What is wrong with my sister??

Question

I am worried about my sister. I am married & out on my own but I stay so stressed out about her & my mom. They live with my grandma & all 3 of them argue constantly & even my mom & g'ma argue more. My sister is almost 16 & treats my mom & g'ma terrible. She talks back, she stays to herself, and she isn't putting any effort into school anymore. One minute she is happy & the next she is spitting fire. Just this morning she woke with an attitude towards my mom & didn't want to go to school. She cries alot & I really feel like she has anger built up inside of her. My mom doesn't have a lot of money to get things but she does get more than what I use to. She doesn't really tell me anything either. I guess because we are 11 yrs apart & she looks at me like a "parent". She has successful friends so why isn't she trying in school? I tell her all the time that her education is important but I don't think it sinks in. She's been ill-tempered since she was little.
Do u think she is bipolar?

Also her & her boyfriend of 6 months are having problems but she was ill natured before him...

I do try to talk with her but if she stays so mad all the time who wants to talk to her. She even snaps at my husband & boy does he get mad!! It's bad to say but sometimes I don't even want to be around her.
My mom & dad are still together but they don't live together...he is an alcoholic but my mom still tries to help him because he doesn't drive.

Answer 1

shes horny

Answer 2

Be happy you are not living in that hell house.
It is stressful and a terrible place for anyone to live.
Think about it, why wouldn't she she be combative and argumentative, she lives in it 24 - 7. That is what she has picked up from your mom and your grandma.
It is a learned behavior.
I don't know what they argue about, but I am sure alot is petty stuff.
A teen has a hard enough time coping with everyday stuff and then having to come home to a volatile inferno. No wonder she is ill tempered and grumpy and irritated, anyone would be.
It is her surroundings that have shaped this girl's behavior and personality.
It will take allot of therapy to change her from one thing to another.
This is not a safe place for her to be and she hates being there believe me.
She doesn't care about anything, because she is in a constant state of turmoil and upheaval.
She is fighting for her place in society, cause that is what she believes is normal...... she knows nothing else.
It would be good of you to have her over more often and do things together. Don't put her on the defense and don't try to mother her, she needs a sister and a friend and someone who won't yell and argue with her 24-7.

Answer 3

The obvious thing would be for your sister to quit smoking. That may or may not solve the medical problem, but it's probable that smoking contributes or worsens the migraines. Don't really know about anything else . . . Emergency rooms tend to be overworked and rushed, and if you don't have insurance, they can't really afford to spend much time or effort on you. All you get is the minimum effort, and then out you go. The reason for this is because if they spend adequate time on everyone, but not everyone could pay their bills, then they couldn't afford to keep the hospital open and they'd have to close down. So until the US gets some sort of National Health Insurance plan, your sister probably isn't going to get decent health care in an emergency room. So for now, the best thing to do is to get her to quit smoking, and use the money spent on cigarrettes to buy health insurance instead. Sorry I don't have better information . . . Best wishes,

Answer 4

Well first of all, she is 16, an age when teens are very emotional, which might be able to explain her irrational behavior.
Did the family recently have a trauma, like did the mom divorce from the father? If that is so, she might be missing her dad.

Perhaps there is something at school bothering her too. It could also be some other secret she is coping with. Try to find out. Get one of her best friends to talk to her.

Answer 5

Regardless of the diagnosis, sounds like your sister is having both the growing pains of an adolescent and the issues of mental health. Have your Mother schedule her for an appointment at a local mental health center where the charges should be based on a sliding fee scale. This is a family problem that may need the help of a third party who has no vested interest.

If your sister looks on you as a "parent" you may want to sit down and talk of her JOB of going to school. You may want to talk to her about treating her family/elders with respect. You may want to determine if she is using drugs which would cause many of the issues you described.

And, if you feel she is in trouble either with drugs or is mentally unstable, then you may want to have a very private talk with your Mother and figure ways to help your sister.

Answer 6

its probably hard to just live with your mom and grandma, especially when your 16. you already have your mom to deal with, now your grandma too. 16 year olds always have attitude, but maybe you should act more like a sister instead of parent, she probably needs you. if she has alot of ups and downs that you feel is not normal than dont mention to her, but maybe to your mom so she could say something to the doctor maybe. i dont know anything about what type of relationships they have together or what type of structure or life they have so i cannot say much. maybe there is something going on at school, a new group of friends or maybe she has problems with someone there. there has to be a reason, and shes taking it out on them. be patient with her, talk to her.

Answer 7

You are saying she she looks at you like a "parent". I think this is the point.You'd better try really hard not to make her thinkso.Don't ask her to do things in a direct way.try to give suggestions&tell her simmilar stories even if those stories are made up especially for her...try to be her friend & to hang out with her from time to time...because she needs some one beside her..but not a family member.So ,it's your chance to be her friend.Good luck

Answer 8

Sounds like she is just not happy. Try to ask her what she is so unhappy about. Did her mom and dad have a bad fall out and she was always there to see it? I do not know what her relationship is like with her father. Seems like she just has issues of her own. She may need to spend some time alone. You are her big sister and you should try to talk to her.

Answer 9

Maybe A little bipolar but you need to ask her what the matter with her and why she is mad and maybe take her out to the gym or some where she can get her anger out and when it comes to school it does suck but in the long run its worth it and that's what you need to say she just needs to do to approach her dreams

Answer 10

It's pretty normal to act that way when you're 16. Keep trying to be there for her, and encourage her to do better. She may well grow up to be just fine. But try to remind her that you love her, and be proud of her where she succeeds - in other words, don't just be critical all the time. She needs your love and approval even if she acts like she doesn't.

Answer 11

Here is the deal. You live by yourself and have a place to escape to. When you live with anyone for awhile your going to argue. Everyone argues, I don't care who they are. You are on the outside and are able to say, "Whats my sisters problem". But if you were in the mix, living with them and not alone, you would probably argue too. It's so easy to say when you don't live in the household..