my bf sometimes makes jokes and he doesnt see the big deal when it really does affect me and he says that he dont mean to but everytime i tell him he thinks im trying to fight with him and how do i relax and let it roll off easily?
2007-02-02 19:34:47 · 7 answers · asked by ASHLEE 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
trust him
2007-02-02 22:04:16 · answer #1 · answered by simplegirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This situation requires some effort on both your parts.
For you; There was a time when I felt hurt when people joked at my expense. Here's what I did about it. I learned to see the humour when I messed up the things I did or said, especially potentially embarrassing situations, like a freaky trip and fall. It's usually very funny when we are witness to these things happening to others but not ourselves. So I learned to laugh at myself and next thing I knew, I could make fun of myself and invoke hardy laughter to myself and others. It helps to think of yourself as someone else. Also if he jokes about you try to find the humour in it and if you don't - "I'm not offended, it's just not funny" and sincerely be unoffended.
I believe you may take offence because he is someone who is supposed to care about your feelings and is degrading your character. Though there are times when a joke is intended to hurt, then it's not a joke, just cruel. The benefit to laughing at or making fun of yourself is the gain of strength of character.
For him; He may have to learn how to joke more appropriately, like not creating jokes that are aimed at character degradation, but shift gears and make them situational. Especially when they're aimed at someone whom he has an emotional bond with, this includes friends and family.
In summary, you can try to learn to laugh at yourself, even if just appease him (to the less hurtful ones) and he can try to have more consideration for your feelings. He may also have to discover that he may not actually be funny.
Good luck, hope it works out.
2007-02-03 04:59:53 · answer #2 · answered by Benevolent Enigma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is definitely a difference between someone demeaning you when they are "joking" and someone who is lovingly teasing you. Are you touchy when other people tease you or just with him? Unless you are ultra sensitive w/low self-esteem, I believe you know the difference - LISTEN to that inner voice!
2007-02-03 03:41:43 · answer #3 · answered by voycinwilderness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, it sounds like your boyfriend is being an asshole.
If you tell him you don't like him teasing you and he continues with it, then he's being disrespectful.
..and he should be punished!
..I'm kidding.
About the punishment.
But seriously, if you tell him how its making you feel and he's still doing it then he's just mean.
2007-02-03 06:09:53 · answer #4 · answered by Just Bianca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of Chuck Norris.
2007-02-03 03:37:09 · answer #5 · answered by super_6ix_4our 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
make fun of him too and see how he likes it!
2007-02-03 03:37:35 · answer #6 · answered by Trend 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U have to be clear...
2007-02-05 00:57:19 · answer #7 · answered by Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋