i got married in may of last year iam 32 years old and this
is my first marraige. a month after we got married we moved
out of our parents home and got an appartment for the time
being while we saved up our money to buy a new home for this year. november 1, 2006 we had to move out of our apparment
becaurse the landlord was coming in without our consent i know this because he has came in on me three times without calling
and things were coming up missing. we moved back into
our parents home seperately because neither one of our parents wanted us in their home living together. we just bought our new home and we move in march 1, 2007 we have to come up with $2000 down payment. ive been paying my parents rent, cooking, cleaning and taking of myself in their home. i get social security $673 a month and work partime for now. they would not let me keep my money this one time to get my house. was that right?
2007-02-03 03:08:46 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I agree that you should help out but it was wrong for them not to let y'all both move in. How much are you paying for rent? When my sister moved in I had her pay the difference in the bills like my electric runs $100 and she paid what was over that. And so on with the rest of the bills including the groceries. That is really how it should be. If you are drawing social security, you are not suppose to be able to work is that right? That was just my understanding of how that works.
2007-02-03 04:30:18 · answer #1 · answered by little lady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like your parents can't accept the fact that their little girl is all grown up now. Why in the world won't they let you and your husband live together under one roof? That's ridiculous! You are 32 years old and a married woman, and they are in a desperate need to accept that fact. It probably wasn't right of them that they took all of your money, unless they are completely poor and your income is the only thing that can feed them. But your parents should understand that you need to build a life of your own with your husband now, and that takes money, time and dedication. It seems that they are just a little too traditional. Perhaps they are jealous that they didn't have a house by your age and they don't want you to have one either...but if they truly love you then they should understand. Congratulations on your new home though, good luck! I would suggest for you to give a lot of distance between you and your parents after you move out again, so they learn to appreciate their daughter more!
2007-02-03 11:19:29 · answer #2 · answered by Yul'ka 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wait a minute, this has to be a joke, are you pulling our legs.. I am sorry, you are married, and you are living separately because neither one of the parents want you to live together. You move out because the landlord would come in to your house with out consent? You are telling me that you two could not find another apt to move into before you went back home? First of all, there are landlord acts in all states that prohibit landlords of doing that. A simple call to the police and an legal action by you two would have put a stop to that entering with out your consent. Then, I am finding it hard to believe your parents from either family will not let you live in their houses together as you are married. I think you and your husband are mentally disturbed and you may not be old enough to control your own lives. There has to be other apt. to live in until your house you are buying is ready. This is a very unsatisfactory situation for both of you. I find it very hard to swallow.
2007-02-03 11:48:38 · answer #3 · answered by NIck N 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No it was not right! You are 32 years old and if I was you I would not let them take another dime. If my kids lived at home or was in that situation first off they and their spouse could live with me. I would not ask a dime from them since I knew they were trying to better themselves and get a new house. I would expect them to clean up after themselves and help with groceries. Which you have done and I think that is enough in that case. Why wont his parents let you stay with them? Try to find away to save your money so you can move on. Your parents should be ashamed of themselves by taking your money. Especially since you are saving for a home of your own. Is there anyway you could borrow the money from another family member? Or get a loan from a bank? I would try to find a way to get the down payment so you can move. Then after you do you can make ammends with your parents. But dont give up on your dream! Dont let anyone take that away from you. Good luck to you and dont give up!
2007-02-03 11:29:22 · answer #4 · answered by helen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are living beyond your means. Your parents realize this and are refusing to enable you. Buying a house on social security and a part-time salary will never work. You and your husband need to come up with a plan and budget that will allow you to live together and control your own money. You don't say anything about his financial situation, but I'd suggest you both look for jobs before you look for a house.
2007-02-03 13:01:07 · answer #5 · answered by Wise Advice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first and most important you should of never split to live apart just because of the parents. You need to immediately get a place together. You parents are feeling like they won. and is trying to do what ever they can to keep you apart. You did not mention if either of the parents have bad feeling for either one of you. Not good, get out and be with each other NOW . I can not believe if you love one another that you agreed to this living arrangement Is there not other family or friends around?
2007-02-03 12:26:30 · answer #6 · answered by sue.strout 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why wouldnt each of your parents move in together if you are married? That is crazy. november was only 3 months ago. So you needed help for three months and they are giving you a hard time when you paid your way while you were living with them?
Seems to me they would be happy to help you get your first home together and not be such harda**es about it.
If one of my kids needed a break to move OUT of my house, I would do anything I could to help them. I dont think if you are telling everything the way it is that they are right in any way.
2007-02-03 11:15:36 · answer #7 · answered by Tink 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is not right. Why are you paying their rent for them. As you said, you just bought a house so you need to be saving for that. Talk to your parents and tell them that what their doing is wrong. You are married and have to live your life.
2007-02-03 11:50:51 · answer #8 · answered by Jaime A 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its called tough love and did you ever think that perhaps they cannot afford the extra expenses of hydro, food etc. thats why they have you pay rent. Or maybe they don't want to make it so easy for you incase you want to return again and have a couple of kids. They have paid their dues and probably no one helped them. Maybe you can get another job.
2007-02-03 11:17:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey I think if your parents understood your situation well enough they wouldn't have made you pay rent. I think taking your money is not right of them.I can see them making you clean and cook sometimes but they need to remember that is still their house to and
they can't rely on you while you are still there. :) I hope everything goes well.
2007-02-03 11:16:07 · answer #10 · answered by Smart Gal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋