last weekend my fiance & i went to my moms vacation home with her(a 3hour drive) under the impression that the 3 of us would spend time together. well we get there on fri night, her boyfriend is there, fine ok no biggie, next morning we wake up at 11:30 boyfriend is still there, then he leaves around noon. great now i can spend time with mom. all is well until 5:30, i told her lets start dinner (im 29 weeks prego so i was HUNGRY!!) she wont make dinner, just snacks.i thought that was wierd, then at 7 she starts dinner then tells me her bf is coming for dinner. i told her you know what im just going to go home, i came here to spend time with you and not u & your bf this is the 1st time ive met her bf and i felt that she was pushing him on me & she tells me that it is her house and she can invite whoever she wants over for dinner. i told her that is true, but i can also decide who i want to be around, and i choose to leave if i cant spend my time with just u. so i left
was i wrong to go
2007-02-02 12:34:33 · 9 answers · asked by miss me! 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
she had her own car, so i did not abandon her...what should i have done? i was really upset that she could not have spent one weekend with me...if i had known that she wanted to have a weekend with her bf, i would have chosen not to go. it would have been fine if he showed up the next day (sunday) and we met then, but we had plans to hang out (the 3 of us), make dinner, watch movies together and play board games...she told me that we could have done that with him too, i told her, that i did not want to spend my time with some stranger that i met an hour before, that id rather spend my time with people that mean someting to me...was i wrong? i feel bad now...
2007-02-02 12:35:15 · update #1
she invited the two of us to her home to as she said spend some time with her...
2007-02-02 12:42:05 · update #2
I think you did fine. You might want to look for a chance in the near future to make up the lost time with your mom, just to smooth things over.
Leaving a situation you are unhappy with is a pretty good way to keep it from getting ugly. People don't seem to like it when somebody leaves like that, but she would have liked it a lot less if there had been an escalation of events.
2007-02-02 13:38:04 · answer #1 · answered by cy ko tic 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your mother should have been more open with you and let you know she was not planning on making dinner until 7 because of her boy friend.
You need to have a discussion with your mother and let her know that you'd really like to have a weekend where you could spend one-on-one time with just her. Then she should tell her boy friend NOT to show up for that one weekend - I'm sure he will understand.
I agree, it is her house and she can invite anyone she wants over but when the plans only included you, your fiance and her - then she should NOT have invited her boy friend.
Sticky situation - but it's not really difficult to solve - there just must be agreements on both sides as to who all is invited on the weekends. If you want a one-on-one with her - then she must respect that and not have her boy friend there at the same time. If you want a weekend with her and him (so you can get to know him, depending on how serious she is) then that's Ok too.
2007-02-02 16:35:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are just feeling overwhelmed with seeing that your mom has someone new in her life. Being pregnant that you are , you can also be emotional. We do have a choice of who we want to hang around . But maybe you should understand that your mother is just making an effort for you to get to know him better. Tell your mother how you feel and tell her you want to spend time with her. Then you can make a compromise by spending time with the two of them as well . Most pregnant women feel helpless and feel that they should be given more attention . Be honest with your mom but also learn to compromise.
2007-02-02 12:59:44 · answer #3 · answered by bittersweetlove21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you weren't wrong, you had every reason to be upset. Your mom should have understood you wanted time with her and not her and her b/f. Your feelings should have been considerd before hand one cuz your prego and two bacause you're her daughter. dont feel bad you have every reason to be upset, she should apologize to you. It's good that you stood up for your self dont feel bad for it. Congratulations on the baby!
2007-02-02 12:46:25 · answer #4 · answered by claudia m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe you wasnt wrong to feel that way , but maybe your mom just wanted to have time with the 3 ppl that meant the most to her! also maybe she thought that if she told you he was coming you wouldnt have went at all . did you explain what you said on here to your mom ? maybe next time it should just be you and your mom , no fiance or boyfriend!
2007-02-02 12:44:51 · answer #5 · answered by mojado and loving it!! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you DID do the right thing, if she hurt you you have no right to stay there although, you should call her talk it over and maybe schedule some sort of time where you and your mom can do something together (like tea at a local hotel or something talk it through and she will probally feel as bad as you did)
2007-02-02 12:43:22 · answer #6 · answered by danceaholic345 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No i think you are absolutly right. She probably just wanted to see if you were lactating, bc her bf is in to milky mothers. She wanted you to let him drink from you suptle nipples. Just ask
2007-02-04 15:29:19 · answer #7 · answered by big d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she wants to important people in her life to meet and get along. I understand you are upset but you did not need to leave
2007-02-02 13:02:37 · answer #8 · answered by Big Daddy R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont' think so. I think you are perfectly right in what you are feeling. And, I applaud you for sticking up for yourself!
2007-02-02 12:40:23 · answer #9 · answered by Kelly M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋