? If you're so interested in hurting yourself, there are other ways. See, you have to destroy all memories of her, and most important, never ever speak to her again. Do not ever try getting in touch with her. She doesn't deserve you. You desere someone much better. That's what God is probably telling you. He has made someone else for you. Maybe he did this all on purpose for you to realise that your soulmate is not her but someone else.
You are not able to find someone new due to cultural problems right? It's not such a huge problem. Try making friends with people of your same culture whenever you have the opportunity. When it's the right time, you'll meet the girl. See, whatever happens, happens for a reason. Although you may not be able to see the reason now, there definitely is a reason. At least, that's what I believe in.
Well, I hope I was able to help you. I wish you all the best for meeting your soulmate soon. And just something I would like to share with you: You can't go in search of love, it comes to you, and it just happens.
2007-02-04 01:44:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You deserve better than this. She is treating you badly, and she knows she can get away with it. Leave her and any thoughts of her behind, and believe that the right girl will come along. You deserve to be loved and respected in return. You don't want to live your life with someone he continually hurts you. There's a lot of women out there who would love a devoted loving man.
2007-02-04 01:34:28 · answer #2 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, its surprising you dont know your freinds name, or is it that you dont know him really, or you just dont want to mention his name, cos it hurts ?? Anyway, thats not the issue here. So lets get on, shall we ?
It may have been difficult, but you have anyway forgiven your freind and your gf for what they did to you. If it was easy for you to accept what they did, and forgive them, then it shouldnt be difficult for you to accept the fact that your gf is not your gf anymore, I mean, she is not involved with you, but only for anything that she needs, because she knows very much that you do love her still, and would make the most of it. Okay, probably thats a hard thing to accept. But its absolutely true, and I think you need to check your own dignity, and stay away from another emotional mess once again. And to top this all, she kicked you out of the house, directly or indirectly, you have only put it mildly in here, but for a moment being in your shoes, I just cannot understand waht makes you think that you are in love with her still....
You may have to really deal with your own feelings first. On what you truly feel. Dont fool yourself saying that you do love her, ofcourse you may love her, but you know very well she's not worth it. Consider all what happened, and what she did to you, and your life should just move on, without clinging on anyone else emotionally. Thats where you'd become a loser.
You living in the country where she lives has nothing to do with her, its just that she happens to be there too, but no one has the right to stop you, and to tell you frankly, I think that would be a good idea. Cos' living somewhere where she may be, could also help you to see the bitter reality up close, and probably would help you move on more quickly. Its all up to you. Want to carry on being used, and dumped, just be prepared to deal with the pain....or else, you could just move on, think of your own life, and find someone new without considering cultural barriers. Whoever said two pple belonging to two different cultures could not be freinds or lovers ? thats the strangest thing ive heard. And I think you'd agree with me ?
good luck
2007-02-04 01:52:16 · answer #3 · answered by arya 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK I am not very good with the love matter but I know where you are coming from...I think I know what your problem is...in order for you to find someone new you need to stop looking for "HER" in everyone you look at. If you stop looking for "HER" in everyone and learn to love yourself you will get through your little complication. You will also find someone that will enjoy being with you instead of not even talking to you.
2007-02-04 01:39:34 · answer #4 · answered by spunkie_6969 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for all you have been through. This girl is obviously not the right person for you though. You deserve for someone to love you whole-heartedly and unconditionally. Hang in there and you WILL meet someone. In the meantime though, I'd keep my distance from your ex. It sounds like she is using your feelings for her to use you. Good luck!
2007-02-04 01:33:59 · answer #5 · answered by leahcutie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must have really cared for her!!! But, if she is not reciprocating, you need to move on. Get on with your life, maybe it wasn't meant to be. You just might find something better out there. Why would you want to stay with someone who basically throws you out of her house??? You deserve better. Good Luck.
2007-02-04 01:33:47 · answer #6 · answered by winona e 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of that in case you prefer to purpose and have a courting with him and attempt to artwork it out than this is high-quality. yet don't get married any time quickly. you may in basic terms have an prolonged engagement. See how he act for the duration of something of your being pregnant and whilst the toddler comes homestead. If he ran out on you in basic terms understanding your pregnant, i'm specific his real hues will teach whilst the toddler arrives. i might nonetheless say you wait a minimum of two years to get married. you may desire to artwork on trusting him, and having a courting with him. And undergo in innovations once you establish to forgive somebody, you may no longer shop bringing previous stuff up. i think of it relatively is superb to tell him precisely the form you experience, what your fears and concerns are, communicate approximately them and notice in case you may flow on. communique is fundamental in any courting so which you'll be waiting to tell him precisely the form you experience. stable success!
2016-10-01 10:04:38 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that your ex is not the kinda person that you should be wasting your time with. Just tell yourself that you didnt owe anything to her and move on. You dont want to be chasing after another heartbreak.
2007-02-04 01:33:41 · answer #8 · answered by Ethan W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that you are traumatise by your past experience. Forget about it, let it alone and live life. Staying away from a hard person might also help.
2007-02-04 01:36:11 · answer #9 · answered by santos 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whatever the cultural problem, i think its really clear than you must let go of this girl. you're still hung up on her despite her being unfaithful, using you and kicking you out! come one, you deserve better! don't treat yourself bad. you're still living, breathing and available.
2007-02-04 01:37:09 · answer #10 · answered by Jade Ice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋