Girlfriend is a civilian?

Question

I am use to someone yelling at me, going through drills and parade march, combat formations, getting up early in the morning and looking out for not only myself but my fellow officers. My girlfriend is nevertheless a civilian. She doesn’t understand me and sometimes questions me. There are times when I am on an assignment for which I cannot tell her what I will be doing, where I will be, who is there at the present time as she wants me to as this is classified information. She doesn’t understand confidential, secret, and top secret in their classified categories. She gets mad because I am unpredictable. Shouldn’t she be more understanding?

Answer 1

its a 50.50 thing.. just try explaining it in a different way how she wouldnt tell you all her secrets or she wouldnt spill a secret her other friends told her.. just let her know that whatever it is you cant tell her is because it is to protect you and the country your working for
luck!

Answer 2

When you're at home with your girlfriend, you need to turn off military mode. Still, keep OPSEC, but you don't need to treat your girlfriend as if she's your fellow officer. It's understandable though as a lot of training instructors have problems turning off 'TI mode' when they return home. It's just a cycle that you have to break.

I believe that you need to sit down with your girlfriend and explain to her that there are times that you cannot tell her about your assignment. Explain to her why, and be a little compassionate towards her.

Answer 3

Be understanding, and explain as much to her as you can in civilian terms. Eventually she will just come to understand that is the name of the game. Civilians and military personnel operate on two very different levels. Eventually, if it works out, she would become a military wife, and get used to how it works. I am willing to bet that all this is very new to her.

Answer 4

U need not to tell that u r in classified job. As they do care, thats why, little worrieness will cause lot of querries which u can not answer. I used to be in very light mood with my friend when happen to be I know my next assignment. Take care

Answer 5

Dear its not she who has to be more understanding but rather u .You have to tell her the seriousness of ur projects as these r unknown otherwise .As my friend is also from same back ground i used to call him THE MOST COMPLICATED PERSON ON EARTH but i my self tried to understand him ,any how he was not able to explain his position to me any way . There were so many incidents we break our relation,its fine now.All the best to u .

Answer 6

i like roberts answer alot. kudos to you robert!!

my husband is currently in iraq and obviously opsec is a big thing, but it has never affected our relationship, but generally the things covered by opsec are not things i really even care about anyway (except like return dates, but i completley understand that).

she needs to be more understanding and trusting and it sounds like you might need to be more compassionate. are you her first experience with the military? maybe she just doesn't understand how it works or maybe she thinks you're lying to her about your whereabouts...

sit down and talk about it and work on those trust issues :)

Answer 7

Either understand or be gone!!! There are more women, but not many patriots that are willing to go through what you are going through.

Thank you for your Service

Answer 8

Yes but I guess you can't blame her for being a little worried. Your lucky you have someone that cares for you.

Answer 9

You are taking the service too seriously. Lighten up.

Answer 10

Yes, she should be more understanding. Perhaps you need to explain it to her.