Do you think I was wrong for refusing to lock my dog up for a visitor?

Question

I have two dogs and one of them is a pit bull. Well an associate of of mine wanted to come over my house and asked me if I would lock him in the room before she came. I politely told her that I do not lock my dogs up when visitors come over because it causes too much stress for the animal. I offered to put the dog in a "down stay" but she said no and refused to come over. My dog is not vicious; I have three small children at home and never once has he as much as nipped at them. He has had professional obedience lessons and is very well trained. I feel that the only reason she wants me to lock him up is because of his breed because she didn't say anything about the other dog. For me that is not a good enough reason. If she were allergic I would have considered it. I just don't believe in locking them up when a guests come over because it causes them to not like strangers, dogs should be socialized. Do you think I was wrong for my decision. I felt kind of bad for telling her no.

The reason that I don't want to lock him up is because he will cry and scratch the door if he is locked up. Also his trainer has advised us not to lock the dogs up for guests because it causes them to dislike strangers. If I put him in a down stay, he won't get up unless I give him a command to do so. He has had $1200 worth of obedience training and is very well behaved. If he were a bad dog I would have locked him up without question.

Answer 1

Did you consider putting the dog in question on leash?

It would give the security the friend wants, yet the closeness your pit bull wants. Put the leash on, give the command ' down, stay' and then turn your attention to your friend. If she sees it as a done deal, then hopefully she will relax and warm up to the fact the dog is not going to hurt her.

Answer 2

I understand about the dogs, and their training. I do not want you to break their training, or abuse them in any way.
Understand that some people are afraid of dogs, for good reasons. It might have nothing to do with the breed of the dog, and everything to do with being bitten before.
I have been bitten three times, but thankfully, am not afraid of dogs. And, my friend's daughter has a pit bull, who is a big overgrown teddy bear. But I am smart enough to be non threatening around the humans in the house, I've no doubt that he would tear my throat out if I looked like I was going to harm someone.
If it were my pit bull, I would be cautious, if he did bite, you could be very liable, and likely to lose the dog, risk the authorities having him put to sleep if he does. A fearful person in the room with a strong dog is not a good combination. It is a dog's natural instinct to dominate weaker animals, humans included. Your statement that the dog needs to socialize, worries me. I would not socialize the dog at the potential expense of the humans involved.
Be careful of putting your pets needs in front of people's needs. I'm sure the associate feels less than good right now, and really does not understand why you chose the dog over her.
Call her and explain, and next time, perhaps chose a place to meet other than your house. There is an association about pit bulls, perhaps give her the web address so she can read up on the breed, so she will not be so fearful. I will try to find it, my friend's daughter has it. check back in with you if I find it.
Give the dog's a pat and a biscuit for me.
http://www.pbrc.net/breederinfo.html, and when there, go to breed info.

Answer 3

I'm scared of dogs, after several bad experiences (the dogs started it -people say 'they can smell you're afraid' but I wasn't at first, I liked them as a child & was taught how to behave around them by a dog-loving dad... there really are dog people and cat people.. however that's another topic). So I won't come over if your pitbull is in the room. However I also don't think it's even the LEAST bit rude you won't lock up your dog! If it's been me I would've said we'd meet somewhere else and never given it a second thought. It's your private home and also his home. Now if you refused to call & leash him if I met you on the street, that'd be different, that'd be rude and inconsiderate. But at home? No problem whatsoever.

Answer 4

When you choose to have a pitbull, you have to understand the fears associated with the breed. I think you should've locked the dog up. The lady's obviously scared. Some visitors will come around slowly to where you can introduce the dog if you show consideration for their feelings. They have to develop trust. There are other opportunities to socialize your dog. What about your friend?

By the way, pitbulls are generally a very sweet breed, and I'm the biggest dog lover on the planet, so I empathize. Dogs are part of the family and it hurts to lock them away when you know they're excited about visitors.

Answer 5

I despise dogs in general and pit bulls in particular but it IS your home and therefore your decision as to where your dogs are. Believe me, I hate dogs and with that prejudice I have tried to find something wrong with what you did and I can't. She was rude.

On the other hand, having good manners indicates that one does what is necessary to make one's guests comfortable. She was wrong to ask but you were rude to flatly refuse. Next time suggest meeting for coffee.

P.S. When I was 14 and visiting a friend, her father's obedience trained doberman pinscher bit me on the leg with no warning. Just came over, sniffed my leg and bit my knee. There was no provocation whatsoever and my friend's father had to wrestle the dog for a few minutes to get it off my leg as it's jaws had locked. This dog had years of training, so nothing is guaranteed.

Answer 6

I think you could have been more imaginative in dealing with this situation. I also think that I don't know all the details. It may have been appropriate for you to respond as you did. You have a responsibility to protect guests in your house. If the guest felt threatened, then you have a responsibility to do all that is reasonable to relieve that stress or feeling of threat. Since she was not actually in your home, that makes things different. You don't have a responsibility to make a stranger feel welcome unless you choose to do so. If you invited her, then it is on your shoulders to make her feel welcome. If she is not invited, then you have no obligation to make her feel welcome.
I also believe that you could physically restrain the dog without harming the dog. I use a leash on my dog in public. In private, my dog is in a fence. She has only been violent in self-defense. She was not in any harm, but she didn't know that. As a consequence, I choose caution.
Again, I get the idea that I am missing much of the story. I cannot say that you were wrong. I suspect you could have done better. At this point don't second guess yourself. All is well. Good luck!

Answer 7

As a courtesy for your visitor and any other visitor even if they don't ask you to put your dog "locked", may be not "locked in a room" but you could buy one of those baby gates that are also use to keep the dog somewhere and not letting him out, I have two cute Lhasa apso, very friendly, but I ALWAYS put them on their kennel/house, so they don't bother when I have visitors, they are very docile but some people are not just dog lovers, so I don't know who loves and who doesn't like to be bother by dogs, so...If I invite people to come over I want them to feel as comfortable as their own home...why would I invite them over if I don't show them a little of respect and consideration, right!?, so no matter what kind of dog you have...you should always put your dog in a place where they don't bother your guests, if you don't feel comfortable doing that....then don't invite people over to your house and you will avoid this problem!

Answer 8

I am a dog lover and have 3 of my own. One is a miniature schnauzer, one is a bassett/beagle mix and one is a boxer/pit mix. I treat my dogs like children, however I am also aware that some people are uncomfortable with dogs of any kind....even the little one. If I have someone coming over who I know is uncon=mfortable with animals, I put them in the bedroom with toys and they are fine and I can visit with the person. I think it is the polite thing to do.

Answer 9

That was extremely disrespectful of you. You should have put the dog in a locked room.

She did not ask for your other dog to be locked away. She was just scared.

Humans can get verys scared of dogs even if they like them very much. Pitbulls can attack without notice. And even if you did not lock him up and she was in the house, dogs can sense someone's fear of them and this just might provoke something in your pitbull.

You would not want something serious to happen, now would you? Really now. Shame on you. And you sound so anal, sorry to say, for doing what you did.

From an animal lover, who is also a vegetarian.

Answer 10

I would comply bc some people are so afraid or uncomfortable they cannot cope and they don't know your dog like you do. I don't think it's unreasonable if she is that fearful.

Once, as a child, I was petting a dog and it bit me right below my eye. Lucky for me it didn't affect my love of dogs or make me fearful. Some people *are* fearful and it's not right of you to judge their fear.

We've had a german shepherd and a doberman, both highly intelligent animals which obeyed commands well. They were obedience trained. Once our GS reacted oddly to an individual on our property and we had to call him off, but he listened bc he was of good pedigree and properly obedience trained.

Otherwise you'll have to meet her elsewhere.