Let me try to summarize. I seem completely unable to bridge the gap between people I know in a class or see from time to time, to becoming people who are my friends/girlfriends. I moved to a new college back in Fall of '06 and now I am friends with as many people now as I was the day I got here. Most people I have met don’t have the same interests as I do and just focus their free time on drinking, clubbing or other events that I’m not a part of. I don’t want to INVITE myself into their groups, and they really aren’t the type of people I want to hang out with. But there are some people I would like to get to know better but don’t know how to approach that. I feel like asking them to hang out or go on a date would be totally blindsiding them, and they already have friends and a life. I know some people will say "Just get over it and do something" but its not that easy. Its like I’ve got a psychological block on taking that next step. And I will assure you that I’m a normal guy, not creepy or weird so that people wouldn’t want to hang out
2007-02-03 16:05:59 · 5 answers · asked by Daniel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Time may fix everything but How much time does it have to take? Life is so short and I feel like im wasting time as each day passes to really enjoy life.
2007-02-03 16:16:38 · update #1
It really helps if you have something in common with people before you approach to help you come out of your shell. You should try to sit next to people in class you think you have something in common with. Try to focus on one person at a time. And try to speak to them everyday when they sit down near you make eye contact but don't stare, play it cool, try to make small talk before or after class (You could ask if they got a chance to read or if they caught some tv show.) Most importantly ask them if they are having a study group or ask them if they are going to lunch and would they mind if you join. If they don't warm up move to someone else and don't take it personal. I am sure your a great person. I was at this same point when I was in college. I did not have any help at all and I never told anyone. Eventually if you meet someone outgoing and you present "open" body language you could get better results. That is how I made friend...other people came to me. You might get some counseling also. I wish you the best. If you see someone in need help them. Be kind to yourself.
2007-02-03 16:21:34 · answer #1 · answered by Carlos 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've asked the same questions so many times, i'm 1st year university and a long way from home too and it seems like everyone alreasy has a life. i've been told it gets better but I still don't know what to do. I also know from experience that any answer that starts with "just" doesn't work and is a sign that the person helping you doesn't know what your talking about. I gues just hang in there and don't always be afraid of coming on too strong.
2007-02-03 16:11:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry dude, Join the club. I used to be a extremly popular DJ that everyone wanted to party with. Ton's of girls ect...
I've found in life things really do repeat themselves. It's just being patient enough to wait for it to happen. Do what makes you happy, don't live up to others exspectations. eventually it'll happen. This is one of those "no wrong answer questions" I've been in a long record breaking 3 year slump. Depression comes with the territory. Keep busy.
2007-02-03 16:19:11 · answer #3 · answered by Grand Eminence 1 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Take some time off. Don't worry so much. Time fixes everything.
2007-02-03 16:10:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
your just shy so try sayin what comes to mind
2007-02-03 16:09:46 · answer #5 · answered by chaosshade16 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋