Why do women stay with a guy who beats them?

Question

A women is a special angel. They should never be beaten or hurt. So why dont you leave this low life cowerd?

Answer 1

sometimes they're scared,feel threatened,have kids no where to go,low self esteem

Answer 2

Sometimes situations can be complex.

1. children. if there are children involved, you have invisible ties. the guy will always be in your life because of the children. so why not just stay? it's difficult to find a new guy, who will treat you and your children good.
2. loss of hope. the lady, who loves this guy, and then he starts beating her.. she thinks "well if i loved him, there isn't anything better".. so they will stay, because they fear the next guy will beat her too.
3. attachment. if she felt extremely attached to him, she may just put up with the abuse and not want to leave.
4. learned behavior. she could have been abused as a child, so she's use to it. maybe he doesn't beat her as bad as her dad use to.
5. support. she could have no where to go, other then to stay with him. he could support her entirely, and if she leaves.. she will live on the streets. what is better: to live on the streets & possibly get raped or killed... or stay at home and get beat?
6. tricked. he could also mentally abuse her, and say sorry the minute after he beats her... so she falls for it, and loves to hear how much "he loves her", even though he just hit her.
7. cost. divorce is expensive! it's a giant headache and really expensive... some people would rather stay put then wander into the unknown.. have you ever heard of "fearing the unknown"? well, she knows what it's like to get beat, and she might think it will be worse if she leaves.
8. threat. i have heard countless times, the woman stays because the guy threatened to kill her, hurt her, or something like that. obviously she believes him because he hurts her now. i would rather be hurt then killed. but another saying goes "better off dead" and some women are.

there are many reasons. hope this helps you to understand.

Answer 3

Fear of themselves or their children being killed. The abuser has already proven he is capable of attempted murder via the beatings. Even a restraining order will not prevent someone from killing if thats what they feel like doing. If it does work and he goes to jail...he's not going to be very happy when he gets out. Unfortunately if the wife kills him first..she will probably go to prison and have her kids taken away.

Many people live with abuse as kids themselves...so if they dont have that high drama they dont feel loved. Some women dont know but fall in love with someone only to have it slowly creep up and wear down their self-esteem. Its really a catch-22 position (one that goes around and around).

I do feel for every proven case of abuse the person should have a mark etched on his/her forehead so decent others are aware of their tendencies and stay away from them to begin with (same goes for pedophiles that police cannot keep in the justice system).

Answer 4

There are many terrific answers there for you, all completely spot on. The biggest part is the fear of the unknown, and being used to it, wanting it because you feel you deserve it. Needing to be punished for all these imagined offences against the world. there are so many reasons you could not begin to imagine. Low self-esteem, not knowing anything different, love, loyalty, fear, comfort. Learned behaviour. It is a hard cycle to break and a very long road to recovery.

Answer 5

there are diverse reasons for that. One is that their mothers have been abused additionally and so the female thinks thats the way life is. Others are that they are afraid to bypass away -possibly he has pronounced he will kill her( and a few try this you already know) or he will save the babies. some are advised by employing relatives that they might desire to stay that they "made their mattress and can desire to stay" yet thats no longer genuine. Many have not have been given any the place to bypass and dont think of they are in a position to do it on thier very own. no rely what it sounds like on the exterior-they dont like it. yet are scared or maybe terrified to bypass away.

Answer 6

I heard that a lot of women stay with men that beat them, because the men not only beat them.

The men also use verbal abuse to keep the women's self-esteem low, to make the women feel like they need the man, even though he is also hurting her.

Answer 7

hi,
some women have been beaten down so bad that they don't know how to leave the person that id beating the. it all they know . the coward as you are calling him is actually a genius at controlling the person that he is with. he knows how to push the right button to make her do are say what ever he needs her to say to make it look like it not him but her and in doing so he keeps that control over her

Answer 8

the abuser usually works at lowering the womans self esteem tlo the point where she will believe everything he says and feel responsible and deserving of the abuse. it is difficult to leave because of the low self worth these women have.
even more difficult if there are children and no income. there are limited resources for the abused and many of them still have pride, they dont want people to know they are in the situation they are in.

Answer 9

I have a 30 year old sister and a 25 year old daughter, Both of them have abusive relationships. The reason they both stay really differs, What I see is they stay as a result of something missing on their emotional side. My sister wants a free babysitter and my daughter thinks she is in love. I cant seem to make either one of them understand THAT NO MATTER WHAT A REAL MAN DOES NOT LAY HIS HANDS ON YOU.

Answer 10

they feel scared to leave they think that if they leve theyll beat them more also maby becasue they cant stop loving hem no matter how much they beat them your probly a guy but watch a mary he has shows about that and all the women say that they stay because they love them

Answer 11

many times they are scared to leave but most often they don't realize that its not "acceptable". this is the only type of love they know, so they stay thinking it's the norm. or their fault that he got "angry"...it's a sad thing. it's a long process for a woman in an abusive relationship to learn to love herself enough to walk away and see that she deserves something better.