Protecting whats mine or am I just being stupid?

Question

I am dating a guy who has had some female friends before we met that he has know for some time. During our 6 month time we have both been very open and honest with one another as I have left many bad relationships and he has had one. A female friend called crying and boo hooing and asked to stay for a while until she got her money together. We were suppose to have our time together but I cancelled. My b/f sent me an e-mail asking for a time frame of how long we were going to hang out as I usually have something to do the next day and do not spend the night. I am uncomfortable going over to his house and sleeping with him possibly while some unknown strange woman is there so i just cancelled our "date". I do not want to ruin what we have b/c he is great marriage potiental and we have a great relationship, communication, but how do I ask him what the f--k is this all about w/o prying and getting defensive. I just really feel threatend.

Answer 1

WOW, I would of been made if my boyfriend let his female friend move in with him. There are just some things you don't do and thats one. Unless you both live togeather and you both are friends with this girl then I would not want that going on eather.

You said you guys are honest and open with each other so why let it stop here? I'm guessing if he is really a good guy like you say then just sit him down and say, "Hey, I don't want to sound like the jelous type or anything but it really makes me feel uncomfterble to know that this other women is living with you. Is there any way that you can help her in other ways then letting her live with you? Maybe he can help her find a job or get another apt. Something, I'm sure she has other friends or family she can stay with" And if he says no, then say, "Ok, but I don't feel coomfterble staying the night knowing she is there. So until she finds another place to live I won't be staying the night."

Trust me, if he loves you he will want you staying the night with him in his bed, not a female friend who sleeps on the sofa.

Answer 2

I don't think that u should feel threatened, becuz if the 2 of them wanted to be together or even had feelings for each other then I am quite sure they would have done something about them before. The problem that I do see is that he has been friends with them before u, so y would u want to not only screw up ur relationship but their relationship as well. I am a strong believer that males and females can be friends without an sexual feelings at all. U just have to learn to trust him and have trust in your relationship and it will all work out for the best.

Answer 3

If you trust him, the friend should be allowed to stay but a short term date must be set that she be out. That would be hard and he could just tell her it's not appropriate with the two of you being together but as a friend, he can help out for a little while. If you both don't know her, you need to get to know her. Spend time over there and don't be embarassed to hang out or stay because it's your man and that's where it's at for right now. Keeping yourself away is the worst thing you can do. Especially with this now!

Answer 4

I knew a guy like that. He actually was marriage material and trustworthy but he couldn't say no to a woman in trouble. He had lots of female friends and they always call him when they need help and he goes running. Not because he is a player but because he is a good guy and the women know it and kind of take advantage. Just tell him that it bothers you and have an open and calm discussion about it.

Answer 5

Child, first of all he wouldn't have her stay over to his place without even acknowledging my feelings, true his female friends was there first , but that does not mean that you should keep on cancelling your time with him; you aren't doing anything but pushing him closer to her needs than yours. Don't feel threaten especially if both of ya have good communications. **** go over there introduce yourself get acquainted. The more you know the better you feel!!





Best Wishes,


Kimberly H

Answer 6

sounds such as you have been doing each little thing suited and your mom has ruined the completed technique of elevating a balanced domestic dog. i've got self assurance very sorry for you, you of course can not go away the "devil canines" lol, alongside with your mom as she has definitely no theory what she is doing and has been ignoring what you have been attempting to do related to crate and so on. The canines would be unable to be relied on around infants. in case you are able to then get a behaviorist in, yet consistent with probability your ultimate guess is re homing the b*tch with somebody who's keen to put in the attempt and time. The canines could maximum probable be positioned to sleep interior the united kingdom, or it may might desire to be muzzled and in no way allowed off the lead. it is somewhat as much as you, I definitely have had the comparable journey with my sister who refused to coach her canines (border collie) and that i informed her to the two re abode the canines with a suited family individuals or i could take it to the rescue centre myself the place it would desire to be positioned to sleep. that's now a working canines on the moors in Devon and is a distinctive canines all jointly.

Answer 7

Talk to him. It's okay to admit you don't feel right about her staying there...just don't imply it's due to a lack of trust you have for him (unless it is). He should be understanding of the awkward situation this has placed you in. Give it a week or two to get this girls stuff together and then suggest it needs to change.

Answer 8

Why dont you just tell him how you feel and basically say what you just asked? Let him know how you feel.

Answer 9

try telling him the truth,about how you feel...if he loves you he will understand and talk to you about it...

Answer 10

Talk to him...Work it out or get out...simple!