I found out that someone I am not in contact with but care about deeply is using heroin.?

Question

I was very close friends with a girl about a year or two ago. We did the usual low key drugs and drank together. We were best friends before that even started. I tryed very hard to not even let her smoke pot because I knew she had such an addictive personality. I have never been closer with anyone in my life than I was with her. Long story short she got involved with a guy and he warped her and convinced her that I was a loser. I never forgave her and we are acquantices now, with deep wounds. I am drugfree now. I still care about her very deeply. She became a pothead. I found out today that she is using heroin. She is not even 17 years old. This is not the country it is washington DC. Her father died about 2 years ago and her mother gave up trying to protect her a long time before that. I was the last person to find out and I guarantee that I will be the first if not only person to act. Does anyone have any advice? Take into account I talk to her about once every 6 months very briefly.

Answer 1

I wish I had an easy answer for you. I've seen this same scenario repeat itself over and over through the years. The only thing that you can do is talk to her about seeking counseling and try to get her to go to a NA meeting with you. Don't let her pull you into her world. If you guys are close that might be one of her moves. Sometimes when people in that condition bottom-out they take steps to heal themselves.

You'll be doing her a great favor if you don't give her any money no matter how much she says she needs it, or regardless of the reason she says she needs it. If she gets arrested you might talk to her or visit her, but DON'T bail her out.

Once a person starts down that road they have to find their own way back. They have to find their own salvation.

Hope that this helps you to make the right decision.

Answer 2

It really sounds to me like u have so many problems it would be hard to think positive at all. But.. when God closes a door he opens a window and there are ppl that really care about you no matter how bad it may seem. I would suggest getting help with the addiction to the crack. I don't know anything about crack except it is bad for u, but it seems like u are addicted to it. which is the beginning of your problems. I think you love your kids-u r just a little shaky now and probably not able to take care of them like u want to. Well, I care about you and what happens to you, ok? and so do all the ppl on here that took the time to answer your questions. I have also been abused, but it isn't something I dwell on anymore since I can't change it. You sound like you are very run down both mentally and physically. You aren't eating right, but I have always heard drugs would make you not eat well. I do a prison ministry and the court system can be useless at times. It also sounds like you can't talk to your p.o.and that stinks--I have several imates that can't talk to the p.o.--you do have the right to ask for someone else which will be left up to either the judge or the p.o.--they have almost more power than the judge does. I think u have a lot of anger that is pent up inside you--just try and calm down and call the local crisis line and see what they tell you. U don't even have to give them ur name or anything like that. If u have a minister or church nearby sometimes those dudes r ez to talk to. A lot of churches have shelters that will help u,cause u sure need to get out of the crack house. I am not sure what's up wit the Masonic symbols--that is so secret where I come from--they don't tell ya anything. You sound somewhat delusional which may be the drugs talking and making u see and hear things. Get help asap.

Answer 3

The following informative articles may be shared either via link, or, print-out (with source & copyright intact). They may help you to figure out what your options are regarding helping her. Unfortunately, we can't force someone to want to help themself. But we can offer to be there for them, as long as it isn't putting ourself in danger to do so. Be Careful! Drug abuse Changes people, & usually Not for the better.

Drug Abuse--There Is a Solution! :
~ Who Takes Them?
~ Why DO People Abuse Them?
~ There IS a Solution to Drug Abuse
http://watchtower.org/library/g/2001/7/8/article_01.htm

How to Find Real Happiness
- Think of Your Spiritual Needs
- Keep Your Life Simple
- Happiness and Self-Worth
- Hope--Vital to Happiness
http://www.watchtower.org/library/w/2001/3/1/article_02.htm

How to Make Real Friends :
- We All Need Friends
- Satisfying Our Hunger for Friendship
- Good Friends--Bad Friends
http://watchtower.org/e/20041208/article_01.htm

When Someone You Love Dies :
- "It Can't Be True!"
- Is It Normal to Feel This Way?
- How Can I Live With My Grief?
- How Can Others Help?
- A Sure Hope for the Dead
- Some Practical Suggestions
- Texts That Comfort ... (etc)
http://watchtower.org/e/we/index.htm

Should I Apologize? :
- Why Is It So Hard to Apologize?
- Apologizing--A Key to Making Peace
http://watchtower.org/library/w/2002/11/1/article_01.htm

Sometimes the way to get someone to open back up, is to apologize for something ... maybe anything ... even insignificant. The fact that you're going out of your way just to speak to them says a lot. Someone on drugs, however, may not be able to notice ... );

Advanced Search
http://watchtower.org/search/search_e.htm
(can be used to find future-modified URLs)

Answer 4

I think there is probably nothing you can do. She is the one who needs to do something about it. Talking to her briefly every six months won't do much, but making it a point to talk to her more or spend time with her wouldn't be a great idea now either.

Its too bad that the two of you were doing drugs and drinking together at 15 or 16, but with two years having passed you can't feel guilty about what she's doing at this point.

Answer 5

Well she may not be too happy, but the best thing you can do for her is to get her help if she wants it or not. Maybe she is so hooked on it that she can not stop, or maybe that boyfriend of hers has threaten her, and she has been to afraid to tell anyone. She is still very young, and has a long life ahead of her, and a bright future, but not if she keeps taking that. Some day they will find her either on the streets hooking cause he kicked her out, or is making her pay for her own, or even find her out somewhere overdozed. So the best thing you can do is to get her help, and not arrested, but the help she needs, cause i really do not think that she is the one that got herself into that drug. And she really needs to get away from that guy and his friends. Hopifully someday she will look back on it,and see why you are doing the thing your are thinking of doing , and thank you for saving her life. Cause that is what you are doing. It is too bad that her mother really does not care, or try to stop it, cause she could of forced her into therapy for this. Gob Bless and keep you safe, and may things go well for you on this.

Answer 6

I was on heroin for a long time from age 16 to age 21. I just turned 22 and have been clean for 77 days. I wish someone had confronted me about my drug use I think I would have gotten help long before I did. Whether you guys arent speaking or whatever you have to swallow your pride and try to help her heroin will destroy her life if she doesnt get help. All you can do is try If she doesn't want help then move on. For some addicts like myself it takes something dramatic for us to change. Just tp warn you though the more harsh you come at an addict more we will justify our use and try to prove you wrong.. Soo you have to be subtle about it at first and then try to ask her to get help. I WISH I HAD A FRIEND LIKE YOU 5 years ago. Good luck

Answer 7

it is really hard to talk to people on heroin and other hard drugs..i know a lot of people who have been in recovery, including myself and no one can make you stop unless you want to..being forced really doesn't help it can just make things worse..these type of people will not seek help or accept they have a problem until they hit rock bottom. even then, there is nothing that you can do to help her..it is out of your hands. i know this seems harsh but she would get mad at you for even mentioning it. it is really sad..but only she can help herself and she will eventually..but probably way too late.
i'm sorry, good luck

Answer 8

This girl has lost most of her friends and her family so far. People have to hit ROCK BOTTOM before they change. Rock bottom is different for everybody, you hit yours and you are going places now. Keep going forward on your recovery, stay distant but available for her. She's going to need someone when she hits that rock! But you have got to let her hit it herself...don't "enable her" as they say.