was always scared of havin girlfriend!?

Question

from a young age me dad always took the P*ss out of me if i had a gf at every opportunity me sis too. it got to the point that i would turn girls down cause i wa terrified they would find out and could not handle no more teasing about it.

This has sort of programmed me to think its something to be ashamed of and i never really had a serious g/f cause of the above reason, even though i wanted one more than anything. i recently had a relationship after forcing myself into it and it lifted my depression but i kept it a secret from most people, cause it feels normal to me to do that. now i depressed again, even now i got a few girls that like me but i in the same boat as before my ex where i miserable and dont wanna go for it. have i got some sort of aniexty that makes me think its wrong even though i want it but me mind says its bad for me cause the things that happened in the past and i musn't do it and i gettin depressed cause i unable to see it as a good thing even though i know it

started therapy after relationship ended but it going sh*t. they want me to set targets and stuff but i aint got a clue what i want to be honest dont care too much cause i so low

had a gf and it was great

Answer 1

i'd recommend cognitive behavioural therapy to help you cope - you won't get any sensible advice here

Answer 2

I too suffer from depression and often didnt really go for boys as the idea of rejection was too much. as i got older i thought what the hell, met a lovely guy and now have a six month old baby and extremely happy with my life. Let your self go and enjoy life

Answer 3

this behavior from your family is wrong
they should not tease you
in fact this day in time they should be pleased that you like girls
but on the real note if you are young this behavior could affect you emotionally as you get older and you will grow up thinking that there is something wrong with women.
talk to the priest at your church and also talk to God and if this doestnt help talk to your guidence counselor at school because this is unfair behavior from your family

Answer 4

You are just under too much pressure. Dont rush because too much speed in those case mostly end it faster than it get started. You dont only have to learn women needs but also must find yourself wanted to fullfill them. When you will be sure you want to date with some special girl you will do as much as is needed to be with her. Dont worry too much about making mistakes before they really happen. Girls dont only like confidence in boys but this feature is needed to make everything to maintain relationship. Believe me it is simple to be brave. Just use power of fear that makes you thik you are coward to use its force to do something invertial. For example when you want to say something to amuse girl but you are hasitating from many reasons just say it even when the chance of success is near 50 %. You must find "predator instincts" in you and hunt coping with mi misses even 9 to 10 "strikes". Good luck (it is also needed :)...

Answer 5

Have you tried boy friends? It might help you get around being afraid of girl friends?
Had same problem so i moved away from family and didn't say anything to familyuntil engaged. I gave them no chance to interfere and today am happily married.

Answer 6

Having a girlfriend is perfecly normal. Are you sure it's because of what they teased you about? Or do you feel something for your own sex? If you do, please understand that it is not a choice, it's in your genes. Either way, love is ok.

Answer 7

shauna m .go to priest come on that will only lead to more problems personally i think u should turn gay then see who s laughing