My friends are having a girls night out, and I would love to go out with them and have some fun. The problem is I know my bf will be against it, we agreed in the beginning of our relationship that there is no reason for a girls or boys night out at a club, cuz it just tempst and asks for trouble. Its not that there is no trust, and I would bring him but its a complete girls night and no one else is bringing their bfs. How do I go around asking him? PS I dont lie, so I can't say something that isn't the truth, for example tell him I'm going to stay at my moms for the weekend. CANT DO IT. Any advice?
2007-02-02 03:37:20 · 9 answers · asked by FIT-GAL 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You need to renegotiate with your BF. There is no reason that you can't have a girls night out or him have a guys night out. In fact... it is very good for you to do that.
Neither one of you can expect to have nobody but each other, you have to have friends, you have to balance time together and time apart. It is a MUST for a successful relationship.
My wife and I have been together for 12 years. We enjoy going out together (just the two of us), we enjoy going out together with a group of friends, and we enjoy going out with just the girls, or just the guys.
Despite what you say... it IS about trust. You have to trust each other, and you have to trust yourself to not get into a situation where there may be trouble. If your friends are true friends... that is never an issue.
Do yourself a favor and sit down with your boyfriend and renegotiate. Show him this message if you want to. You will both be happier in the long run. Take it from me... been there, done that.
Good luck to you.
-33 years old and happily married for 12 years.
2007-02-02 03:50:14 · answer #1 · answered by Doogie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him. How long have you been together? You say there is trust in your relationship, why not talk to him about going out with the girls and agree on some guidelines. There's no reason to give up a night out, and it can actually make you appreciate each other more. If he trusts you and the two of you come up with guidelines, for example, you agree you won't dance with another guy, or you'l tell a guy about your boyfriend right away, you should be able to have the occasional fun night out.
I was in a relationship where my boyfriend didn't like when I went out with the girls, I didn't, and it ended up losing me all my friends. I broke up with him, but had to start over with friends, which is a hard thing to do.
2007-02-02 03:56:38 · answer #2 · answered by meh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the beginning of the relationship you two were different people, now that you are older, maybe you two should discuss both of you having girls nights/guys nights out once in a while. You have to have other friends. You cant just be holed up together with no other outlet. If you two have that much trust in eachother, then let loose a little, there is no reason to have such a firm grip on eachothers lives like that. I would NEVER lie to my husband, but we have been happy and married for a long time now and I think alot of it has to do with the fact that we do NOT control eachother at all. If he wants to go out, He goes, If i want to go out, I go. NO BIG DEAL!
2007-02-02 03:43:51 · answer #3 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think u answered ur own question. u said when ur relationship started u both agreed that it wasnt important to have guys or girls night out. u made the wrong move to agreeing to that cuz in any relationship u also need ur space to kick it with ur frendz. but if u really wanna go then just be honest and ask him that u know what the agreement was at the begining but that u wanna go out with ur frendz and have a lil fun. now, make sure u dont change ur mind and lie to him just to get what u want. trust is the key thing in a relationship, if u break that trust i can guarantee u it will be the last time u have girls night out while ur with him.
2007-02-02 03:44:15 · answer #4 · answered by oc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why break a rule you and him agreed on. But if you ask him and then tell him whenever your friends have anight out he can go. Maybe he will go for it. But most of the times when rules are made they are made without much thought. And also all rules ccan be changed also. So ask him then tell him, he can go out to when he needs to.
2007-02-02 03:43:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all....I'm willing to bet that it was YOU that wanted the "no nights out"....
Everyone NEEDS tima away from their partner, and if you cannot trust them enough to "let them" go out with the boys or girls, you should not be dating them in the first place!!!
Sit down and be honest with each other!!!
2007-02-02 03:42:37 · answer #6 · answered by Master Richard 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it goes against your original agreement....I wouldn't do it. What if he and all his guy friends wanted to have a strictly guys night out? How would you feel?
2007-02-02 03:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds unhealthy to not have time with friends. Is he trying to control you? Not a good sign.
2007-02-02 03:42:04 · answer #8 · answered by crct2004 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea i got sum advice1.HE is not the boss of you and if you want to go then go if he loves you he will let you go
2007-02-02 03:42:32 · answer #9 · answered by kate 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋