When my grandson gets tired he continuously says "I want my mommy". His mommy is working and I am babysitting.

Question

I don't know how to comfort him. I have tried to be understanding, by saying "I know you do, she'll be home later." He keeps saying it over and over and I'm beginning to feel like the villian that's keeping him from his mother. When he's not tired he doesn't seem to miss her, but getting him to take a nap is another story. I'm not his pernament babysitter, he gets moved around quite a lot. I feel this is part of the problem. I raised 7 children, and I can't figure this one out. Please help!

You have all come up with some wonderful ideas and I think I will try all of them. He did think we were at the building she works in once and it did seem to comfort him altho he didn't see her. I believe taking him for a ride would also help. I like the idea of the recording. I can't call her so that is a wonderful idea. I'll start working on these right away! Thank you!

Answer 1

he doesn't feel safe. you need to sit him in your lap and read to him or something so he feels safe with you.

Answer 2

Talk to your daughter about your concerns about his napping and stability. Maybe she and you come up with a solution. She could do things at home to help her son adjust better. Remember, as hard as this is, it is only temporary and this stage in his life will most likely pass.

A few temporary suggestions are...get some item of security for him. A bottle, blanket, toy or such. You could let him nap with his security item.

Tell him his mommy told you to rock him to sleep.

Have a picture of his mom and let him hold it.

Try distracting him with an activity he enjoys.

Come up with a routine that is just yours and his. Like eating lunch, watching a short program together, reading a quick story, then nap. If he knows what to expect it could help him adjust.

If he is old enough to understand, go into more depth than she'll be home late. It is probably a phrase he hears so much it has no meaning. Take him for a ride past the building where his mom works and explain where she is and what she is doing. Explain that as soon as she is done, she will drive to your house. Help him really understand what is going on and what he can expect when he is at your house. Amazingly, I find that when I take the time to really explain something, it helps a lot.

Answer 3

Some children get very cranky or irritable and upset when they are tired. You mentioned that getting him to take a nap is difficult, so maybe you could try some quiet activities like reading, coloring, or putting puzzles together. He may not feel as tired later, and less likely to think about missing his mother. Well, I hope this helps. P.S It sounds as though you are doing a good job. Good Luck.

Answer 4

I think you hit the nail on the head when you wrote, "he gets moved around quite a lot". Your daughter/or in law, needs to get a regular baby sitter so he feels comfortable and safe if you can't be that. Its hard for little kids when they are away from their parents, especially because when little they have no real sense of time. I imagine your grandma heart crushes when you can't comfort him....Think a more steady baby sitter and a routine would really do him good. Hope things work out for you and your little man....

Answer 5

He probably has trouble settling down to sleep because he gets moved around a lot, as you said, which makes children insecure sometimes and this manifests often in sleeping issues. Don't let it make you feel bad because he'll pick up on that and it will only make him feel worse. You'll just have to wait it out until he can mature enough to understand what's going on in his life. You're probably doing all of the right things, being understanding and supportive.

Answer 6

If it possible let him talk to her on the phone. The idea of going to sleep without having his mom around can be scary. If he hears her voice and knows she is ok and is reassured she will in fact be home soon might put him at ease. If he is left with a babysitter often he might feel separation from his mother. He might not want to go to sleep because he needs to make sure she will be back for him.

Answer 7

How old is he? Does he know that she is working? Maybe it needs to be made very clear to him that his mommy is working a job so she can support him. Kids are never too young to be told the truth. Mommy works or else we go homeless and hungry! (well, you don't have to be that harsh, lol)

When he starts to get tired and needs a nap, turn cartoons on and let him get lost in cartoons so he doesn't say "i want my mommy" hopefully that'll work.

Cheers

Answer 8

Get him a nice toy at night and a reward chart find his favourite stickers and if he does not say "i want my mommy" then through the night then put a sticker on then the more stickers on his chart the bigger reward he gets keep doing this for a couple of months and i garentee that he will forget and have happy sleeps through the rest of his baby hood.

Answer 9

U just answered your own question in that statement. The child keeps getting moved around from person to person. The only one he knows he can feel comfortable around is his mother. So..when he gets cranky. His instincts tell him to go for what he knows best. His Mommy.

Answer 10

take a picture of Mommy, put it in a frame that he can hold and tell him "Mommy misses you too but she has to work". or get one of those reocrdable books and have Mommy say " Mommy will be home to get you soon, I love you have fun with Grandma while I am gone" This might comfort him

Answer 11

Tell him that mommy is letting you take good care of him until she gets back and you will love him and hug him just like you did when your babies were little. Poor thing.