Why do people think unspanked kids grow up to be criminals?

Question

I am really curious about this because the majority of prisoners have either been spanked or beaten by their parents.

Isn't it the discipline that matters, not the act of spanking? You can spank your kids all day but unless you take the time to teach them right from wrong you aren't helping them learn the skills they need to stay out of trouble.

Answer 1

I am very much for spanking, however i couldn't have said it better myself. In our home spanking is just one of many consequences for misbehavior. We chose to blend discipline and consequences together. For us this generates the best results. I think our youth or young adults are lacking big time. This is where I totally agree with you, they lack DISCIPLINE. There are many reasons for this: teen parenting, single parents, daycare kids, unloved children, abused children..... the list goes on and on. Sure I wish parents would use spanking more, but in the right way. Not just swat their children out of rage, then leave it at that with no communication. That doesn't work. They need discipline too, not just a consequence. They also don't need to see their parents losing their cool when spanking, very unproductive.
Just my opinion.

Answer 2

I think developing understanding in the child, is the key to behavior modification. That is after all, what we are talking about here. Changing the way a kid behaves, until they can do it with forethought and knowledge.
Understanding why certain things are harmful to themselves and others. That entails teaching the child that they are worth good things and should not harm.
Understanding why certain things are beneficial. Like if I study I learn how to do stuff.
Understanding what the consequences of ones actions are. If I punch my brother, I get no attention at dinner.

I think some parents have used spanking to vent, not to help the child. Those children feel they are worth crap and deserve crap.

It's also important to teach children how to be strong enough to resist peer opinion. They have to be strong enough to defend themselves both emotionally and physically. The key to that, is understanding behavior. "So if Jimmy is being nice, then he wants to get me in trouble". "If Rich is pushing then he's going to follow with a right cross". "I'm ready".

One also has to keep in mind that some people gain by having children misbehave. Those people earn money by having children in their system of care.
Every child has a special character. Some parents help the child define them selves in good ways , some don't. SELF-discipline, based on a good value system, keeps us all from becoming criminals. IMHO.

Answer 3

There's a difference between discipline and correction. For parents who try to correct their kids, strike them with hate, being unreasonable with them for whatever the case may be. You shouldnt spank your kids for making a mistake but for the same mistake over and over.
Discipline is can be shown through love and proper guidance. And if that doesnt work, the child deserves an explanation before he/she is spanked, or the development of his conscious will create an imbalance.

Answer 4

The problem being that few parents follow through with the discipline--they are too busy working, tired after work, and guilty about leaving their kids with strangers all day.

The parent's guilt leads them to do some dumb things, like handing the kids a bunch of money (not even knowing what it will be spent on), buying them everything they want, letting them eat whatever they want, etc. Most of these children are spoiled rotten, and have no respect for authority of any kind. This could land them in jail.

Answer 5

I definitely do not believe in spanking because it instills fear in the child. in order to properly discipline a child the parent must explain why that action was wrong and use the appropriate disciplinary action. But to answer your question - unfortunately some people think spanking kids "corrects them", but that is definitely not the case. Not to sound like a shrink but actually talking, understanding and communicating with kids really makes a great difference.

Answer 6

The people who believe this are wrong. I would bet that 98% of criminals came from a family who beat them, neglect them, put them down constantly, show NO love toward them, abuse them in everyway possible (including sexually) because these people do not know how to care for kids. These people will grow one of these 2 ways, introverted, shy, and hating themselves not others, or getting into trouble. Who wouldn't have the anger and sadness they have? So I say a definite "NO" to spanking (always have), and yes to kindness, love, encouragement, a sense of well-being, and kisses and hugs.

Answer 7

Spanking will not allow for the development of an internal conscience that's as strong as one developed by non-violent discipline. You're right; Spanking only leads to fear and the avoidance of the bad behavior while in the presence of the spanker.The real art of parenting is teaching your kids to do the right thing even if you're not there to beat them. Raising a thinking child is the goal, not raising a fear full child who can't wait till he/she can do the wrong things without getting reprimanded.

Answer 8

it dont have to be a spanking u just have to dicipline yo kids when they do wrong but people go to jail for their own stupid choices they cant realy blaim they parents for it cuz if they realy wanted a good life they would have gotten it even if you did get beaten when you where littler it dont matter because they know most of them grown and they know better

Answer 9

I think parents should spank kids for certain reasons.

Answer 10

i never spanked my son who is now 18 yrs old hes a good kid not an angel but im blessed to have him