Can you provide some support & inspiration?

Question

I'm currently living with my mom, step dad, grandmother, and son. I was forced into moving due to a serious medical problem. I can no longer work, and daily tasks seem overwhelming. For the past 2 years I've completely disconnected myself for the entire world and all of my friends. I never could have imagined I would be in this position 5 years ago. I was a successful college student; I had a great job, an incredible son. I felt as if I could do anything, and the world was at my fingertips. I often wonder how I became this anti social, depressed and hopeless woman with no future. The truth is I don't know. I still hold tight to dreams, as they might be the last things I have. Deep down in my soul lives another person fighting to be set free, but my earthly body has it locked up tight with unbreakable chains. I am thankful for a family that provides a roof over my head, and puts food on the table. However, my selfishness desires demand more than the bare essentials for survival.

I wasn't the happiest girl growing up. My real father walked out on my brother & I at age 5, and at 8 years old I was molested by a family friend. Then I relived that nightmare at age 11 when my step dad molested me. Over the years I forgave the men that destroyed my childhood and took my innosence. Never to forget the pain they caused, and the path they put me on. At 14 I was confused about everything, and was longing for a man's attention. The day after my 15th birthday I gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Now, at 9 years old he obtains remarkable skills everyone dreams of having. It may seem like I'm writing a book here, but I'm not. I need some emotional support. Like I said I'm living with my step father again, and my world is crashing down on me crushing my spirit.

Answer 1

You have every right to feel the way you do...and I hope you understand that your emotional state doesn't actually show what the real perspective is. It is easy to feel this badly when you everything is going the wrong way for you. I know you probably feel a ton of conflicted emotions. But listen, I want to tell you that you need to gain some perspective again. There is an alternative solution to every problem, you may need professional help to sort this out, but I 'm sure that you can sort it out.
I am praying for you as I write this, I don't have an easy answer for you, except to tell you that it will take time to rebuild your emotions and your spirit.
You need to speak with a professional who can help you make some good decisions.
Also I want you to pray (to whatever higher power you believe in)
If you don't believe in a higher power...than just pray to Jesus to hear your prayer.
I hope you don't give up. and I hope you realize that there is a way out, and it's just bleak right now.
Reach out to your old friends.

Answer 2

Well your selfishness will never let you do what you want to do. You shoudl be happy you are alive and who doesn't have problems. But seem to have just gave up on the world. You should live as the example that your family os showing you. They know you can be what you want to be, but it's up to you now and you should get up and not worry about nothing but been happy. So get up and stop been selfishish and remember what would be happening to you if you didn't have family helping you. And if you want to go that way, It sure is a bad way of paying them back for all the good tehy have done for you. Surprise them and come out and enjoy the day with them.So if you need a friend IM me or e-mail me anytime.

Answer 3

The Nazis promised the people of Germany hope and happiness- one must remember that, at this time, Germany was having its own 'Great Depression', and that no one had much of anything. They were desperate. Many were still angry over the unfair treatment they were given in the Treaty of Versailles for WWI. The Nazi program was seen to be for 'the larger good'. People swarmed to the offer of a better future, and as more people joined the movement, it became easier to join. If everyone was doing it, it must be right- you didn't want to be the one holding everybody else back. Have you ever heard of group or mob psychology? Look it up. Basically, it says that the larger the group, the less people think as individual, conscientious people, and the more they follow the mood of the mob. Fear also played a part in it- as people saw what was happening to others who were victimized, or who resisted the Nazis, the more they wanted to avoid the same fate themselves. The first step in breaking away is always the hardest.

Answer 4

It is not being selfish wanting to live a normal life. You just want what the majority of people have in life. Good health, a good job and your own home. I don't know what your serious medical health issue is, but hopefully it is something you may recover from and if you can, start from the begining. It is never too late for you to live your life. Everything happens for a reason and it may take years to find out why. But things will only get better from your breaking point.

Answer 5

You are not alone. My wife and I are both disabled due to chronic pain, fibromyalgia and failed back surgeries. Your story sounds like ours. My wife had a great career and was outgoing, energetic and always traveling. Going from a life like that to being in pain and unable to work changes your life dramatically. We rarely go anywhere because we never feel up to it. My wife joined an online support group that has helped her cope with it some. I suggest maybe you try to have contact with other epople who understand what you are going through because no matter how they try, others cannot understand the whole scope of the changes, and the depression that goes with it.I wish you the best and just know that you are not alone.

Answer 6

Please read the Bible & pray, as I have just done for you, As soon as you are done, you will feel it, God hears everything my friend, He will help you, he is allways there, but you must live life the way he wants you too, it's hard, but who said the right way is the easy way, 90% of the time, it is the hard way. But due to that, God feels your pain, but he wants you to know him, because he knows you. Sometimes when we go thru the pain, it brings us close to God, or at least opens the door, the next move is yours, Open The Door, I promise he hears you, I Know....It is universal light, but don't forget, where ther is Universal good, there is universal Evil, enjoying what they are doing to you, Pray to GOD, to protect you, hang Angels on the wall, pictures, etc., My friend, do this & you will thank me, or better yet, Thank GOD......ELOHIM

Answer 7

I know you are disabled, So I hope you are getting ssi. i would take my money and get a cab to get on housing take my child and get food stamps. Get away from the man who molested you as a child, and worry about him molesting your child! Get food stamp. There are forms of transportation, to get you to and from the welfare office, and get public housing. As long as you stay on them you'll be at their mercy. I hope you the best. I know you can do it. You just have to know you can do it.! I think it only takes two weeks to get on public housing . Section 8 might take a year.

Answer 8

honey...it doesnt matter what happened in the past...just live ur life to the fullest...that lil boy deserves to have a mommy that loves to have fun with him and watch him grow up...dont let his life slip way...and as for the men molesting u...i was raped at 16...i was a virgin til then...yes i still sort of fear men...but hey it happened in the past and he got what was coming to him...u cant dwell on it..i know its hard..love and let live...u need to pray to God to comfort u and show u the way to go. as for living with ur stepfather...u need to get out of there...i understand u have to be there right now..but u can get help through the state...they provide housing for less fortunate...just contact ur local salvation army or churches for help...theres always a way out..my ex husband beat me all the time and raped me...but u see now im getting married to a man that loves me...because i didnt settle...i raised my standards and prayed...church can be ur cure.. God bless you and good luck.