single mother dating - what does she want most?

Question

Single moms...what are you looking for in your future mate? If you were financially secure would that make a difference? If you were in debt digging your way out slowly, would you think differently?

It is hard to know when your mature gf has alternative motives.

Answer 1

The single moms I know don't want money for bills, some have a hard time, but they do it themselves.
What I hear that they want is for someone to share their ups and downs, not the bills, not the kid, just to not feel lonely, knowing someone loves you.

Answer 2

I'm also 36 and the single mom of two kids- a 17 year old and a 14 year old.....I'm not looking for "financial security" or a father for my kids. It's all about companionship.

However, I think many men who get into relationships with single mothers automatically assume that the woman wants his money- I'd look at her situation for her- does she work? Is she financially "stable" for the most part? If she's digging herself out of debt- that's her deal- but does she always lack money for basic needs? If that's the case, then yes, she may be seeking a "paycheck" in the form of a man.

I work- always have. I have debt, that comes from being a mom raising two kids alone- if I were to marry someone, I would certainly expect that he contribute financially to my household, just as I would if I didn't have children.

I've found that many men look at single mothers as these money-grubbing females who aren't truly in the relationship for the companionship it offers. I'm a mother, but I'm also a woman.

I think you might also find that single mothers can make wonderful mates. They understand what struggling looks like. They understand what it's like to be "on their own", and can appreciate having someone elses back if they have theirs.

Answer 3

As a single/ divorced mother of 3 girls, I would have to say we want security. A man who is willing to and can be of assistance both financially and emotionally, since raising children on your own is hard. I think most women make the mistake of allowing the new mate to immediately "parent" the children. Ive never done it, but, Ive seen it and the outcome can be disastrous. I think even when we are financially secure we would still want someone who could fill in the gaps, children provide many many monetary surprises... Just be patient don't rush in trying to save her, but, assure her that if/ when she needs you ( the key word being need), you'll be there

Answer 4

I a single mom 36 and I really never look at the guys pockets so is not about money...In my place when I am dating I make sure my 2 kids never know... Well they will never know...If I am dating someone that is going serious yes they will have to know...Because he will be the person that mom is going to marry... All I care is about a mature male, fun and that is not a drama queen...I hate that!!! And that doesn't want me to do the finacial life for him easy no way... Ofcourse I am not looking for somebody to race my kids...I really don't nedd any economic help whatsoever so...Thats why I am single and dating with out attachments...And having fun...I always want to be a single mom of a boy and a girl I have them and thats alll I care but male in my life? I don't worry at all...It have to a smart person to be able to live with us at home...Life is beautiful!!! And I have a wonderful life... So I think if one day a good man come along welcome if it don't, so I will be happy with out any partner...I have so much to do and no time... THAT IS MY OPINION...So you just have to know what you do want with that single mom...I see people feel lonely, That is something that I never meet in my life so...

Answer 5

someone caring and loving. and who will supports them.