you know how they say you are who you hang out with, well I have found out that 3 of my girlfriends are or did cheat on their husbands. They are good friends, been friends for a long time and now when we talk they know I'm a little offish, just not the same. I love them and listen to their tales, but have no input because I'm working hard on a relationship I am dedicated to, and a person I love with my whole heart, so what advice could I give them? I don't and can't imagine cheating on him, but it almost seems like they are enjoying this too much. I don't want to give up my friendships and I find myself wanting to say mean things, help?
2007-02-02 04:07:05 · 8 answers · asked by Cute Stuff 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
someone misunderstood, by thinking that I want to cheat too, not the case, totally the opposite, not all my friends are cheating, and as I stated they are good friends.
2007-02-02 04:19:07 · update #1
These friends are still the same friends they have always been. Just because they do something that you don't agree with doesn't mean that you should stop being their friend. I understand that it's a moral question, but as long as you are secure in your own morals, hanging out with them is not going to corrupt you. If they ask why you are a little offish, then just tell them politely that you don't agree with some of their actions so it makes you a little uncomfortable, but that you still love them anyway.
Again, I understand that this is a moral question, but let's put it a different way...what if your husband/boyfriend did something that you didn't approve of...what if he started drinking to a point that you didn't like (but nothing else was wrong)...or shoplifted a candybar...would you love him any less? Would you leave him over it?
Not saying the above things are right by any means just trying to give a little perspective. You should apply at least some of the same standards to your relationships with friends as you do with significant others. If they are as good of friends as you say you should be there through thick and thin. They are more than likely still the same girls you have always known and loved.
2007-02-02 04:33:22 · answer #1 · answered by red_writer2007 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the time has passed where you need to say mean things.Has it occurred to you that everyone who calls themselves FRIEND is no friend. They may be having fun with you trying to see if they can get you to cheat. DUMP them and enjoy your committed relationship. Really some friends are not worth the ground they are standing on. Find the right type of friends or end up unhappy. If they are this kind of friend then what will stop them from trying to mess with your husband. Lose them yesterday.
2007-02-02 12:16:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because your friends do it doesn't mean you should beat yourself up for not following their footsteps. Feel good and proud that you a re so happy and satisfied that you don't have to always be looking and cheating because you know what you want and you have it. Friends are all different. No one is the same. What do your friends mean to you? Do you enjoy other aspects of you r friendship. Just because you don't approve of this aspect doesn't mean you should end friendships. it's their lives not yours.
2007-02-02 12:14:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find a good friend with whom you share common ground. I, personally want to puke when I hear stories if infidelity. It happened to me. I will never cheat on my man and I never want to be classified with someone who does. You need encouragement for someone who has the same morals as you.
2007-02-02 12:22:30 · answer #4 · answered by just me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stop hanging around with them sorry to say because once their husbands find out the finger will also be pointed at you as being involved i would find me new friends sorry to say..
2007-02-02 12:11:37 · answer #5 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i love someone like you..who values what she has..realtionships are hard as it is..and i am sooo happy to hear that you love your man and will do any thing to make it work....i honor you...because i tooo..believe that when you have great chemistry and mutal love for your man...hold on dont let it go...next you dont have to loose their friendship..just tell them that they shouldnt be doing it...and they need to make their marriage work..or you could say something like yeah..wow..this new guy that you are seeing ..he must really be something ha...girl..stop..laugh it off..dont give too much of your input...because it is hard when you dont see eye to eye...good luck
2007-02-02 12:24:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them if a relationship isn't working, they should just end it.
2007-02-02 12:20:09 · answer #7 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grasshopper, it's time to move on and change your affiliation in friends.
Good luck!
2007-02-02 13:48:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋