her mom was so deppressed that he need to accompanied her mom to her bedroom and sleep beside her. we are planning to get married soon. what if he still planned that we should sleep beside his mom. will i agree to that plan? what will i do?
2007-02-02 07:22:39 · 12 answers · asked by frances chantal21 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Well first of all the mom will need to understand. Im going through the same my father passed away when i was 4 and eversince then i have been sleeping in the same room with my mom and im 22 now. its not thats she got all depressed but i guess i decided to help her by being there and it has helped i guess. im getting married in april and its hard for me to leave her but my mom understands and says i need to do my life. No you shouldnt agree to that. that would be selfish from her part to that to both of you, maybe if you talk to him and tell him you opinion and he talks to her she should understand. and just tell her that you will bw there to help her through this. good luck!!
2007-02-02 07:52:54 · answer #1 · answered by Happy Mommy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You and your boyfriend should try to help his mom move on and work on accepting the loss of her husband. Maybe try to get her to see a counselor or someone to talk about her feelings about her loss as well as helping her to find ways to get out more and socialize with other people. Also talk with with your boyfriend about how you feel and then the two of you should talk to her about how the whole sleeping in his mom's bed thing makes you and him feel and explain to her that he will not be able to do that once you get married.
2007-02-02 07:32:24 · answer #2 · answered by KELLI 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, if what you are saying is true...there's some issues there. Definitely some issues there. You may want to rethink your entire relationship with him because this is not healthy whatsoever. IF she was so depressed, she should have gone for counseling, joined a support group, saw a doc and got prescribed some anti depressants. Something. Anything besides sharing a bed with her grown son. I don't care of there is no funny business whatsoever...it is just wrong.
2007-02-02 07:34:11 · answer #3 · answered by Sunidaze 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Grief behaves strangely. Trust me, I know all too well.
This behavior would not be weird if it had happened only a month or two ago, but going on this long.......it's time it stops. Mom is looking for a replacement of her husband & she has chosen her
son. That is NOT healthy, for either one. Mom needs to seek
counselling in order to deal with her husband's death & her grief.
You're boyfirend, I'm sure, is trying to be a good son, & I commend him for that. But if he truly wants to be a good son, he needs to see that his mom gets the help she needs.
The Bible instructs us to "leave & cleave". That means that though his has a respect for his mother & not turn his back on her, his loyalty will be to you, FIRST.
Do NOT marry this man until ths problem is resolved. Otherwise, YOU will ALWAYS be the OTHER WOMAN.
2007-02-02 08:12:35 · answer #4 · answered by weddrev 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First i would talk to him and tell him you know that he is sleeping next to him mom. then you need to ask him what is going to happen when you get married. And then go from there but if you dont ask him you will never know. If you plan on living with her then you really have to talk to him and deal with this. And maybe seek some counceling for her. She needs company and help so maybe talking to someone about it will help. Good luck.
2007-02-02 07:56:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He shouldn't be sleeping beside his mom. The sooner he moves out of her room, the better. He needs to get his priorities straight. Yes, he should help care for her in a time of real need. But he shouldn't try to be a substitute husband for her.
2007-02-02 07:27:15 · answer #6 · answered by Feinschmecker 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I 'm sure he isn't planning on mom as third person in your bed. It just helps her to have him near her when things first happen and she'll gradually get over her husbands death. Just be patient it'll be alright in a year, no I'm sure she doesn't want to be in bed with her son and his wife.
2007-02-02 07:31:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
HIS MOTHER NEEDS TO FIND SOME GRIEF COUNSELING AND NO YOU DON'T SLEEP WITH HER, HE SHOULDN'T EITHER. HE MIGHT NEED TO TAKE HIS MOM TO THE DR, FOR SOME MEDS FOR DEPRESSION. NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.
2007-02-02 07:35:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would not marry into the family, you are asking for trouble
2007-02-02 07:50:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
is too dificult to decide because she is his mon, you must to give him time and he has to take de decision.
2007-02-02 07:34:17 · answer #10 · answered by THE BEST 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋