My friend (or rather this girl I know) told me that she is depressed. She is really quiet and is sort of a bookworm and we are both living abroad in France with another 60 americans. It is hard because we cannot always find the "love" or "shelter" that our real families might provide. In any case, I told her that she needs to put herself out more and be more social but honestly beyond that I am sort of lost. she doesn't really like to go out and she doesn't have really any friends because she is so quiet. What can I do or say to help her?
2007-02-02 03:07:30 · 8 answers · asked by maddi 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Try to get her active and involved with yourself and the others abroad. Encourage her to partake in activities, go on tours, enjoy the museums and rich culture France has to offer.
Having something to occupy your time and people to share that with will do wonders for the the spirit. Just be a friend, share in her interest and introduce her to yours.
Being abroad can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation, getting involved and experiencing a new place may help ease those feelings.
2007-02-02 03:15:59 · answer #1 · answered by smedrik 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My suggestion, since only your friend knows just how depressed she is, is that you do a search on suicide warnings, just in case your friend is depressed to the point where she might consider taking her life. You just never know. If your relationship is close enough with your friend, I would consider asking her if she feels she might harm herself or otherwise consider taking her life. If she answers "yes" OR you identify red flag signals when you read the suicide warnings, I would help your friend get some professional help fast.
Your post didn't indicate how long you and your friend have been living abroad, but it couldn't be easy. That's one of the reasons I chose to attend college where I could still live at home - I just didn't want to go through being away from my friends, family and where I grew up. So, I applaud you both for having the inner strength to take yourselves so far out of your "comfort zone".
If your friend is just naturally shy, "putting herself out there more" is a pretty tall order. You have to have at least some outgoing characteristics to do that, a trait that is usually lacking or very weak in shy people. My suggestion is to identify things/places that interest her and suggest going on one of those outings with her one on one. Just try to start small with her. My guess is once she does, she'll see a world full of exciting things, people and places that she is missing and want to be part of it.
In any case, there's definately hope for your friend. I used to be shy. It's just something that, as your self-confidence grows, eventually goes away. Good luck. You sound like a caring friend.
2007-02-02 11:29:12 · answer #2 · answered by loveblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start here:
http://www.wikihow.com/Special:LSearch?search=depression&fulltext=Search
1. Be supportive. Let them know you are worried about them and are there for them.
2. Let them talk without giving advice. Sometimes all they want to is talk about how they feel.
3. Suggest or encourage them to get professional help. This is a mental illness that can be cured with the right treatment. Don't think it'll go away by itself.
4. Be a friend to them. Spend time with them. There are few things worse than adding loneliness to depression. Exercising with them or other non-drinking activities are great ways to attack the depression directly.
5. Educate yourself about depression. Do some research about the illness. This will help give you a better understanding of what your friend or family member is going through. beyondblue and Reach Out! are good places to start.
6. the MoodGYM is a free, interactive internet-based program designed to prevent and decrease symptoms of depression. This program is run by the Centre for Mental Health Research at Australian National University. Well worth a look.
Good luck. The world would be a better place if everyone took an approach similar to yours. Learn how to help, and do your best!
2007-02-02 11:17:55 · answer #3 · answered by Brett W 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She may be depressed, but being a book worm and quiet could simply be part of her personality.
If you care to attempt to have a friendship with her, invite her out to spend an afternoon at a coffee house or something in France.
2007-02-02 11:16:09 · answer #4 · answered by joy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just talk with her. Have fun, don't bring up the fact that she is deppressed unless she dose, cause if it was me it would make me depressed..lol. Find someone who is somewhat like her, or whose personality will interwine with hers. I guess the key is to be around people people people.
2007-02-02 11:16:23 · answer #5 · answered by shizzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi Maddi....al u hav to do is...just giv good company 2 u r frnd.
Ask her 2 stop thinkng abt d past...u cant chnage d past..do u ??
b cheerful..future is 4 dose who njoy in doing work..i dont talk much abt dipreesion coz its common in nature...Do some creative work by sitting @ home...if she is really intersted in buks...its very gud....ask her to share what she got frm tht buk !!
Ask her 2 write articles..r go 4 painting...cooking.Gardening is d best practise in life..japanese used to do @ home....dont worry ..its her life.....being a frnd u wana do som thing..ok fine....try dis tip...n finally ask her not 2 go 4 anti-dipression pills..bye..Mahesh
2007-02-02 13:54:26 · answer #6 · answered by mahesh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GIV HER TYME she'll come around....if she doesnt try talking to her...n dont take no for an answer!
2007-02-02 21:23:35 · answer #7 · answered by Michelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen to her problems and do not judge her.
2007-02-02 13:35:16 · answer #8 · answered by denise g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋