My ex was my first everything and it's so hard to move on i cant trust any guy with my heart because of the way he treated me. And it's so sad because very nice and responsible guy wants be to be more than a friend but it hurts to much cuz im afraid he may treat me the same way. i had my very first boyfriend when i was 16 so i was very late in comparison to everyone else. at first it was okay but he would call me and i refused to call him and he would get mad at me. when we would go out he would bring his cousins and his other family members and ignore me, he wouldn't sit next to me or even acknowledge my presence. other times i was with him and his family he would allow his guy cousin make fun of me. after a while he said that i need to ditch my best friend because she was weird and that i needed to stop being so "white" when I said no he would tell that “I never had a boyfriend before and that he’s only trying to teach me how to be a good girlfriend, Also he said i was spending to much time with one of my guy friends, that was only becuz he would always cancel on me at the last min. well when he convinced me that sleeping together would be in our best interest we tried it and I hated it and when i told him, his reaction was to yell at me and say it was my fault. Hardly a day later and he broke up with me. But he kept calling me so he could ask me stupid questions and try and convince me that we should “hook up” again not in a relationship but as “bed buddies” when I made it clear to him that it wasn’t going to happen he got mad and yelled at me and said the most hurtful thing to me “that I was only a little girl because I could take his [you know what].” He treated me badly and I cant get over it, I still cry sometimes. How can I get over him if im afraid to move on with someone else?
2007-02-03 16:06:16 · 10 answers · asked by kandi61689 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you have to pretend he's dead. DOn't talk to him. Don't see him and don't answer the phone when he calls. Erase his phone number and address. You can't move on if he's still in your life.
2007-02-03 16:09:14 · answer #1 · answered by Sharp Marble 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your feelings are completely and totally normal - even though your boyfriend treated you badly (very badly by the sounds of things) you still have feelings for him.
Don't be afraid to move on with somebody else, as then you'll realise that your ex-boyfriend really isn't worth crying over. My advice is surround yourself with people that love and care about you (family, and friends) becasue one of the hardest parts about breaking up is the loss of love you got from that one person. Nothing anybody can say will make this easier for you - I've learnt that through my own personal experience. When i got dumped for no reason from a 2 year relationship - i asked everybody for advice but nothing anybody said made it better.
I'm sorry he made you sleep with him, but take it as a learning experience - only do it if YOU want to, not if he assures you it will make things better.
Don't be "bed buddies" with him, as tempting as it may seem (to be with him in that way), the emotional side of the relationship is gone and you will be left feeling used and dissapointed.
Just remember not every guy is like your ex-boyfriend (If they were, girls wouldn't like them so much, right?). Good luck and it's only a matter of time before you begin to feel better - and remember, no matter how bad things look, they get better. They always, ALWAYS do.
I hope this helped.
2007-02-04 00:16:56 · answer #2 · answered by dee_em_cee_472 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dudes can certainly be confusing sometimes.
But in a relationship, you must learn to appreciate that relationship and the time you share together but you do not have the right while dating to place restraints on the other person - such as who their friends should be or how much time they can spend with family or friends, etc ..... you do not have the right to try and control the life of another person for that is abuse.
If you find you are not enjoying the relationship more than enjoying the relationship - if it is more work than enjoyment - you need to exit......perhaps remain friends but even that is up to you but needs to bare the understanding there will be nothing further.
You deserve the same respect you are giving to the person you are involved with.
If you see more burden than love, then just cut your losses on this one and learn from the experience.
2007-02-04 00:12:44 · answer #3 · answered by Marsha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't necessarily have get another boyfriend to move on..if that's what you mean. Occupy your time with you girlfriend, have some fun. Try not to think about your ex, it'll only upset you.
"Don't cling on to the past otherwise you'll miss the future." I hope this quote helps =)
And besides, there are plenty of fishes in the sea. Just because he's and ******, it doesnt apply TO ALL GUYS. You've made your mistake, and now you've learned from it, this experience wasn't all bad. Take some risk, the dating world isn't as scary as you made it sound.
Goodluck and take care girl =)
2007-02-04 00:30:48 · answer #4 · answered by jeanne1120 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't understand how you could have slept with him if it was obvious since the beginning that he didn't care about you... someone who constantly ignores you, makes fun of you and cancels on you cant possibly care about you... instead of getting more involved with him by having sex you should've dumped him... I honestly feel that you are too inmature to be in a relationship and maybe you should wait till your older because if you're going to let anyone tell you what to do as if you were a child then you're definitely not ready for a relationship... there's a lot of peer pressure and stuff and you need to be strong and not fall for it..
you need to stop judging all guys like that just because one guy hurt you because you'll never be in a relationship again because of your fear...
2007-02-04 00:14:28 · answer #5 · answered by sadgreeneyes3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i hate to say it but i dont think you'll ever get over that. but moving on and coping with it is a plausible thing. first off dont go looking for a new b/f thats the big mistake. make some new friends, guy friends. hang out with them, be flirty, but let them know its nothing serious. otherwise you will have friends thinking the wrong things.
basically you have to get to feel free more or less around guys again, and not worry about what they say or who you know. you need to be yourself, stand up for yourself, and when they start making you feel like crap, just leave em, out-right. thats about it, you just need to be you, and not take any crap from guys.
2007-02-04 00:13:02 · answer #6 · answered by d_sharde 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not, time does make it better. It helps to not call this person, or do anything that reminds you of him. Pamper yourself a lot and reallize, you are much better off with this jerk. Time spent with the wrong person is time spent away from being with who is right for you.
Good luck sweetie, I know it's hard.
2007-02-04 00:09:27 · answer #7 · answered by Kiss My Shaz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dude that guy is a douche, not all guys are like that. somethings wrong with that man
2007-02-04 00:10:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you have a round pussy but your boyfriend had a square dick
2007-02-04 00:08:09 · answer #9 · answered by jeenkag 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
time heals that...
2007-02-04 00:09:02 · answer #10 · answered by Jacob Da omniscient 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋